Loss of an Adult Child

[shorty16]

Enid

Bethany is a beautiful name.  And if I know Marcia, she is so honored to have both her lovely daughter and your handsome son in one beautiful name. 

Tears are flowing.

This truly is a loving family we have here.  We are all blessed to have found each other.

Colleen, Brian's Mother Forever

[shorty16]

Enid

I want to give also.  We are truly blessed and I do want to pay it forward.

Let us know how we can help.

Colleen

[heartbeataway]

"But oh, for the touch of a vanished hand and the sound of a voice that is still..." Tennyson

my heart is broken, shattered, my soul is different...and I truly understand your pain, as we all do...please know that... love and peace, carol mikesmomrs

Amen..........

Amen ........ again ........

[shorty16]

My BI friends

My job has given me access to this message board at work. 

Astronautics is privately owned.  The owners are wonderful to me.  My boss understands the ups and downs I have.  He does not have any children himself, so I am lucky to have a boss like him.

To day will be a good day.

Colleen

[briansdad]

Colleen...........Wooo Hooooooooo

I've just about had it with this freakin rain.

I had another bright idea.I'd like all of you to post some of your favorite Halloween pic of your kids.

Also just a note...Tomorrow is Bets son Dannys birthday.

http://daniel-pallick.memory-of.com/About.aspx

[mikesmomrs]

Enid:  I am so very sorry that you have been in such a deep dark place and am glad to hear that perhaps you are seeing a little light to help you make it back to the top again...We all truly understand that awful place and send love and strength to you---here is a picture that I keep by me to remind myself that no matter how dark everything is around me, there will always come that little strip of light to hold me from going under...that strip of light now, for me, is all of these loving friends here on BI...

Bethany is just beautiful; so sweet and gorgeous...I know that Marcia is honored to have had you do such a wonderful thing, and your sister and hubby are so very loving and kind to make the offer to you to name their little princess.   

I am glad that you posted your letter for your "Shower in a Box" and would also like to contribute...I can remember wrapping my children to bring them home, and was always so thrilled to do so...Kim (oldest, now 44) was wrapped in a beautiful, white wool "bunting" which they don't have any longer, but it was trimmed in satin with ribbons under the chin, and we actually still have it...Cathi was wrapped in a soft, little pink suit that was five inches too long, but looked so sweet against her skin, and Mike was in a blue two piece outfit that we could barely button and he only wore it only that one time (he weighed 10 lbs 15 1/2 oz) as it was so tight around his chubby little arms...I guess you could say it was his first "muscle shirt"...lol!  With each remembrance, I can't help but think of a little one going home without...it breaks my heart...

I would like to help some be able to be brought home in something soft and tender against their beautiful new skin...and through this "Shower in a Box" this will happen...please let us know where and how to send contributions...will an American bank check do?  Or, would we have to exchange the money before sending it?   Is it expensive to purchase things there---would it be better for us to send baby things instead of money?   I know you still have to work out some kinks for this plan, but please let us know as soon as you do...you are so loving and kind to do this...I know that your Ethan is so very proud of you for reaching out...

love and peace,  carol  mikesmomrs

[lolynbo]

I TRUELY DONT THINK ID BE HERE TODAY IF I DIDNT HAVE THIS WEB PAGE AND YAL TO CHAT WITH AND TO BUILD ME UP WHEN I AM DOWN...I CANT EVEN IMAGINE GOING THROUGH THIS WITH OUT YAL....LIKE YOU SAID "I USUALLY DONT LOVE STRANGERS" BUT ID FIGHT FOR YAL ANYTIME ANYWHERE..

THANK YAL FOR BEING THERE YEST AND TOMARROW AND..ETC...I SINCERELY KNOW YOU CARE AND I FEEL YOUR LOVE..

[shorty16]

Lorri

Ditto for me too.  I love the fact that all these parents know what our days are like.  I thought I was doing so good and them WHAM - the grief and reality hit me like a ton of bricks.

