Loss of an Adult Child

[mikesmum]

Dee - Thanks for the laughs. From a time long ago yet so fresh in the memory.

Found this one.......http://

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fUujIMN3m50

[mikesmomrs]

Dee: Thanks for the cartoon and the memories...Ralph and Kim used to watch cartoons every Saturday morning...poor man...all he wanted to do on Saturday morning was sleep in, but she'd be up and by his side, early as could be, poking his shoulder..."daddy, daddy, we go watch tartoons!" They'd sit there til the last frame came by on the screen for the day. Damon happened to catch a Foghorn one with Ralph a while back...it was the one about Foghorn being a "loud-mouthed schnook!" All the way home, Damon was in the back seat "Chicken?! You ain't no chicken..you're just a loud-mouthed schnook!" and then he would just collapse laughing at himself, giggling so hard he couldn't catch his breath long enough to say it again. As for the school vacations...yes, it would mess up the kids who attend different schools, as well as the working parents, and mostly, that wonderful, long summer that you and many teachers deserve so, so much. I am so glad the presentation went so well for you, though there is no surprise about that for me.

Amy: Sorry for the scare with the little guy...Glad he was okay, even though you had to go to the store. Mike's middle son, Kameron, spends the night with Jameson a lot on the weekends. It has only been this last year, year and a half, that he has been able to be depended upon to stay the WHOLE night long. Many a sleepover would find her schlepping him back to his house, after he would show up beside her bed, sobbing that he just "had to go home" and would she mind taking him? Of course, she always would, but then after a few months of not being able to stay over because of that, he finally got to where he was able to stay the whole night. Now, she can't get him to go home! lol!

Trudi: I love that Mike would draw Marvin...and especially that he was so kind to his cousin, Luke. Our Mike loved to draw also, but mostly adventure figures, etc. He did some for the boys, which they still have. Likely the heat AND the distance from the sound of your falling waves have combined to make you "scritchy" to get back to your haven. "Heat" is not a problem here...just cold, and MORE snow on the way. I'd send you some if I could...the pathway from our front door to the driveway now has over two feet of snow on each side.

Missing Mike so much these days...I remember how this time of year would get to him beginning in January...some years he would almost withdraw, and once the spring was here, with its warmer and longer days, he would return from his winter self and the smiles and jokes would come again. I wish I could see that sparkle come into his eyes again. Ah, it is not to be...not now...not here. Only in my heart, for now.

love and peace, carol mikesmomrs

[Guest msnher]

Hi everyone. I can't sleep.

Gary and I were just talking about cartoons and how they've changed since we were kids. Whatever happened to Saturday morning cartoons? The grandkids love spongebob, Dora the explorer, Handy Manny, etc. I don't allow them to watch the cartoon channel at all anymore. Too many adult themed, offensive cartoons.

Greg - I'm anxious to find out about the idea Brian gave you. I never did follow through with having you do the picture of Stephanie. I don't follow through on a lot of things these days.

I think the cold, winter months might be adding to my depressed state, too. I certainly felt better and had more energy today. I'll complain about the heat in the middle of summer, too, though. Sometimes there's just no pleasing me.

Betty, how are you?

[mysonrich]

Several times a week I drive by the long lane that leads to the former home of Anne and Charles Lindbergh. Having grown up in this area when the fields were farmed, the Mcmansions having not yet taken root,and always knowing that the house was there, it was history to me. Tragic history . There are many variations to this sad story ,mostly debate on who the true murderer may have been. There was always doubt that the man arrested ,tried and executed . Some thought he was innocent.

Now when I ride by I feel such of feeling of sadness. as if I drive through a fog of grief and suffering. A sad bend in the road. I was reading last night and found this piece written by Anne Morrow Lindbergh. Her words written so long ago are reflected here on BI. Time and space does not alter grief and sorrow.

