Members WaHaaf99 Posted October 1, 2018 Members Report Share Posted October 1, 2018 I've noticed that I have waves of grief and I don't know why to be honest. Which, I am not really complaining, but I just don't understand. I think because of the seasonal change. I am getting memories because this is when I started realizing things about myself and he helped me through a lot. He helped me understand things better and comforted me. We met in September 2016, and so these next few months will be difficult because I have a lot of memories from this time. The holidays are tough too, but I guess where I am getting those memories of things again, it hurts a lot. I had a bad dream about him because I stress a lot about things so he was in the dream in a negative way, and I know it was not a visit because I was stressed and hurt in it, and also because I didn't feel him or feel good in it. Also, I don't really remember too much about the dream now. Just the stressful aspects, but I still have a lot of pain and grief. I don't cry each night or anything like I did, but I still hurt each day. I really don't have a question. More like a discussion starter. Like, does anyone have waves where they will be OK and then later on the grief is just higher than usual? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Sheena0426 Posted October 1, 2018 Members Report Share Posted October 1, 2018 Wahaaf99, I exactly feel the same way.. you are not alone. At times, i feel that im taking steps forward but there are days that i feel like im falling backwards..The profound pain, numbness, sadness and heaviness come in waves. It's terrible. As for me, the feelings come in random. I quite don't understand myself. Xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators KayC Posted October 1, 2018 Moderators Report Share Posted October 1, 2018 I don't think there is an answer as to "why", grief is just like that, it can come in waves for all of us. When it goes three steps forwards, two steps back, we are overall moving forward, but think of it like a zigzagging motion, and this is normal. Holidays stir it up and whatever feels most comfortable for you to handle it (minus alcohol, which is a depressant, not what we need) is right for you. I continue to put a tree up and hang his stocking in his memory, he loved each and every holiday and had so much zest for life, so I do it for him and like to think he's here with me, sitting beside me, enjoying it with me. http://www.griefhealingblog.com/2015/11/coping-with-holidays-suggested.htmlhttps://www.griefhealingdiscussiongroups.com/topic/9038-tips-for-handling-the-holidays/https://www.huffpost.com/entry/getting-through-the-holidays-when-you-are-newly-bereaved_b_582c7767e4b0466f4579334f Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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