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The Fairfam

I joined this site 1/31 in hopes to gain a clear mind... my mother departed from earth on 3/13/2016 after asking me to move to another state with her and she had a freak accident in home & hit her head on a coffee table and the next 6 months she was paralyzed in Veggie state... I had to care for her as she was like an infant and couldn't move. while i found out i was PREGNANT a week after her fall my brother and sister abandoned me with all the responsibilities... they didn't even call... I am a mom of 5 and I suffer EVERYDAY... I don't want to continue living because my heart hurts and I'm just so angry... my therapist told me I'm experiencing the first stages of grief altho it's coming upon 2 years. 

I started vlogging daily to help distract my pain and mind... it helps but I battle my life daily... not sure what else to do... I am miserable.. nothing is the same anymore.  

2 years later I shouldn't still feel like I wanna die


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Dear Fairfam,

I am very sorry for your pain and sorrow. I know its extremely hard after everything you have been through. It takes a long time for our minds to come to terms with our devastating losses. My one therapist told me it could take up to 5 years to accept my new reality.

I'm sorry to hear how your brother and sister abandoned you with the responsibility. I know that hurts a lot.

Please know you are not alone. Keep taking it moment by moment. Day by day. Keep vlogging and reaching out and connecting with others. I also found these websites helpful.

What's Your Grief.

The Grief Healing Blog

Grief in Common

The Grief Recovery Method.

Grief Share.

Thinking of you. Sending all my thoughts and prayers.


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Hi Fairfam,
You say nothing is the same anymore. Nothing will be the same anymore for all of us. But it doesn't mean there is no life left.
What I did - I turned myself around by looking at the positives. I focused on what I had been given, rather than what had been taken away. I remembered all the good times with my mother. I kept remembering the good.
I also got my head into work like your blogging, something to distract my thoughts.
It is 7 months for me today. I'm much better now. I'm not great. I still miss my mother but I'm not depressed. The anxiety has gone. There are still good days and bad days but overrall, it's mostly OK days now.

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