Contrary to the general assumption, the first days of grief are not the worst. The immediate reaction is usually shock and numbing disbelief. One has undergone an amputation. After shock comes acute early grief which is a kind of "condensed presence" -- almost a form of possession. One still feels the lost limb down to the nerve endings. It is as if the intensity of grief fused the distance between you and the dead. Or perhaps, in reality, part of one dies. Like Orpheus, one tries to follow the dead on the beginning of their journey. But one cannot, like Orpheus, go all the way, and after a long journey one comes back. If one is lucky, one is reborn. Some people die and are reborn many times in their lives. For others the ground is too barren and the time too short for rebirth. Part of the process is the growth of a new relationship with the dead, that "véritable ami mort*" Saint-Exupéry speaks of. Like all gestation, it is a slow dark wordless process. While it is taking place one is painfully vulnerable. One must guard and protect the new life growing within-- like a child. One must grieve, and one must go through periods of numbness that are harder to bear than grief. One must refuse the easy escapes offered by habit and human tradition. The first and most common offerings of family and friends are always distractions ("Take her out"--"Get her away" --"Change the scene"--"Bring in people to cheer her up"--"Don't let her sit and mourn" [when it is mourning one needs]). On the other hand, there is the temptation to self-pity or glorification of grief. "I will instruct my sorrows to be proud," Constance cries in a magnificent speech in Shakespeare's King John. Despite her words, there is not aristocracy of grief. Grief is a great leveler. There is no highroad out.

Courage is a first step, but simply to bear the blow bravely is not enough. Stoicism is courageous, but it is only a halfway house on the long road. It is a shield, permissible for a short time only. In the end, one has to discard shields and remain open and vulnerable. Otherwise, scar tissue will seal off the wound and no growth will follow. To grow, to be reborn, one must remain vulnerable-- open to love but also hideously open to the possibility of more suffering.

--Anne Morrow Lindbergh (1906-2001 ), Hour of Gold, Hour of Lead (1932).

[hotrod]

Good Morning Indigos

I have been reading sporadically as we have no computer access. I have become a "silent Indigo" I think of you each and every day and smile at the thought of your angels and all the love and memories shared here.

I marvel at the courage of each of you and appreciate your participation when I cannot verbalize.

Carol I did smile at your memory of Ralph and " Cartoon Saturday " I was the one selected to share those with Stephen. When he was very little he would come in , jump on me and say "Mommy wake up-- cook Bacon and Geggs" and watch "Underdog"---- daddy stay asleep a[/b]nd have a nice rest " I. like Ralph was so tired and all I wanted to do was sleep . Really , really glad that I responded and shared those precious days..

I too am startled when I catch my reflection in the mirror when I am out. Dead eyes are still very much there except when I am posing for a picture. I was shopping yesterday and it happened again The sadness is so very evident and I really do not recognize myself immediately Amazing.

Betsy[/color] such a powerful reflection. Thank you

The portion that spoke so intensely to me was the idea of "rebirth"

and in the end, one has to discard shields and remain open and vulnerable. Otherwise, scar tissue will seal off the wound and no growth will follow. To grow, to be reborn, one must remain vulnerable-- open to love but also hideously open to the possibility of more suffering.

I do believe I am trying hard not to let scar tissue form but it takes a great deal of work

Dee, Trudi, Carol, Bonnie, Sherry, Sus, Crystal, Michelle, Rhonda, Karen, Beth, Sonya, Greg , Betsy,Leah,Amy and all Indigos in my thoughts each day Thanks for being here even when I cannot

Have a peaceful day

[kmb22]

Edit

[ericasmom]

Dearest Betty, you may be silent as in, not able to speak in a daily or weekly way, but not silent in our hearts, always present from the bond we formed over time. I think of you daily and hope that you'll soon be back in the comfort of your home. I so hope that this time away is a bridge of comfort for your Sister and therefore for you too. Blessings.

Betsy, what beautiful words you posted for us here. The words quoted brought tears as they are so RIGHT ON in the description of allowing mourning, letting it come forth and the absolute worry that so many have for more heartache. At times I am paralyzed by the thought but I also cannot close off my heart in such a way to protect it. I have a poem, not mine, from a book I am reading that I will post that somehow answers that piece of Ms. Linbergh's.

I dog-eared it while I read to remember to post it here.

The Summer Day by Mary Oliver

Who made the world?

Who made the swan, and the balck bear?

Who made the grasshopper?

This grasshopper, I mean-

the one who has flung herself out of the grass,

the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,

who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down-

who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.

Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.

Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.

I don't know exactly what a prayer is.

I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down

into grass, how to kneel down in the grass,

how to be idle adn blessed, how to stroll through the fields,

which is what I have been doing all day.

Tell me, what else should I have done?

Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?

Tell me, what is it you plan to do

with your one wild and precious life?

Carol, I love that Damon laughed himself silly with Fog Horn Leg Horn. I laugh out loud too with the funny ways he says things. And Trudi, I was laughing outloud a minute ago when watching Daffy run up and down the steps of the space ship to announce his greatness in the 24.5 century. Hilarious. thanks.