I LOVE YOU GUYS _ MAN

Colleen

[briansdad]

GROUP HUG 

[homeschoolmom]

I drove by the park where Rohan lost his life, and noticed not only new signage, but there was a marker right where kind folks had left stuffed animals and flowers for him 10 months ago. I couldn't read the marker, so asked Tony to go back that way so I could see it. Well, he did. And he slowed down enough for me to almost make out it wasn't Rohan's name. I think.  I asked him to turn around but there was an irritated driver behind, and T was more focused on him that on my anxiety...that maybe someone had mixed up the signs (I didn't order one), or maybe someone else had died there. It is 55mph going past the pedestrian crossing connecting the bike trail to the parking lot!! When he double-checked with me, I just told him to keep driving. My plan was to drop everyone at home, and return alone. It hit me that he will never understand the depth of grief I feel... He shouldn't have had to ask if he should turn back...

It is hard. I never got a marker in part because we left so soon after Rohan's death, and partly because I wasn't ready to deal with the permanence of his loss. While I know it, I don't want to have it staring me in the face. I don't want it to be true. I wish someone could tell me it's all been a horrible nightmare, and I'll soon wake up, and life will be back to rights. I wish...

Shelly, Rohan's Mama

[mikesmum]

Bethany - a beautiful name for a beautiful child......Paying it forward to those who need truly a selfless act.

Today is the Engagement.  Cooked all day yesterday....doing the last this morning...sleep is scheduled for tomorrow.

Bets, thinking of you and your boy Danny - Danny, let your  momma know you are there as only you can.......

Take Care - Trudi

 Found this, unknown author.....

[4everjoeysmom]

This is DEFINITELY a day for a GROUP HUG!!

{{{{Shelly, Lorri, Colleen, Greg, Carol, Trudi, Kathy, Katant, Terry, Terrie, Sonya, Dan, BETSY, and Danny's Mom Betsy, Sherrie, Claudia (Me), Bonnie, Beth, Mary Ann, Dee, Marcia, Brad's Dad, and EVERYONE who is part of the BI Family, Rody, Julie, Nancy, Eric's Mom Colleen, }}}}

Disclosure: Please for give me if I missed the specifics in adding your name. It was completely unintentional... I have a hard time keeping up since I've been away for what seems like a very long time, and since my laptop died on me, I have lost my entire file of grief contacts and friends ...

Love and HUGS to you all!!

[mpsmom]

Hello to all, I do not seem to be getting much better, or at least not as quickly as would suit me.  Larry told me today after he heard me on the phone that in fact i did not break my ankle but broke my leg and ankle in 3 places... Guess i wasnt listening, that is why i could not undertstand why the pain was so intense.  Anyway I am pretty much just able to lay in bed and sleep and watch tv and sometimes I navigagte to the living room for  short while, but cannot get comfortable unless my foot is elevated alot. 

Enid I am so happy that 'the princess' has arrived and that she and your sister are doing great...she is so beautiful.  For my Bi family, this 'arrival' is not  surprise for me, Enid talked to me a couple months ago and told me that when her sister asked her to name the baby, the only name she thought of was after my sweet angel. 

B ETHAN Y.  I am so honored, now I will absolutely have to plan a trip in my lifetime to Africa. 

I have pm'd a couple of you recently, but my mind and fingers are not working well together with the pain meds required for me to tolerate the pain and discomfort, I hoep to be back to normal soon.  Terrie, pleae tell us how your husband came thru his knee surgery, and Carol I think it is your sweet grandson that has the flu (or is it Trudi? I am sorry) is he feeling better?  Claudia the pictures and your writings about the wedding and your trip to the US were great, everything ws so very pretty.  Colleen, call me this weekend, I am pretty much a captive audiance, I am glad to hear the "Mike" thing is working out.   Shelley I am sorry you are having such a difficult time, how is Akiem doing?    I assume this is his first trip to the US?   Amanda, wiaitng for the sweet angel to arrive.  Betty I am sorry for the flooded kitchen, we have had two major floods in the house and they are such a horrible mess.  Dee thank you for your strength, I also will vote that you need to write a book.

Sherry, Betsy, Lynn, MaryAnn, Greg, Dan, Sonya, so glad to ahve all of you as family.

Love to you all, time to put the computer away... Marcia Bethanys Mom Forever

[mpsmom]

MamaBetts, may you feel your sweet Danny close to you on his birthday.

