Members gmh1013 Posted June 17, 2018 Members Report Share Posted June 17, 2018 My wife died around 8:30 PM on June 8th 2014.....she was 72 and im 61.....Im disabled and have been for 10 years and use a walker from a motorcycle wreck years ago. I found her in the tub dead she had been sick for the past 3 months and felt bad and I had took her to the doctor that morn.....on the way the to the doctor at a light she looked at me and said "Greg, im going to die today...... im worried whats going to happen to you. She never ever calls me by my first name.....it shocked me but She looked bad and had been saying that for a long time ......but something this time by the tone of voice worried me. We went to doc.....drew blood and got her to eat McDonalds a Mcmuffin....she ate talked with her daughter for a long time took a nap....but when i was watching her sleep something did not look or sound right......later she came in to my room about 8:30 and said she was going to take a bath.....I said ok and she called on our cat who always goes with her to sit on tub edge.about 20 or 25 mins passed and i did not hear anything except fox meowing at the door.....i knocked to ask u ok? .....no reply so i opened the door and saw her in the rub and i knew right away she was dead but was so shaken it took me 3-4 mins to dial 911....when came came they would cpr she was gone....my life is over.....dont know what do.....worried about what will happen to my 3 maine coon cats....im so worried im sick. I was told i had 2-6 years with the MS and autoimmune stuff i have....I want/ready to die but worried about cats. I have no kids.....all my family is dead....my brother was killed in nam in 71. life sucks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators KayC Posted June 17, 2018 Moderators Report Share Posted June 17, 2018 I am so sorry for your loss. As with any loss, there are secondary losses, particularly with loss of a spouse. They are the person we count on, feel secure with, and it can really shake up our world when we lose them. Not only do we have to deal with their absence, but these thoughts assail us, our support system is gone! A friend of mine is 75 and recently adopted a dog. This was one of his considerations. He lives in the country, very isolated, with a locked gate, and a very long driveway. If his dogs were to cry out no one would here them. He decided on a course of plan...he would check in with someone every day. If they did not hear from him on a given day, they were to call his appointed person to come pick up the dogs and assure they're cared for. He's planned for them in his will so it won't burden someone else financially. I kind of wonder the same thing too. I'm 65 and live alone with my dog and cat. I'm active in my church and senior site, so I know I'd be missed, but it might mean a couple days before someone actually checked on me. I'm trying to get someone interested in following through the way my friend has. I'm sorry to hear of your prognosis. Sometimes doctor's predictions can be way off though. They gave my MIL 3 weeks to live (she had cancer) when they sent her home from the hospital. She lived nearly three years after that. You've found a good place here, I hope you will continue to come here and post. There's nearly always someone around to respond shortly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Glolilly Posted June 18, 2018 Members Report Share Posted June 18, 2018 Do you have a Case Worker or Social Worker who could supply you with in home care services? Do you have a neighborhood watch association that could help get assistance? You may need to think about calling animal services for advice as well. Do you know of any assisted living that you may need to check on if home care services is not sufficient for full care? Is there a nearby support or neighborhood church that you could talk with? Praying for you to get the courage to live a fruitful life and have your needs met. I know your wife would want you to go forward without because she mentioned her concern. Blessings. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members gmh1013 Posted June 18, 2018 Author Members Report Share Posted June 18, 2018 My S.S. check would never cover the cost of I would love to move into Asst Living but cant afford it.....I may could afford for awhile but thats it....may two years. Im really worried if i dont die soon what will happen. I was thinking about buying a small used RV and living in it.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators KayC Posted June 19, 2018 Moderators Report Share Posted June 19, 2018 My mom got dementia and at stage 4 needed 24/7 lockdown, but only had social security coming in. We had to sell her house to pay for her care and they told us Medicaid would kick in once her assets were gone through. If you need assisted living, it would be the same, they'd have you go through your assets first, then Medicaid would pay for your care. Senior and siabled services does have help available though for someone who needs help with housekeeping, grocery shopping, paying bills, bathing, etc. They'll cover so many hours a week, I know because they offered it to my mom once. Contact Senior and Disable Services, they can send someone out to help you through the process. Please try not to worry so much, there are helps available, you just need to be appraised as to what they are. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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