Sus, no sleep< well that is no fun but maybe later a nap.

Amy, yikes, that would have floored me, any child or adult that has any history of asthma should always have their inhaler. That is just plain scary. Glad that he is fine.

Karen, I do hope that the woman who so selfishly took advantage of your good heart is out for good. My goodness, how do folks really live a life off of other, parasites. I am cruel I know to say that word associated to people, but really, to move in out of need and live out of expectation is just boggling for my brain. My prayers that you are free of her.

I do hope that the argument and separation of soul, spirit, heart, and brain/body will one day feel more peaceful. I do believe that the separation is for survival, that we must isolate each entity in order to function in a daily way until we are ready or more ready to merge those components of ourselves. It is not a process we could ever understand until we are there. And we are all there, with you, some of us a bit behind you using your steps to help them along, and those of us ahead of you on the path leaving our steps for the same. And while those footfalls do allow us sisterhood adn brotherhood on this journey, that process is still a lonely battle that each of us must face.

Loving you all

[ericasmom]

Prayers please for the family of Kathy Weidow, a former teacher at the school where I am. She was retired for two years and in the last 8 months has been dealing with brain cancer. Prayers as she left Earth this morning, heading into the the blue-sky. She was Jonathan's teacher when he was in 1st grade for a while as his teacher was sick. Then she became a full time teacher, high energy, well loved.

[summergirl]

Hello Dear Indigo's -- It is another cold day here but the sun is shinning so that makes it better...

Yes Dee, I am ok for now, the shine is back in my eyes due to Tavian and for some reason I am not so anxious - at this moment - I am sure as Feb 18 comes closer I will spiral downward but am hoping not too....I have Tavian's birthday on the 11th and I will be happy, I will celebrate with a smile on my face and know that Jessica is happy that I am doing so. It is the following Friday, exactly one week later that will slam me like a ton of bricks. I am thinking of taking the day off and just being, remembering, or maybe do something that Jessica and I used to do together.....a manicure, a little shopping - taking my girl with me....Right now I am just day to day. Prayers to your teacher friend who has passed.

Yes, Tavian has big plans to take care of us and I appriciate all of the humor you all got out of it. To tell you the truth I do not know where he comes up with the things he does, the mind of a child is one that you cannot explain....they pick up many things that others talk about when they do not realize others are listening. This coming week I am taking him to one of the food pantries here and we are going to donate a few hours to helping out....I want him to see that there are people who need so much and have so little. First we will go to the store and buy some groceries which I will let him choose from the list and then we will go. I believe it is important for him to see another side.. Right now he is at his friend Damiens house, had a sleep-over there last night - so I am actually in the recliner and not doing anything but resting.....been a long time. Thinking of many things I could do but "nope, it ain't gonna happen" lol

Barry / Gary - no worries I know who you are talking about - a slip of the finger on the key board can change alot of things.

We had our first dinner party in our new home last night and we had a wonderful time.....dinner was fantastic, company great and alot of good laughs.....I have to say my hubby is a great cook, thank goodness as I hate to cook but love to bake......

Lori - the pic of Kourtney is the perfect one.....I love it and it will be so beautiful....

Ok, time maybe to grab my book and kick back and read some, probably fall asleep for a bit but who knows.....enjoying the quiet before Tavian gets home......Love, Peace and Strength to all, Kathy

[Guest msnher]

Karen - I love the way you write. I caught the end of The Greatest a while back. I turned it on when Pierce Brosnan's character was in the depth of his grief, I think in a hospital room? I began sobbing with him before I even knew what it was about. I love the part where their son's girlfriend is demanding to know about him (the son who died) and the family began recounting facts about him. It was truly a touching movie. I would love to watch it from the beginning.

Thank you for sharing your experience with your young "roomie". It helps validate some of the decisions I've made lately. I do stuff like that...keep quiet or even compliment the "parasite" sucking the life right out of me. Great comparison, Dee.

I also like what you said to Greg about leaving us in suspense. LOL I'm sure the wait will be worth it....just don't forget that we're waiting, Greg. That was my first thought when I logged on this morning, wondering what idea Brian gave you.

Betsy -I also appreciate the quote by Anne Lindberg. I don't want to be vulnerable, either, but I'm afraid just loving and caring about others makes us so. I am hoping there will come a day when I am not so afraid that something WILL happen to someone I love so I can live more freely. Right now is not that time.