Hugs, marcia Bethanys Mom Forever

[arc4ever]

Marcia!  You poor thing you must be hurting like crazy!  Take care of yourself, please and rest as much as possible.  Hugs to you.

Enid, Bethany is beautiful, what a blessing to your family.

My husband's knee surgery went fine, it ended up he also had a torn miniscus, so they repaired (fixed??) that also.  Poor thing he does horribly on anesthesia and was in recovery for three hours puking with a horrrendous headache.  After a couple of hours, I finally got to go back with him and was told "we have given him everything but the kitchen sink to help" but it wasn't helping, he just had to get thru it.  We made it home fine and he slept all afternoon, his knee is hurting, but otherwise, doing okay.  Thanks for all who kept him in your thoughts.

On another note, got a call from Adam's best friend's mom (also a dear friend of mine).  She had several of the kids in her car last night coming home on a country road from a volleyball tournmant game and she hit a deer, pretty big one and it hit the windshield and tore her sunroof. Thank God everyone was okay.  She is funny though, she is an insurance adjuster and does car estimates and she said she was clueless and freaked out and didn't know what to do afterwards - I'm sure she was in a bit of shock.  The kids were all a bit freaked also, all but one of them that were with  her had been at Adam's accident site.  Rachel (Adam's best friend) said some weird things happened (not sure what that means, she wanted to talk in person)  Interesting...

Going to go place nursemaid to the husband, take care everyone.

Terrie (Adam's mom)

[nicksdad]

This is the little boys that was just put near Nick....The Lego cross is very nice..

[ericasmom]

ANd more tears, and grateful heart for the way that you are able to find your way through the sadness. Bestowing those in need with the items so many of us have had or have been given...well there is nothing more lovely than these Moms and Babies being able to go home in a warm and cuddly outfit, and to have the tools at hand to make each day work smoothly. I will gladly contribute to this as well, just let us know where.

The Little Bethany so perfectly gorgeous, and the two way gift of naming her; gift to your Sis, gift from your Sis to ask you. Gifts too to Marcia and to of course, ETHAN the big cousin. Using his name must make him GRIN.  May he smile on his Pink Cousin Bethany and may she grow into a 'pay-it-forward young lady.'

My newest great niece has been named Aerianna Moon. Aeri Moon. Spelled differently than my Eri but in her honor and the sound is music, chimes of her life sing out, and bless this new baby dear.

Okay, it poured today and last night. OUr yard looks like a turtle pond, without th eturtles darn it. I do love turtles. Anyhow, our parade was indoor, in the hallways and it worked pretty well for a school with nearly 600 kids. I was however, HOT, menopause hot. The parents provided a lovely party, snacks and a craft to make slime, as well as a great scary story read to them. It was fun.

Prior to the lunch bell when kids can go put their costumes on, I noticed that a morning dove was sitting upon the branch outside our second floor window at school. She sat there for over three hours. At several points in the day we would check on her, the kids talked with her, and finally I said when nobody was near, "Eri are you here for Halloween, my little bird?" The next time I looked, she was gone. Just letting me know that she is about.

So right now I am listening to Neil Youngs latest BRIDGE SCHOOL CD. Each year he plays a concert at the Bridge School which is a schoo that he and his wife started for children with communication disorders. The money from the concert adn the sale of the CD's cover the cost of a year at the school for the occupants. He often has other huge stars that come and play on the CD, they all contribute to his cause. I do abelieve that he adn his wife have a child with disabilities/differences that require a specialized school. I love that man. Again, the many ways of paying it forward.

I am loving you all throughout each day,

dee

[ericasmom]

Dan, I love the lego cross,and the pretty stone. How did Owen die do you know? So young. Prayers for his family. I know that they will learn so much from you, and maybe you will lead them to BI.

Yippeeee that the knee surgery went well Terrie, but how scary for the kids and your friend last evening. Thank heavens and the angels that hover, for the safekeeping of everyone involved. I bet that Adam's best buddy will have a great sense of things that she will tell you once in person. I know that several kids that Erica hung with were in near misses in a few different types of calamities, and each time they would call and tell me that ERz was there to make sure of them. I do believe them. Thank you our Angels.

