Members andrewsmother Posted December 21, 2009 Members Report Share Posted December 21, 2009 My son Andrew was only 19 years old. He was killed in a car accident this Saturday December 18 2009 at 3:15 am. I received the dreaded call at 5 am in the morning telling me he had been in an accident. At the time, I didn't know how bad it was, I got the call from their dad who got it from my other son. All I can say is that what I am going through is something I don't wish on anyone...ever...I cannot imagine what my life will be like, how I can ever go on, but I feel I have to be strong for my other son Chris. Chris and Andrew were very very close. They both gave me so many headaches, those horrible teenage years, but I can say with certainty that I know both my sons love me dearly and in spite of their bad choices due to their short age they both have a huge heart. My son Andrew was an artist, he loved music, all kinds, he was an old soul, he was funny, he was so very talented, he participated in drama at school and was a damn good actor. He was a little off course, but was trying very hard to put his life together, he was looking for a job, he wanted to start college, he had plans. He was a free spirit that believed in peace above all else. He had a terrible temper and often blew his fuse, but after a while he would apologize and feel badly about his outbursts. For some reason since my kids were babies I always kissed them on the lips...and until his death my son although already a man still kissed me on the lips, regardless of who was around. He was my first born, my baby, my first love. He was killed instanly in a car that had 3 other teenagers, all others survived, my son didn't. The driver of the other car took a red light and is being charged with vehicular homocide. How does a mother go on? I can't sleep, and I dread his service...is it wrong not to want an open casket? People are telling me I should want to see him one last time but the reality is I want to remember him alive, the thought of seeing him dead in a casket is too much for me to bear. Please I need some words from other that have gone through this, I can't do this...I'm dying inside, my baby is gone and I'm never going to see him again....I want to feel better but at the same time I feel if I do it means I'm forgetting him and I don't ever ever want to forget my little angel. I need help! I need support...I need to be strong for Chris who needs me more than ever. A final word to my son...Andrew...I love you so very very much....I certainly hope there is a heaven because I want God to hold you in his arms and take care of you! I am sorry for the last fight we had, please understand I always just wanted the best for you...but I am so sorry we didn't make up before you left this earth...Please know how much I love you and how much I miss you....Please give me a sign that you're ok and ask God to give me strength to endure this pain for your little brother who is so devastated! I love you my angel....you will always be with us...Always...I promise you.....it will always be the three of us...forever.....Mami Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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