A different kind of complicated grief?

[fzald]

All of the feelings we experience during grief - sadness, longing, even depression to a point - are considered normal for some time after a loss.

What I've read about complicated grief seems to state that it's usually defined as a prolonged, unrelenting grief that has lasted for a significant amount of time and is also disabling the person's ability to function - some articles claim that after six months of disabling grief, a complicated grief scenario seems reasonable, and especially if deep grief lasts over one year.

But my own situation has a twist. It's not even the specifics of my situation that are important, but the fact that I had proceeded through "normal grief" and by about the three-month mark was well on my way to recovery from grief. Naturally, I have never forgotten my beloved GF, and thoughts of her gave me strength and focus. I fully integrated the idea of living "for us".

The situation that I refer to is new information. In my case it might be even more complicated since the information given cannot be substantiated, but assume that it could, or assume it's other information that was kept from you not related to your relationship with the person. Suppose, for example, that you found out you were lied to by a family member or other contact about some circumstance of the death to "ease the blow". Or suppose you find out that something perhaps could have been done to prevent the death. The important part is: imagine you learn this information years into your grief. You've mostly healed, you're moving forward, but then you get a new piece of information that brings you right back to square-one.

Would you consider this to be a "complicated grief"? It doesn't seem to fit the profile - I haven't been disabled by grief for the past 3 years, and my "recovery" time was pretty quick in my opinion given the circumstances. So does the grief I feel now simply mean I had not truly recovered? Does it mean I have "complicated grief"?

[KayC]

I don't worry about affixing a label to it, but put more emphasis on getting the professional help needed to make your way through it.

[KayC]

15 hours ago, fzald said:

So does the grief I feel now simply mean I had not truly recovered?

I believe grief has a beginning but not an ending, but it doesn't stay the same, it's ever evolving.  Certainly something new could set you back as in you now have something new to deal with that hadn't shown itself before.  But you are working through it!