Betty - Once again I am touched with your gentle spirit. I am glad the quiet you are engaging in is one born of peace and not of desperate resignation. I may ask again about you, yes? For my own security. I want to know all my Indigo family is also safe and still on this side of life.

Dee - I am sorry for the loss of your friend, Kathy Weidow. What a wonderful tribute you have given to her. Her family will be in my prayers. I also love the poem you quoted by Mary Oliver; it was written so well....a grasshopper eating sugar out of her hand.

Kathy - I'm glad you had a good time at your first dinner part in your new home. Lucky you having a hubby who enjoys cooking and does it well! I'm glad you're taking the 18th off of work. I hope you are able to make it through doing things you and Jessica enjoyed. A loving, but difficult, task for me to accomplish at this stage of this journey.

Nap time. I went to my meeting this morning, but I was so tired (and a bit grumpy) I may have spoken harshly when silence would have been a better friend. I'll decide if I need to apologize when I am more rested. Sometimes the harsh truth is necessary and sometimes the harsh truth just doesn't change a thing...just upsets people.

Oh. A bit of a ramble....Yellowstone "took a deep breath" which is considered just something to take note of. It is scheduled to blow anytime from now until another 100,000 years. Several months ago I had a dream that it was ready to blow and all of us were racing around like mad men trying to store up on survival items for "afterwards". In my dream my son kept telling us all we were fools that there was no way of survival. All of a sudden, in my dream, the ground began to shake and we heard a loud explosion and the next thing in my dream was we were all "shooting" upward. I felt a little warmth, but no pain, and it took me a moment to realize our bodies were dead and this was all of our spirits "flying" and we were being escorted by many, many angels. In my dream, there was no thought of what had just happened or whom we were leaving, we were all just excited about the flying and the angels and the view of "space" I remember dreaming I found I could fly really fast and all I had to do was think the thought and I went faster. The angel flying in front of my "group" cautioned me (with a laugh) that it is easier to follow him/her from behind than if I fly out in front. It was just a dream, but when I read about Yellowstone "breathing" today on the news, it brought it back. I don't think we have to be afraid of death. It's this life and living it fully that scares the heck out of me.

Nite for now.

Susannah/Stephanie's mom

[briansdad]

Finally...... after 800.00 and a bunch of BS I have a new computer built. Thank God. Now maybe I can get something going for Angel Images.

[ericasmom]

Congrats Greg on the newly built computer...

Sus, sleep and then access the situation as to whether or not apologies are needed. I too have had to learn, the hard way, to keep my thoughts sometimes to myself which I find difficult. I spoke up via email at work as to the proposed wage freeze that we have been asked to take. I am very much against it and said exactly what I think about it adn why it had come to that. I was not reprimanded per se, in fact i was told thank you by many of the district teachers, but others who are more powerful were not amused. No matter what I said, more teachers voted for the freeze than against and so now we look to next year without an increase and in my opinion this is a pay cut. We all know that the cost of living and insurance will go up, with pay frozen...well go figure. Anyhow, pisses me off. (excuse language, I am a swear hound).

Kathy, sounds like a great night last night, super fun. I am glad for you guys to feel settled and comfy enough to have guests. I know the upcoming birthdays are difficult at best, but boy oh boy, those are dates that are the sweetest too.

[aim630]

I am so exhausted & worn out after this weekend-I feel like I need a vacation from the weekend. Not used to having little kids around anymore. We took the kids to a meet & greet with the Cleveland Indians today, although we really didn't get to meet or greet the ones we wanted. We got there an hour early, and still were about 500th in line. I don't even think that many fans go to the games! Of course, this was free. The kids were relatively good considering we waited in line about 3 hrs. By the time we got to the front of the line, the player whose autograph we wanted had already left. Audrey got carsick on the way there, so we had to stop & get her & the car cleaned up. Lucas loved all the mascots, hugging them. I think he liked them more than the actual players we met. So now the house is a complete disaster, but I have to get up & go to work tomorrow,and I don't feel like cleaning anything.

Kathy & Susannah- hats off to you for all the hard work you do! Katie is wiped out right now too, and she is only 17!

Not looking forward to the next couple of weeks, and being so busy & stressed at work is not helping. There is no way I can take February 9th off, much as I'd like to. I dreamed last night I quit my job, telling my boss that I hate planning my life around my job, but I've been there 10 years, and jobs are hard to come by. Katie will be leaving in a few months anyway, so it won't matter so much any more.