Marcia, oh my, you really did your leg some harm. I will send extra big hugs and prayers now in hopes that you will begin to mend right away. Poor Girl.

Peace

[shorty16]

Rohan's Mom,

Your post about the marker brought back a memory.

The city we live in asked us if we wanted to purchase memorial trees (3) to plant in the area where Brian died.  Our family chose not to purchase items for where Brian died, but to purchase items about how Brian lived:  All with memorial money, we purchased: 4 lannon-stone benches for the senior HS gift and lannon-stone table/bench set for Sunburst ski area. Brian was an avid snow-boarder.

These are places where Brian lived, not the one place where he died.

Your post sounded like you were sad you did not purchase a marker for that one area, when we all know you honor Rohan everywhere - everyday.

Colleen, Brian's Mother Forever

 

[ericasmom]

Great ideas Colleen. My kids both are/were snowboarders as well.

Shelly, I am sorry that you felt so alone today, that your husband did not feel the weight of your heart. Parents often grieve differently from one another. I just hope that he is able to honor the ache you have, to not expect it to just be gone. You are a very busy young Mom, homeschooling and taking on a new adoption, so I hope that you are able to have some alone time each week that allows you time for your grief and your rejuvination.

Love,

dee

[mikesmomrs]

Dee:  I am so glad that all the kids at least got to do the parade inside...I know they would have been so disappointed had they not been able to have it at all...sounds like it went very well, and especially your sweet Eri "dropping by." 

I guess little Damon won't get to go Trick or Treating tonight...(Saturday)...I went over there today to drop off his goodies from us, and he wanted to open the door and show us his costume (we weren't going to go in because of the chance of hubby's catching some of those horrid germs and their playing havoc with his lung disorder...)  Anyway, Damon was so excited to get his goodies, but while he was showign us his costume, (he has a Boba Fett from Star Wars costume), I could see that his eyes were all red-rimmed and his little voice sounded so hoarse.   Sarah did sound better, but Damon actually looked like he might still have a fever.  I wanted so much to just reach out and hug him all better, but I couldn't even touch him!  Poor little guy.

Terrie:  Glad to hear that hubby's surgery went well...I hope he is on the mend soon, for his sake, and for yours!  So sorry to hear of your friend's involvement with hitting the dear, but glad to hear that everyone is okay...

Marcia:  Wow, that is some mess of your leg/ankle...man, no wonder you are having so much pain...take care my friend, and do keep it elevated...it is the best thing, but I am sure you know that...

love and peace,  carol  mikesmomrs

[mysonrich]

Remembering Dan on this day..here,there and everywhere.

[shorty16]

my BI friends

It is early here and I am awake!!!!

Go figure, I want to sleep in on weekdays and wake up early on week ends.

Love the sparkly stars Rich's Mom

Colleen

[heartbeataway]

Betsey,

Love the picture!

Happy Birthday Danny ....... I may be a day late ...... if I am I  apologize. If your family is like others.  The celebration is not one day but many ....... ;-)

Carol,

I sure hope Damon is better soon.  I know it has to be hard for you to want to reach out but not wanting to expose your husband to anything that could be dangerous to his health.

Have a good weekend everyone!

Bonnie, Jason's Mom

[lostwoher]

 HaPPy HaLLowEEn!! Be safe and have fun. I dont have any pictures on the laptop from halloween past but I do remember Kayla being dressed up as a ballerina one year. It was very cold and snowing but she insisted that she go trick or treating and would keep her coat on- yeah right.

It has been extremely hectic at work this past month and so much heaviness on my mind so I havent posted much. Trying to gear up for the upcoming holidays. I just have to figure out new traditions. I want the 'old' traditions so badly but that just isnt going to happen.

SO MANY happenings here that there is no way I can reply to them all but it sure lifts my spirits to read about you all. New baby, memories of the good times, celebrations.. and dear Marcia and her 'dirt bike' mishap ( no, that didnt lift my spirits but Lorri's side of it sure did). The heartfelt banners that were made were definately made from love.

Thinking of you all everyday even when Im not here. I even felt the group hug!

