Members Tollee0620 Posted December 30, 2018 Members Report Share Posted December 30, 2018 I’ve been with my husband for 10 years but for the last 3 we’ve been struggling. We were doing just fine until he told me he felt like our time was up and he told me I deserved better ( like it was his decision) what started this whole thing 3 years ago was my husband developed a narcotic and drinking problem and starting smoking weed which I don’t mind every once in a blue moon but every day what the heck. I both meet in the army so the man I married didn’t do things like that. So after he started these habits after he got medically discharged from the army which I think devastating him. He had a complete mental break where I had to check him into a mental health facility. And even though all of that I stuck by this side and now he’s just threw me away like that trash. After he told me a month ago this was how he was feeling I was shocked we had just celebrated out 10 year anniversary we were so happy. And now this. I feel so hurt and betrayed, he drug it on for a couple of weeks and just lead me on that we were going to make it through this which hurts so bad because I tried even harder then ever but he told me nothing had changed for him. I said we needed to separate, I just can’t do this which him anymore. I feel like my heart is shattered and he doesn’t even care, I never thought in a million years he would hurt me so bad. Please any advise would be, words of encouragement because part of me wants him to wake the heck up and the other thinks maybe it’s for the best Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators KayC Posted December 31, 2018 Moderators Report Share Posted December 31, 2018 I am so sorry, I know this hurts like hell and out of nowhere it seems... I want to direct you to a site where I think you can get some help, whether it fixes your marriage or not, I believe they have the tools to help you figure out what to do. https://forum.marriagebuilders.com//ubbt/ubbthreads.php Dr. Harley started this site, he's a renowned marriage counselor and author of books on marriage. I've been told you have to first start with the drug/alcohol problem, and unless/until that's been dealt with, you can't make headway with the marriage. That puts the ball in his court, and if he's unwilling for rehab, that gives you some direction of where you need to go from here. I'm sorry, it feels unfair because it is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members MichaelPerry Posted April 25, 2019 Members Report Share Posted April 25, 2019 Hi! I perfectly understand your controversial feelings towards your husband when you love and want to save the relationship but want to escape for your own good at the same time. I guess you need to take more care of yourself and get distant from your husband until he asks for help. If he does, there is a good website with a lot of info on the rehabilitation of various addictions https://addictionresource.com/drug-rehab/ . Please, stay strong and remember that your personal comfort and well-being is more important than any relationship, even such great as you had with your husband. Hope for all the best for you and wish your husband soon recovery. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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