Good night,

Amy/Ashley's mom

[summergirl]

Greg - good for you and as good as you are on the computer I am sure anything you do we will love and appriciate.

Suz - yes, at the stage where you are on this journey it is diffacult to think of doing anything remotely somewhat happy I know.....I do not know what to do with myself actually - just thoughts on what I might do - facing the 5 year angelversary is beyond my comprehension right now, I cannot wrap my mind around the idea that it has been 5 years since the worst night of my life.....I am trying not to let it send me into the black hole, I don't want to go there.....I am trying to be positive and remember all that I had with Jessica, all the wonderful beautiful things she brought to our lives and though I want her back more than anything I know that cannot be - so I thought maybe if I did some things that her and I used to do - just the 2 of us - maybe, just maybe I won't drop into the hole. On this journey one never knows - all can change in a moment.

Thank you - yes, our dinner was great and Barry is a wonderful cook - he did a pork roast with a wonderful marinade, fresh green beans with balsamic vinegar and chives, twiced baked potatoes with brie and onions.....dessert was home made brownies and home made peach cobbler......everyone loved it.....Then we played a game called LCR (Left, Right, Center) it is a dice game and lots of laughs. It felt good to have my friends here and they were so excited to see the house....they were shocked at what we have accomplised since we moved in. Anyway, we had such a nice time we have decided to do a dinner once a month, taking turns at each others house.. breaks up the winter especially as bad as this one has been.

Well, off to watch a bit of tv with Tavian so I will say good night....back to work tomorrow and they are talking snow again for Tuesday !!! Love to all - Kathy

[ericasmom]

Hi All,

Looks like the mid-west may get a big old storm this week after all. We are supposed to get anywhere from 12 inches on up, we'll see if it really happens. I would love it as long as everyone is safe while driving. I am three miles from work so could walk if need be. The district rarely takes a snow day because we are predominantly a walk-to school, though we have buses for those that are 9.2 blocks and beyond away from school. So it would be fun for th ekids to get a blizzard type snow.

Going to bed my friends, hope everyone, (especially you Amy), gets some deep sleep tonight. I am with Amy on the raising young ones Sus and Kath, I don't think I would have the physical energy and certainly not the mental energy for raising young ones again. I know that your Daughters must both be so grateful that the kids are in the hands of ones so loving. My hat off to you both.

[4everjoeysmom]

Hello BI Family!

So tired and such a long, emotional day... Want to introduce to you my precious grandson, Greyson Joseph.

He's finally here! Born at 3:58 CDST today, January 30th, weighing 7 lb 1.4 oz and measuring 20" long.

All are doing well, and we are overflowing with joy...

Love & Blessing to you ALL!!!! 4everJoeysMom, ~Claudia

[mikesmum]

Courage is a first step, but simply to bear the blow bravely is not enough. Stoicism is courageous, but it is only a halfway house on the long road. It is a shield, permissible for a short time only. In the end, one has to discard shields and remain open and vulnerable. Otherwise, scar tissue will seal off the wound and no growth will follow. To grow, to be reborn, one must remain vulnerable-- open to love but also hideously open to the possibility of more suffering.

Betsy - We seem to forget don't we, those forgotten mothers and fathers that have 'lost' their child never knowing what truly happened to them. To live to 91 and never being able to lay you child to rest.....cruel beyond belief.

Kathy - Qudos on the party. I imagine the Barry and Kathy of old came through, amazing food, great company and many new memories to enhance the old. Great to see my friend.

Dee - Duck dodgers and the Chicken hawk....heros for ever. Thoughts of your colleague as she see the beauty waiting as she now finds her peace.

Carol - Saturday morning cartoons....my favourite 'waste of time' with the kids as they grew up. Folding washing transfixed to nonsense like Wiley Coyote....really doesn't he get it

Claudia - My friend I can hear that sigh from here. What a strong name for such a little man. Wrap him in you love my friend. Joey isn't far....just look into Greysons eyes....

Well, back from seeing Burlesque with Miss Em. Fabulous movie, the day was excellent. 12 going on 30 but still granma's girl.

Jeya and Zak are here watching a DVD before bed....End of long days tiring for all.

Just a hold your breath moment I need to share....

Melissa and her family, yes all of them, do Trail Bike riding. Motorbikes into the forest on tracks that you might not even walk on. Anyhew recently (New Years) James was riding with a friend when the friend hit a low lying tree branch. Fractures C6 & C7 incomplete. He now has a 'halo' apparatus fitted for the next 4 months. Following that he will be in rehab for about 2yrs.

