Lost my daughter

[genesseesmommy]

I was 20 weeks and 4 days pregnant with a girl. She is my first child. I was so excited, happy, joyful I was so ready to become a mother and everything. Everything was going great. Till I found out I had a cyst on my left ovary that I will have to be watched very closely cause if it burst bad like the doctors think it would it could kill my daughter. Well I was starting to feel really bad pains in my lower back and stomach. Doctor told me that I will have that when it burst. Told me to lay down and put a heating pad on my back to see if that helps if it continues and gets worse to go to the hospital. So I did what he told me. It got worse over the time so I went to the hospital like he told me to. Came to find out that my daughter had the cord rapped around her neck and that they cyst burst and leading to her inhaling the infections. I feel so bad cause I don't know if I would of went to the hospital sooner if she would be alright. I do blame most of it on my doctor cause he should of known that something bad could of been going on. But he didn't. I blame myself cause I feel like there was something I could of done. I feel such a bad mother. I love my daughter with all my heart. When they took her out I asked the doctor there if I could see her and hold her bends it would be the last time. They let me I cried because she was so beautiful. She looks just like her daddy when he was a baby. She is my beautiful baby girl and now my guardian angel. I just try to be strong and try to get through this but it hurts so bad and I don't know how to help myself get better through this hard time in life. If anyone can help me have any advice please feel free to tell me. I never been through this and I just know that my daughter wouldn't want me to be miserable for the rest of my life.... R.I.P. Genessee Rayne Thompson!!!

[westleysmom]

I'm so sorry for your loss.  Of course its not your fault, but that's what mommy's feel when something happens to their babies.  I never lost a baby, but my 20 year old son passed away in January of this year and I struggle with guilt every day.  Come over to Loss of Adult Child, I know it sounds different than you, but there are people over there who have been through losing young children.  I haven't been there long, there may be somebody who has lost a baby.  We talk about everything and they're all very kind.  Even if you find a place where it is only people who have had miscarrages, the peopl on Loss of Adult Child will have some comfort to offer you.  They have helped me so much.  Again, you will always be her mommy and you will always miss her, and it wasn't your fault. 

Rhonda Westley's Mom

[genesseesmommy]

Thank you so much I will have to do that. I know deep down in side of me that it wasn't my fault it's just what my mind tells me when I let it wonder around. A friend of mine that lost her daughter here from pekin told me about this website so I am kind of new around here. but i will be in that group you told me about thank you for your kind words...

God Bless you

Genessee's Mom

[Kelly]

Dear Members,

We are excited to mention that we are moving to a more new and improved message boards on MONDAY MORNING AUGUST 9th! The boards will be done for a few hours while we are making the conversation. Remember we posted information about this move a month ago. For some of you this might seem a bit sudden,  but when we were reviewing the site we determined the current message board you are using is out of date and the company that designed it is no longer in existence. The good news is this new message board will have new features that have been requested in the past like more fields we can add to your profiles and a chat room up to 20 people at one time. If we find the chat room is bursting at the seams we will add additional room for extra people. All your old posts, private messages and such will be migrated to the new message board. You might have to put up your profile picture again but not sure. The new company will be doing the migration for us. Here is a short list of some of the new features on the board:

- Custom Profile Fields- Users can customize their profile pages by selecting a background color or background image, with tiling options.- Facebook and Twitter Integration- users can respond to multiple posts at once with "mini-quote"- Pinned discussion threads - like welcome to our board etc.- Announcements made across some boards or the entire message board- Search: Users can easily find all content generated by a particular member, by clicking the 'Find Content' button that appears on the main profile page, or in the Mini Profile Popup which can be accessed throughout the board. The results page allows content to be filtered by application, as well whether the member created it or merely participated in it. - Privacy: allows users to sign in anonymously, hiding them from the online users list. Users also have the option to disable personal conversations and user-to-user emails, as well as ignore other users if necessary.

The next exciting piece of news about the new message board is it will have a new domain name of www.grieving.com for search engine optimization purposes. It will still be apart of Beyond Indigo and can be found through www.beyondindigo.com. We will be redirecting your current URL's to this new domain name but we might miss a few. If that is the case simply go back to www.grieving.com or www.beyondindigo.com to find your message board thread. We will try to make the transition as seamless as possible. 

The bottom line is the new board will give us room to grow our community and more options to interact better with each other. 

If you have any questions please direct them to feedback@beyondindigo.com. 

Kelly Baltzell, MA

CEO/President

Beyond Indigo Family