Lost my brother (trauma warning)

[NotSally]

I lost my brother two weeks ago to what was likely a heart attack at 42 which I've pretty much confirmed with his phone's google searches the day he died. There were also alcohol and drugs present which I'm sure didn't help the situation. The extra traumatic part of this situation is he was found in his apartment two weeks after he died. My parents were in shock so I dealt with the landlord, police and cleaning company. I had to be involved in extremely detailed discussions about what happens to a body and an apartment after two weeks. I also had to pick up items and enter into the apartment after his body was removed. I'm experiencing trauma after being exposed to the smells and the reality of the condition of the apartment. 

I realize that my story may trigger trauma in others that read this and I'm so sorry. I'm looking for a resource where I can talk about the details and my grieving process. I was really close with him and feel lost without him. The extra complicated details of his death are the hardest part for me to deal with. I have phantom smells of the room and vivid images I can't erase from my mind. If anyone has a specific resource to point me to get through this I would appreciate it. I just don't really know where to start.

[reader]

Dear Sally,

I am so sorry for your loss.  My deepest sympathies and condolences. I hope these websites will provide you additional supports. Thinking of you.

What's Your Grief

Grief in Common

Grief Share

Grief Healing Blog

Grief Recovery Method

https://www.griefandsympathy.com/

https://www.cruse.org.uk/get-help/traumatic-bereavement/traumatic-loss