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Hello,

My name is Dom Wigley and at the moment my friend Lucie and I are working on a  film idea about a teenage girl  who loses her boyfriend to cancer and never moves on but embraces her single life. Yesterday I realized me and  Lucie have no idea so I have decided to post on here. I know what it's like to lose a brother but  not a partner, to help you i have put   some questions

 

How long has it been since your bf passed?

How long were you together?

My character wanted children, to substitute  this  she \throws herself into being the best aunt possible,  did the death of your bf effect you being an aunt? If so how?

 

Thanks

 

Dom

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It might help you to immerse yourself in our threads here.  Read, read, read, it is all our story of grief...the loss of the person who meant the most to us.  The loss that affects every aspect of our lives...we lost our Love, our sexual life, the person you talk over the day with, the person you spend holidays, nights, and weekends with, the person you share finances and chores with, the person that co-owned your pets, the person who held you, made you feel protected.  Even things like going through surgery are complicated now as there's no one waiting in the waiting room, you have to solicit someone to drive you home, and there IS no one to look after you while you're recuperating.  It's no longer easy to go on a retreat as your partner would have stayed home with the pets and looked after them for you.  Everything they did that you don't know how to do, you either have to learn how to do or hire it done and pay for it.  There are no fancy cruises, no anniversary celebrations.  There is no one that "gets you", no one that shares your brand of humor, no one that cares, let alone understands.  Do you get an inkling of how vast reaching is this grief?!  Not likely...not unless you've lived it.  It is every minute of every day.  There's not a day goes by but what they're on your mind.  You never stop missing them.  Never.

It's been 13 years since I've lost my husband.  We knew each other 6 1/2 years, married 3 years 8 months.  My husband's family all disappeared on me after the funeral...most of them even before.  So there is no "being an aunt", that seems an odd question.  Many had stepchildren that exited our lives or are left with children to raise...or never got to realize that dream at all.  Our friends disappeared immediately...it seems "death" is uncomfortable, in addition you're no longer part of "coupledom", it amazes me that people discard you just when you need them most but that's a side effect that is very common.

I've been on another grief forum over 13 years, had grief counseling, read books, countless articles (I have a vast collection of them), even did art therapy.  I started a grief support group in my town as they'd never had one before.  Our lives change so immensely.  This was the one person in the world that I had it all with, the greatest love, we adored each other, our wedding rings had an infinity symbol on them, and inscribed inside was Soulmates thru all time.  "All time" continues still, but we never dreamed his life would be physically cut short like it was, he'd just had his 51st birthday.  We were supposed to grow old together, that's why we purchased the porch swing.  Today it sits empty...the cat that took it over also perished two years ago.

 

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30 minutes ago, KayC said:

It might help you to immerse yourself in our threads here.  Read, read, read, it is all our story of grief...the loss of the person who meant the most to us.  The loss that affects every aspect of our lives...we lost our Love, our sexual life, the person you talk over the day with, the person you spend holidays, nights, and weekends with, the person you share finances and chores with, the person that co-owned your pets, the person who held you, made you feel protected.  Even things like going through surgery are complicated now as there's no one waiting in the waiting room, you have to solicit someone to drive you home, and there IS no one to look after you while you're recuperating.  It's no longer easy to go on a retreat as your partner would have stayed home with the pets and looked after them for you.  Everything they did that you don't know how to do, you either have to learn how to do or hire it done and pay for it.  There are no fancy cruises, no anniversary celebrations.  There is no one that "gets you", no one that shares your brand of humor, no one that cares, let alone understands.  Do you get an inkling of how vast reaching is this grief?!  Not likely...not unless you've lived it.  It is every minute of every day.  There's not a day goes by but what they're on your mind.  You never stop missing them.  Never.

It's been 13 years since I've lost my husband.  We knew each other 6 1/2 years, married 3 years 8 months.  My husband's family all disappeared on me after the funeral...most of them even before.  So there is no "being an aunt", that seems an odd question.  Many had stepchildren that exited our lives or are left with children to raise...or never got to realize that dream at all.  Our friends disappeared immediately...it seems "death" is uncomfortable, in addition you're no longer part of "coupledom", it amazes me that people discard you just when you need them most but that's a side effect that is very common.

I've been on another grief forum over 13 years, had grief counseling, read books, countless articles (I have a vast collection of them), even did art therapy.  I started a grief support group in my town as they'd never had one before.  Our lives change so immensely.  This was the one person in the world that I had it all with, the greatest love, we adored each other, our wedding rings had an infinity symbol on them, and inscribed inside was Soulmates thru all time.  "All time" continues still, but we never dreamed his life would be physically cut short like it was, he'd just had his 51st birthday.  We were supposed to grow old together, that's why we purchased the porch swing.  Today it sits empty...the cat that took it over also perished two years ago.

 

just to clarify the  aunt question I meant because she never had kids she made up for it with nieces and nephews

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