But I digress. Melissa was riding this past Wednesday. They all wear the appropriate safety gear. Melissa was riding up an incline and ..... well when she regained consciousness she had a blood nose, large haematoma on the forehead, dislocated ring and little finger and of course struggled to remember how she got there, what day it was etc. She had lost almost 4 yrs of her memory. I saw her today in the day light. OMG..... I love the shade of purple and that deep deep blue green she wears on her racoon eyes. She says she has no residule problems, just a sore hand...

Ahh I feel better now....I know you all are feeling my breathing paused as this was relayed to me......

Cant wrap them up, but by goodness I wish I could......

[mysonrich]

Claudia, congratulations ! Will you be grandma now? Grammy?

Dee, I read the poem a few times so that I could place myself inside the words. I can 'see” them now. Beautiful.

Kathy, sounds like a great time and a good idea for the monthly gatherings. Tavian, well, he makes me laugh. You both are in good hands at home or down at the Shady Rest!

Betty, Spring. Its right around the corner,after the next snow storm of course. Stephen is with you,the spring time , the squirrels,the walks and park will soon be back to ease the ache.

To all..off we go.It's Monday already.

[briansdad]

Hello BI Family!

So tired and such a long, emotional day... Want to introduce to you my precious grandson, Greyson Joseph.

He's finally here! Born at 3:58 CDST today, January 30th, weighing 7 lb 1.4 oz and measuring 20" long.

All are doing well, and we are overflowing with joy...

Love & Blessing to you ALL!!!! 4everJoeysMom, ~Claudia

Good for you Claudia

[Bensmummy]

WoooooHooooooo! How beautiful is he and Love love love the name ..congradulations grandma...hugs Michelle

[ericasmom]

Claudia, the bright flamingo and purple sunrise here are accompanying the news of your Beautiful Grandson. I see so much of Joe in him alrady, the slant of his eyes...Congratulations Grandmom Claudia. News that feeds the hearts and spirits of many.

Trudi, OMG about Melissa. Goodness, that is scary. I know that you must of half jumped out of your tiny frame upon that news. Yes, good thing she looks good in purple.

[shorty16]

Congradulations Grandma Claudia

I love the name Greyson - never heard it before.

Colleen

[mikesmomrs]

Congratulations, Claudia, on your beautiful, blessed gift, your grandson Greyson. did he come early? Are you in the States? I know you had planned on being there for birth, which was originally February, or am I incorrect? Anyway, such good news, such a wonderful gift, and yes, oh yes, Joey is right there, as always.

sending love to you and your family,

Carol mikesmomrs

[Guest msnher]

Kathy - I think doing the things you and Jessica loved to do is a fabulous and loving idea. And, I'm sure Jessica will be with you, loving you. I didn't mean to sound so negative.

Claudia - Congratulations, Grandma! I, too, love the name Greyson.

Upper 40's on Saturday, below zero today. I think the snow will miss us. Keeping you all in my prayers. I don't know how much more snow you all can take.

Is today Nick's Birthday, Dan?

[4everjoeysmom]

Thanks Everyone! My heart is so full today...so much emotion, I don;t know what to do with it.

I will be called Na'na (which sounds like banana, without the ba)--fitting, I think, as I live in the land of the bananas and he's the newest little monkey.

His due date was Feb 5th, which was only 6 days off. Nikki had gone into premature labor a couple of months ago and was on bed rest for the remainder of the pregnancy, in medications to halt contractions. They took her off the meds at 36 weeks, so we were surprised that the baby waited another few weeks to full term. So amazing! I'll be seeing him in about a month--even more amazing!

Here is a picture of his athletic physique. He has very large hands and is very long, like his daddy Patrick, who is 6' 4". I am in love!!!

[4everjoeysmom]

Greyson Joseph - Nana's Little Nugget!

[westleysmom]

CLAUDIA-What a beautiful baby! I'm so happy for you that everyone is fine and that's over with. I make it sound like a chore, but I don't mean it that way, just that only when its over can you be sure that nothing will go wrong. I'm a Nana too, there really is nothing like it! Congratulations to you and to the whole family.

Trudi-Good grief! I'm so glad Melissa is okay after her scary ride. And the friend of your grandson, I hope he recovers soon, but it sounds like a long process.

