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14 years slipping away from me!

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Well, its been a week and a half since my wife said we sre getting divorced.  To top it off I am going through some serious legal troubles that could go so many ways.  It could range from not so bad, to extremely bad.  Ive been in shambles and cant deal with the emotional pain.  We have had so many troubles in our marriage from infidelity on both sides to her having a child with another man.  We were going to get divorced 7 years ago.  We went to court and everything, then at some point we decided to stick it out.  I didnt seek help for my anger and problems of resintment towards her.  So I beame so angry that I lashed out all of the time.  Now look at me.  Im getting what I deserve.  How do I fix this?  I would do anything to get help and us give it an actuall try.  Neither one of us can say that we gave our marriage a shot.  Is there any hope?

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