Take care ALL,

Lynn

[heartbeataway]

Lynn,

Received Kayla's banner flag .....  very cool!

It is now boxed with all the other banners waiting for the next event.  Thank you so much for participating!

 

[lostwoher]

 Thank YOU so much Bonnie for posting the pictures of it. I really appreciate the one you made for her. I know for a fact she loved the bright green. She always likes to be seen haha.

 We will be making another trip tomorrow in hopes that the headstone is in place. The rain has been delaying it for 3 weeks now . 

[ericasmom]

LYNN< beautiful banner, Kayla will fly alongside, as we are heart in heart here, our angels are gathered as well.

Carol, so hoping that Damon gets better with each hour. I know that it must have been tough to not be able to hold him to you.

Betsy, love your graphics.

[ericasmom]

Happy Birthday DANNY, may you fly sweetly through the skies, leaving a trail of sparkle for your Mom to see.

You are Peaceful and Dear,

dee

[nicksdad]

Wife made it...

[hotsauce]

Good morning to everyone here at BI.  want to wish everyone a Happy Halloween.

if going to any parties please be safe and have fun. be careful with the kids goind treat or treating.

 

want to wish DANNY a happy birthday.   BESTY,  i hope he sends you a lot of loving signs.

 

GREG, thank you for the group hug.  it's been a while since i had one.

 

to EVERYONE, have a great weekend.

 

missing BRIAN,  more and more each day.

 

hugs to ALL

mary ann

Brian's momdukes

[hotrod]

                Happy Birthday Danny

May your light shine on your family today and memories of your beautiful smile bring them joy.

 

Betsy   Such a wonderful picture!!!! It made me happy to see it.

 

Lynn    Kayla's flag is beautiful.  I do hope that the stone is in place when you get to make the trip.

 

Dan     Loved the Halloween picture

Marcia  I do hope your injury is beginning to feel better and that rapid healing is taking place. 

 

I tried to go through my pictures to capture a Halloween costume snap of Stephen but it became too painful so I had to stop and will enjoy those that each of you post

 

Dee , Carol, Terrie, Lori , Bonnie , Kathy, Claudia, Mary Ann, Colleen and Greg  stay well

Happy Trick or Treating

 

Betty

 

Stephen'sMom:)

[arc4ever]

Happy Birthday to DANNY!  Such a precious gift, may you shine extra brightly today.  Hope our angels are throwing you a big party.

Love Terrie (Adams' mom)

[shorty16]

Danny, age 19

Kenny &

dannysmomma

diabetic Ketoacidosis

4/10/1989

3/29/2008

Maryland

I know I am lossing my mind.

Is this the Danny we are wishing happy birthday?

My information must be incorrect, Please help

Colleen

 

[nicksdad]

[mysonrich]

Hi everyone, I haven't had much to say lately, believe it or not. Thanks for admiring the graphics. I just copy them from the web when they aren't copy right protected. Its the kid in me.

 

Lorri, I hear you and am listening and am sorry if words fail me at times.

Carol, I don;t get the network here for the games but I do watch any video I can locate and yes, the catches were amazing. Hope they keep it up.

Betty, thinking of you and your most likely loyalty to the Evil Empire.

 

I did keep my appointment with the grief counselor. Unfortunately, she does get it. Her 21 year old son died 5 years ago in an accident. SO, she told me I have to be careful of the area of my mind that she referred to as the coo coo area. I laughed because the reel in my mind, our minds that say, ' what if, why didn't I, how come, " is the thought process that makes my mind whirl and raises my BP as I feel anger and grief at many things as those feelings again  creep up on me.

 

This Halloween I am reminded of something that Rich;s g/f said right after he died. She told me that after they left my daughters Halloween party and while driving down the road, Rich opened the sunrooof and yelled at the world.She told me that the way he was yelling was unnerving? reason to give her thought and remember it? Did some of our kids know in the core of their being that time was short? Guess we won;t know that now. My first thought was that he drank too much. After playing CSI detective yet again, i learned he had not. It was something primal that night.

 

As I head into the many of the " Firsts", i want to say I am glad that you all are here.

 

Love you Bubba

Betsy,mysonRich

[shorty16]

It is very cold and windy in WI.