Kathy-Did you wear a Madmen style dress and have martinis at your dinner party? You make me want to be a hostess, and we're terrible at that kind of thing! It sounds like you had a really good time, so much fun that you all are going to do it again soon.

Short weekend it seems, Saturday all day was funeral services for Uncle and then yesterday my granddaughter wasn't feeling well, so wanted to lay around on Nana and Mommy, by turns. Warm today and starting to rain (there goes the clean car), supposed to cool off more tomorrow. Have a good day if you can, all my friends.

[shorty16]

Dee

We heard about the weather also - Blizzard-like conditions. If I could stay home all week, I would say - SNOW SNOW SNOW. But since I have to work, driving in this stuff almost doubles my commute.

So think snow at night and sun during the day.

OK

Colleen

[hotrod]

Claudia

Thank you for sharing your new Grand child.

Such a bundle of joy and A precious gift .

I too love his name

[hotrod]

Dear Nick

Happy Happy Birthday

Touch Mom and Dad today in your

Very Special Way

[mikesmomrs]

Trudi: Oh my gosh, yes, I can feel your breath stopping all the way here....your heart stopping also...I know they must be free to make their own choices, live their own lives, etc., but I do so understand the desire to wrap them in a bubble forever! I am so glad that she is okay, and the shades of purple...well, battles scars that bring a prayer of thanks each time they are viewed. So, what do Steven and his family do for excitement? Hopefully, it's nothing more risky than perhaps bird watching?

Betsy: So good to see your morning post and your sweet Rich's smiling face...thank you for sharing the start of your day with us.

We have many birthdays coming up in February, and a couple of angel dates, as well...thinking of you all, and holding you close in thoughts and prayers as these days approach and bring with them those anxiety-filled thoughts of how we will get through them.

Betty: Thank you for keeping in touch...missing your daily posts, but know that you are needed and admiring you for your strength.

Dee: I am glad you are getting some snow finally...hope everyone stays safe and only enjoyment comes from the event. We, on the other hand, are not "getting some snow finally," WE HAVE MORE THAN ENOUGH AND ARE GETTING MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Supposedly up to 5" tomorrow, and then the whopper on Wednesday...though that MAY not be as huge as they think, though "it is getting to look like that as the hours go by" according to the local weatherman. Wednesday is the day we are supposed to pick up Damon...we'll see. I am hoping she just keeps him home, with her mom, so they don't have to be out in this, and neither do we.

Got tons of stuff to do today...Jameson and Kameron were over last night to watch a wrestling show and spent the night so they could get more sleep...Cathi came this morning to take them to school. Ralph and I went to a movie, and they had the place to themselves (Cathi was here), but WHAT A MESS! They had a good time, but...Jamie had a VERY restless night and actually only slept about an hour...his restlessness kept Kameron awake, and he only slept about 3-4 hours. I ONLY SLEPT 2 hours...

take care everyone, and have a good day.

love an dpeace, Carol mikesmomrs

[kmb22]

Happy Heavenly Birthday Nick, wrap your family in your warm love today. Dan and Mary, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

[kmb22]

Claudia - The baby is absolutely precious. Congrats Nana!

[westleysmom]

Happy Heavenly Birthday Nick

Dan-I hope the day is kind to you and your family as you remember the day you were blessed with Nick. You all are in my thoughts on this day that will bring tears and hopefully a few smiles. I don't think it will ever be easy, but I hope for all our sakes that it at least gets bearable, which sometimes now it seems it is not. I wish I could do a pretty picture for you with Nick in it, like you did for me of Westley, but just know I have one in my mind. He is smiling and happy and safe and warm and waiting to see you again. One fine day.

[ericasmom]

Dan, blessings on this day and each.

NICK, DO SEVERAL FLY-BYS (causing a gentle wind in your Family's Day),TODAY THIS SPECIAL DAY. HAPPY BIRTHDAY BEAUTIFUL NICK.

[Crystal16]

Dee- I actually had a nice time. I love to dance it's good for my spirit.

Claudia- Your grandson is handsome....Congrats!!!

Happy Birthday NICK surround you family with love and most of all peace.

Tomorrow is the day I go in for my surgery. I'm anxious to be done with it, already!!

[westleysmom]

Crystal-Hope all goes well tomorrow and you are back with us very soon.

[shorty16]

Happy Heavenly Birthday, Nick

Brush your butterfly wings against the cheeks of your parents today.

