Members TanyaJean Posted May 19, 2018 Members Report Posted May 19, 2018 On March 26th, 2018 I lost my son at the young age of 23. In October of that year my son, Devon had a seizure was hospitalized but couldn’t figure out why he had it all tests showed him good. But he was a weight lifter and purchased muscle drinks or prework out pills and stuff off the internet. So doctor told him could be that and recommended him to stop them. Devon never again ordered off the internet and we went to the proper safe stores to purchase them. He was even put on a mild anti seizure/anxiety medicine for precaution. My husband and I own a construction company and remodel exterior work on homes. On March 26 my son went on a roof ( maybe 6 ft high could jump and touch gutter) was only up there 4 minutes and he had a seizure and fell head first into concrete landscaping blocks. My husband saw it all tried to run to him. He held him in his arms after the fall. A very very awful sight my husband still won’t tell me the details but his shirt was covered in blood. Devon was life flighted and arrived dead on arrival but a brain surgeon got blood and pressure off the brain and brought him back. But injury was just too bad and he died on the 28th. My world my everything my baby boy!! I am crushed beyond any words. I miss him so much. Just in a blink of an eye my world changed forever. My life will never be the same. I go to bed thinking okay made it through this day only to realize I have to wake up and face it again. It’s exhausting! My husband is angry and holds the images in his head. We are fighting a lot. Why? Why? It’s so devastating and that’s not a strong enough word.
Members Tommy's mum Posted May 19, 2018 Members Report Posted May 19, 2018 tanya jean I am so sorry for the loss of your son it is a heartache that cannot be described. To have a young life snuffed out so quickly is horrific. I too lost my eldest son Tommy but in 2015. He was on a dorm room ledge trying to get his suicidal friend back in the building. They were 14 floors up. When he had persuaded the young man in eventually they were climbing back in through the window when it shattered and they both fell. My boy died soon after from his injuries the other kid survived. Our world was shattered and simply has never been the same again. Those early days and in particular that first year without your child are the worst I am sad to say. I think of him every day several times a day but that is the love a mother has for their child. Men and women act and grieve differently. Men tend to express more anger because they feel responsible have something they could not control and want something to blame, women are more emotionally volatile and cry and mourn. A death does implode a family and cause rifts but they can be healed with counselling. Men also try to keep everyone together and neglect their grief forcing it down so anger is the predominate emotion it is easier to display anger than grief. It is important to recognize where each person is at and try to heal together because you both lost your son. I hope there is someone close who can help support you, as many people do not know how to handle this kind of loss. We all meet on loss of an adult child by Mom of Justin at the top of the thread page the one with the most views. It keeps us all in one place to support and help each other. We are all mourning the loss of a child/children of all ages and they were lost in a variety of ways but we intimately know what you are going through and would like to invite you to join us on that thread. Just post on it and you will get quick responses of support. You are not alone ok?
Members JRr Posted May 31, 2018 Members Report Posted May 31, 2018 I’m not going to say I’m sorry cuz after a year and a half of hearing “I’m sorry” you become sick just hearing those words anymore, I know this pain, and there are no words to make it better. I know what your husband is going through, the day my boy left, I seen something no human should ever see and no one will ever know, and it’s to protect them. No man wants to tell his sons mother details. We as men are supposed to protect our loved ones, and that’s where the anger comes in. He couldn’t protect his boy, he couldn’t fix it and make it better. Just like I feel everyday since then, your husband loves you that much, he wants to fix it and can’t. It’s an awful feeling, but believe me he will realize that it’s impossible, and start to focus all his love and support on to you.
Members shorty16 Posted June 1, 2018 Members Report Posted June 1, 2018 Tanya Jean, You have come to the right place. Many of us have walked this horrible journey before you and can offer insight on what worked for us and what did not. we have a new life now and we go into this new life kicking and screaming. It will take a long time to process the death of your beautiful boy. Please join us on Loss of Adult Child and go to the very last page for the most recent posts. Colleen, Brian's Mom forever
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.