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Sudden Loss Of Dad on Mother’s Day


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My dad, my hero, my example of how love should be, died in a violent traumatic way in front of me. He was in the hospital to have brain surgery. He had glossopharyngeal neuralgia (extreme facial pain) for 8 years. He went in for his surgery and came out just fine. A few days later he had complications and returned back to the hospital. It happened to be my night to sleep over with him at the hospital to keep him company and Mother’s Day morning he complained of a heavy chest. Long story short the nurses did not listen to

Me when I told them there was something seriously not right. I begged for them to listen to his heart. They disregarded me and said he was having a panic attack. He died in front of me.

I am 28 years old and struggle with nightmares. I struggle with what will happen after death. I am religious and so is my entire family. I lost triplets after their birth a few years ago. It seems like hit after hit. And 2 months ago my

Mom had a stroke.


I know this is a dumb statement but why does it feel like god is punishing me?



Sent from my iPhone using Grieving.com

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Dear MissMorg,

My deepest sympathies and condolences. I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved father and now the sad news about your mom's stroke. It is a lot for one person to cope with. I don't think your statement is dumb at all. If anything, I think we all have that question from time to time in life because its so horribly unfair. Why do bad things happen to good people? It is something that we all struggle with. Sadly, I don't think there are any good answers. The cliché about life and its ups and downs is all too true. I wish I had a better answer for you.

I'm so sorry those nurses did not respond to you as they have should have. I know its horribly painful to watch a loved one die and to feel helpless. You are a very loving and caring daughter and I know you did not want to see your dad suffer.

Please know you are not alone. And if you want to there are many supports in the community and through church. It helps to talk it out. Everything you are feeling and thinking is normal and natural. Grief is a very tough and long road.

Keep taking it day by day and do the best you can.

Thinking of you. Sending my thoughts and prayers.

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