Thinking of you Dan and Mary

Colleen, Brian's Mother Forever

[mysonrich]

[Guest msnher]

Nick

[mysonrich]

Will it ever end ?!! " When the storm winds down Wednesday, there could be up to nine inches of snow and up to a half-inch of ice on the ground in parts of the state"

[daniellemom]

Dan and Mary - My thoughts are with you today as you remember your Nick.

Happy Heavenly Birthday Nick!!

Claudia - Your grandson is beautiful! Congrats!

To everyone - I think of you and your children every day.

Sonya (Danielle's Mom)

[ModKonnie]

Congratulations Nana Claudia,

He's precious!

ModKonnie

[aim630]

Happy Heavenly Birthday, Nick!

Dan & Mary-My thoughts are with you today as you remember this day that Nick was born, and all the happy memories you have of him. I hope you find some peace and comfort today.

Claudia-Congratulations on your beautiful grandson, Greyson. I know Joey is near and smiling at his handsome little nephew.

Crystal-Hope all goes well tomorrow. You'll be in my thoughts.

[nicksdad]

We appreciate everyones thoughts...Rough day and on top of it the flu

But, you do what you can do as you all know.

We did balloons and the latern things (Bonnie & Rich turned us onto those..pretty neat)

[mikesmomrs]

Dan, thinking of you today, and your wife and family. NICK NICK NICK...have a happy birthday and celebrate with all of our angels...surround your dad and family with your sweet spirit. Dan, I love the composite for Nick, so does he.

love to you, carol mikesmomrs

[Guest msnher]

God forgive me, I am NOT grateful any of you have rough days or are even here at all, but I am grateful to know I'm not alone and knowing you have a hard time with more time than what I have, I'm not as hard on me. I breath a little sigh of relief knowing I'm not so bad. Thanks.

How selfish is that? "Gosh, thanks for sharing your dark day so I know my dark days aren't so abnormal."

[ericasmom]

Dan, the balloons look like they are climbing heavenward and that the day was filled with Nick for you each. The flowers are lovely. I want to do the lanterns this year too, have to find out from where to get them. I wish you sweet dream/visits tonight.

The wind gives an occasional howl, letting us all know that indeed, a storm is coming. My district hardly ever closes down, but an email just came talking aobut the possibility on Wednesday...this must be big.

Cheers and deep sleep all, I will head to bed soon as I am all in.

love ya

[summergirl]

NICK, NICK, NICK - SPREAD YOUR BEAUTIFUL WINGS AND FLY BY YOUR LOVING FAMILY ON THIS YOUR BIRTHDAY......AS WE LOOK TOWARDS HEAVEN WE SHALL SEE THE BRIGHTEST STAR AND KNOW THAT IT IS YOU - --

Dan - Beautiful pictures of the balloons and lanterns. To see Nick's site so decorated shows the love and the never forgotten are there.

[summergirl]

Nana Claudia - I LOVE IT....A GRANDIE, GRANDMA, GRAMMY, ME-MAW OR MI-MI - any way you say it is absolutely wonderful. I am so happy for you.....and your family. Much love and big hugs......

Dee - Thank you but do not say that about yourself - you could and would do whatever you needed to do if you were left with a grandchild as some of us were.....Yes, I get tired, I get weary and there are times when I get angry, but never at Jessica or Tavian - only at what fate dealt us. I love when Tavian goes for a sleep-over or play date as I get to do nothing at all but I am glad when he comes home. We all need "me time" no matter what the situation so I take advantage of it when I can. I honestly have to take my hat off to Suz as she has 3 and I only have Tavian - although at times I feel like he is 3 kids some days - LOL

Suz - you were not being negative or a downer.....please do not feel as though anything that is said here is taken to heart as we all have found a way to read between the lines.

Again, thank you all - no I wore jeans and a sweater and oh yeah, my slippers (lol) for my dinner party - I am a comfy kinda person - lol. It was nice as we were still finishing up a few things when friends arrived and of course the women jumped right in to help and I made the guys set the table as I had not even finished that - it was cute to see them set it....they had silverware on different sides at each setting so you can imagine just how low-key the dinner party was......that is the best I think.......just friends enjoying each others company and we even talked about Jessica and how much she used to love to play LCR with us......

As I sit here tonight, Tavian sound asleep, Barry on his computer, I was thinking how 5 years ago today I had no idea that I only had 18 days left with my Jessica, 18 precious days and I did not know - oh what would I have done different if I had know that was all the time we had ????? Saddness is taking over so I will say good night. Love, Peace and Strength, Kathy