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Weekend plans


LeannC45

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I know that people don't mean to be insensitive but it ends up happening anyways. I have a coworker that asks me what my weekend plans are every week. I don't want to be rude but I really feel like saying "what do you think I am doing!" I am literally struggling to survive and patting myself on the back for even being able to make it through a work day. Most weekends I get out a little but unfortunately the overwhelming sense of loss consumes me and I end up staying in the house. What freaking kind of response do people want. Ugh...Or they will continuously talk about how fast the year is going by and that literally rips my heart out. They just don't get that even thinking about what month we are in is hard for me. Each new month takes me further away from the last time I saw my husbands face. Each month brings with it new milestones, anniversaries, holidays, birthdays on and on and on that are all without my beautiful husband. I get so angry sometimes...I will never say anything because I know they don't mean any harm but it still hurts like hell.

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Maybe you should say something. I don’t know but at my work if someone says something I usually say something. But I am very blunt and always speak my mind. I know where you are coming from though. I had a co worker coming how her life was falling apart to me cause she was dating a married man and the wife found out. I’m like you are really complaining to me the girl who just lost her fiance and you think your problem is big and devastating? People don’t think or they try to make pointless conversations. I struggle every weekend just to get out of bed. I know how you feel but next time say something don’t be rude but it might make you feel just a little bit better! Not much but for that moment.

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@LeannC45  I answer the "what are you doing this weekend" with "I simply float through each moment as my weekends are so different now without Wayne,,,,,,"  I've also come back with an " I don't know....my life right now is a blank canvas and I'm deciding on the colors of paint."  It may bring a level of awareness and understanding to the individual asking.  

I cant explain why but it helps me.  

 

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1 hour ago, Just here said:

I struggle every weekend just to get out of bed.

me too

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My answer to everything anymore is I don’t know!! I don’t know how i feel, what I’m doing, how I am, or what I want... All I want is my best friend back and I know no one can do that... the struggle is real

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Leann, I would say something...maybe not what you FEEL like saying, because like you said they don't mean to be idiotic, but they ARE being insensitive and it needs subtle calling attention to...I think I would say, "My weekends are nothing like they were since my husband is gone, it's enough just to get through the day."

And Just Here, seriously, your coworker is complaining because a guy's wife found out they've been cheating?!  God they're lucky I didn't respond, I'd probably tell her she's lucky not to be murdered.  

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35 minutes ago, KayC said:

Leann, I would say something...maybe not what you FEEL like saying, because like you said they don't mean to be idiotic, but they ARE being insensitive and it needs subtle calling attention to...I think I would say, "My weekends are nothing like they were since my husband is gone, it's enough just to get through the day."

And Just Here, seriously, your coworker is complaining because a guy's wife found out they've been cheating?!  God they're lucky I didn't respond, I'd probably tell her she's lucky not to be murdered.  

Thank you for all the responses. I agree I think I will say something the next time my co-worker asks me a stupid question. I am just tired of this person in particular thinking that my life is somehow normal again after only 7 months. KayC, LOL, I love your response about the cheating coworker...Oh my goodness I could see myself not reacting well to that either. 

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Lol... ya I just got up and walked away..smh Normally I would of probably said something that got me in trouble but these days I’m just here keep to myself and don’t have enough effort to waste on people like that. 

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I'm one that tends to speak my mind, unlike my sister Peggy that never asks questions, doesn't stand up for herself.  I guess that's why she's always had more friends than me, LOL!

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