I went to buy last-minute pumpkins and they are really morphed.  Lukas (my nephew), Aaron and Chris (my sister) will have to use their imagination with these!!!

Since my way of dealing with Christmas is running away, Scott and I booked a 12-23 to 12-27 trip to Universal Studios in Hollywood CA.  Just Scott, Colleen, Michelle, and Aaron.  We will bring a little bit of Brian and spread him in the Pacific Ocean.

Send warm thoughts to the trick-or-treaters tonight in WI.

Colleen, Brian's Mother Forever

[mysonrich]

Colleen, I'll admit I lost my mind and I thought Greg said it was mamabets Dan????

[shellbellsmom]

So many angel birthdays today.  Happy Birthday Danny.  Happy Birthday to my Grandma Dorothy who is spending the day with my Michelle and celebrating up in heaven.   Happy Birthday also to a dear friends son Caleb who died at age of 5 in March of 2005.  Wishing them all a heavenly birthday today.

It’s been a good weekend so far.  Last night the husband and my son just spent the night together with me watching a movie and eating pizza. This morning breakfast together and craving and decorating pumpkins all together.  This doesn’t happen much….especially since my 22 year old son is usually hanging out with his friends rather than mom and dad.  All that is missing is our Michelle. 

Wishing everyone here on BI a very Happy Halloween.  Cherish the memories we have of our children…

[shellbellsmom]

Here is a picture of my Michelle on Halloween many years ago. Remembering good memories and trying to have a good day. 

[nicksdad]

[user=27668]mysonrich[/user] wrote:

Colleen, I'll admit I lost my mind and I thought Greg said it was mamabets Dan????

I went by the link Greg put so I am hoping I did it right..

[hotsauce]

hey BI friends, just wanted to let you all know i got a halloween balloon for BRIAN and wrote all over it and let it go.  so if it comes your way you know it came from me. :?

mary ann

Brian's momdukes

[shorty16]

Betsey

Brian told one of his friends that he probably would not live to see twenty.  Brian knew he was an adrenaline-junkie.

Your post brought up the thought, that Brian knew he could die doing the things he was doing

I could (and do not want to) imagine what else he did

Colleen

[daveydow1]

HAPPY HEAVENLY BIRTHDAY, DANNY PALLICK. 

MAMABETS,....You are in my thoughts & prayers on this

day, and may your many memories of your dear son, Danny,

warm your heart & bring you comfort.

       Daveysmom,  Sherry  

[hotrod]

Hi Colleen and Betsy,

Stephen was a risk taker and rule breaker from the time he could walk. 

 I worried about him and his safety constantly and  prayed for him daily.   I was afraid that with his carefree attitude and love for the adrenaline high that he would not live a long life.  He would alwasy say he was an OLD Soul and not to worry about him

I am grateful for the time that I did have him in my life and I must say it was never dull.

Sherry so nice to see Davey's smile

Betty

Stephen'smom 

 

[mpsmom]

MaryAnn, I pick up balloons at various places and write on them and send up to my girl.  It makes me feel good, I will watch for Brians balloon out here in Nevada.   I think the last time we were at Panda Express ( a fast food chinese restraunt) they had balloons tied on all the chairs, I asked the manager if I could have one, So I took a big yellow one home and wrote Bethany a note and let it go.  Whatever works for the moment. 

Today is the first day that my ankle pain is actually tolerable..YEAH!!!!!!!  still cannot do anything but at least not the intense pain when I move my leg or foot.  Larry went to a sporting good store for me yesterday and bought me some lightweight jogging style pants, so now at least I can put clothes on.... not that I can go anywhere.. LOL.... 

We have had several N1H1 deaths out here in my part of the country , please please please everyone be safe and stay away from sick people and use hand sanitizer ALOT !!!!   We arwe out of vacinations here in Vegas area, waiting for more to come in so Larry and I can both get them, we have patients who come in to see him no matter how sick they are.... I dont want Larry to get sick and I can imagine being sick with no mobility like I am right now..

