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New to this site and need divorce advice

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To cut long story short - my marriage sucks. We have beeт together through a loss, he cheated on me with my colleague and I forgave him at least I thought so. I don't feel like I can trust him, we don't communicate much and he keeps trying to restore our relationship, but I realize that I am not into him. I don't want to be married, we have no children and now I am in my late 30th so I want to travel and continue my career. I am planning to move out to another state and want to file online divorce because I am legally trained and believe that I could do it by myself. Still, when it comes to an action, I am totally scared. I think about my husband and believe that there is still a chance. However when he returns from work I feel literary miserable and can't stand being in the same room. Perhaps there is somebody who went through the same... What do you think?

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