Members Sandy hippy Posted June 4, 2018 Members Report Share Posted June 4, 2018 When I just started to cry my husband said what's up.I just said my brother is going to die.I cannot explain why I said this. My brother came to stay at our caravan with us and he asked me why don't you move back to Shropshire. I hate Shropshire but cut my story short we sold our bungalow and went back. My brother turned up on the day we moved in. And again the following day he was to come stay the following night but phoned me he had been coughing a lot and really felt unwell I told him to get an ambulance and phone his daughter.We went to the hospital the docs said he had a clot near his heart and he needed surgery right away. He said no I need to think about it the Doc said you can't go home you WILL die. He sat playing with his phone something he never did. Then said ok. He had the opp it went well he sat up I even fed him some fruit. The next day he was in a bad way they said he had an infection. Cut this short he was very poorly then he had 2strokes 5 weeks it went on and sadly he passed he died of sepsis. I still cannot accept this, why. We found out what he was doing on his phone that night he was took in he was saying goodbye. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members careyboot Posted June 5, 2018 Members Report Share Posted June 5, 2018 sandyhippy, I am so sorry. My brother just passed on 9 May 2018, and I am in the same state of shock and inability to accept it as you. I completely relate. It sounds like you were there for him. Even though you hate Shropshire you were able to be there during his illness and his death. I feel so similar to you. Sending you love. Below is a pic from my brother's memorial on Sunday. Sending you love and hoping you can feel that you are not alone in that feeling of not being able to accept what happened. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Nicole-my grief journey Posted June 5, 2018 Members Report Share Posted June 5, 2018 Sandy hippy, Love to you. That is so much, so quickly. Sounds like you are an intuitive and obviously it was such a deep connection you felt it before it happened. I knew in my gut instinctually that my brother “B” died. I felt it with everything in my mind and body. Family kept telling me he was fine and just out of contact, but my soul knew. I kept pushing for going to check on him and when no one would help me, I went to his apartment and I found him. My worst fear was true. I felt him him guiding me to him for days. It was such a strong feeling. And then when I was in his apartment, I felt his spirit guiding me to get my dad out there and call first responders. It was on another level. I don’t tell everyone this because some people don’t believe in that kind of thing. All I know is it’s what I experienced. I also felt my first brother who passed guiding me on things and giving me strength to make descisions. In both cases I delayed my grieving (not on purpose, it’s just how it occurred) and then really went into it full force which has been so hard. Although nothing can change what has happened to all of us and I know it’s normal in grieving to go back in the mind and think: maybe something could have changed it, or why did it happen, how did it happen, I can’t believe it happened and so on and so forth...it doesn’t make it any easier to process all of it. It is all shocking and hurts. What an amazing sister you are to be there with him and nurturing, worrying as I’m sure you did. You were there for him in the end when he needed you most and what a great comfort for him. I pray you receive the comfort that you need. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Nicole-my grief journey Posted June 5, 2018 Members Report Share Posted June 5, 2018 4 hours ago, careyboot said: sandyhippy, I am so sorry. My brother just passed on 9 May 2018, and I am in the same state of shock and inability to accept it as you. I completely relate. It sounds like you were there for him. Even though you hate Shropshire you were able to be there during his illness and his death. I feel so similar to you. Sending you love. Below is a pic from my brother's memorial on Sunday. Sending you love and hoping you can feel that you are not alone in that feeling of not being able to accept what happened. What a BEAUTIFUL memorial. Thanks for sharing it with us. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members careyboot Posted June 6, 2018 Members Report Share Posted June 6, 2018 sandy, as hard as it is, your story has parts of it that sound like there were signs that your brother's death was coming. and while i relate to the feeling that it should not have happened since i go over all the ways i could have acted differently and somehow prevented my brother's death in my mind, i also relate to signs that were left in advance. in the days before my brother died of a choking accident (complicated by alcoholism) he pulled a childhood picture of himself from his wallet and gave it to me. he was just out of jail for his 3rd DUI, and had started drinking again, post-jail. he was staying with me while he tried to get a bed in a rehab (and kept getting turned down). i took it and put it on the shelf and the moment i set it down i had a terrible sinking feeling, and wanted to give it back but didn't. it makes me sad to think of it. seeing any photos of him makes me sad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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