The weather is beautiful here today, in the high 70's and the sun is shining, Larry just went in to Bethanys room to feed her fish and said he thought she was here, he smelled her perfume as soon as he opened her door, I havent been in her room since Monday as it is just to difficult to navigate with my walker, Made me smile to think she is here with me, although I am certain she is laughing at me hopping around on one foot.  That is who she was/is ...

Hugs to everyone , Marcia  Bethanys Mom Forever

[summergirl]

Hello to all - I can't believe I do not come on for one night and there are 4 pages of posts!!!!!  Catch up as I can.

Last night was a tough night. My friend Linda and I went to Fiddler's Cove, the restaurant where my Jessica had dinner her last night on this earth, the place where she took her last breath. Last night was the final night as they have sold the business and are moving on. Linda bought beautiful yellow roses which we put in the bathroom along with a pic of Tavian and a note from each of us.  It was so hard being in the last place Jessica was but there were so many of her friends there that I got to see and talk to, many memories, tears and laughter.  It is another phase in my daughter's passing that I have to face and keep the good memories and leave the hard one's behind.    I stood in that bathroom thinking of my Jessica lying there with no one knowing that her body was there but here spirit had left this earth. I pictured her friends knocking on the door, no answer, looking under the door and seeing her beautiful long hair, breaking the door down to find her gone.  I looked in the mirror there and wondered what she had been doing before her loving heart stopped so suddenly, said my good by and walked out.  JESSICA JESSICA JESSICA.

HAPPY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAN - YOU SHINE BRIGHT AMONG THE HEAVEN'S. 

It is Halloween today and my precious Tavian is with his Grandma and the girls. I will close the blinds, turn off the lights and have a quiet night. It is a warm day today, cloudy and windy with rain coming in and then much colder the rest of the week - winter is approaching.

Marcia - wow a broken leg and foot - that has got too hurt. hang in there girl and rest, before you know it you will be back and hiking again!!!

I have pics of Jessica in her halloween costumes but they are packed away and I cannot remember where I packed them - so many boxes. I will try to find them.

So tired today, need some rest. Love to all - Kathy

[mpsmom]

Bethany as a black widow spider  ... this must be when she was about 11 or 12.   This costume was actually one that I wore in my early 20's... I was tiny and it fit a little bit different on me.... but we made it over for her... she loved moving the 'legs' around...

Hugs, Marcia  

[mpsmom]

One of my favorite costumes of all, Princess Jasmine from Alladin, I still have the scarves with the coins hand sewn on it.... I think they are hanging up in her closet.  She is 5 1/2 in this picture, we lived in Portland Oregon at the time, Larry was in Chiropractic College up there.    Halloween was always a big deal around our house.... I miss my baby girl so much....

Hugs and Happy Halloween to all,   Marcia  Bethanys Mom Forever

[lolynbo]

.  I looked in the mirror there and wondered what she had been doing before her loving heart stopped so suddenly, said my good by and walked out.  JESSICA JESSICA JESSICA.

WOW...HOW SAD KATHY IM SO SORRY, I DONT NO HOW YOU WENT AND DID IT..IVE BEEN FEELING LIKE I NEED TO GO TO THE HOSP(S) AND NURSING HOMES TOO...I GUESS ITS JUST CUZ ITS THAT TIME OF YR..

IM FEELING YOUR PAIN KATHY...I TRUELY THINK THINK SHE PROB LOOKED IN THE MIRROR AND THOUGHT..."WONDER WHAT MOM AND TAVIAN ARE DOING, I FEEL GOOD KNOWING HE IS SAFE WITH HIS GRANNY., AND DANG MY HAIR LOOKS HOTT"...IF ITS ANYTHING LIKE I SAW WHEN KOURTNEY PASSED...SHE WAS MORE PEACEFUL AND BEAUTIFUL THNE YOUVE EVER SEEN HER..I PROMIS YOU THAT....KOURTNEY WAS BEYOND WORDS OF BEAUTY.....ALL OF OUR ANGELS WERE...

BETHANY...LOVE THE PICS...SUCH A PRETTY PRINCESS...LOOK AT ALL THE TOYS BEHIND HER...A CHILD FULL OF LOVE AND A LOVING FAMILY...WHAT A LUCKY LITTLE GIRL...