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Christy Fraser

Lost my boyfriend to drugs

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I r ecently lost my boyfriend to a drug overdose. The last few months of our relationship was rocky, one day he loved me the next day he wanted nothing to do with me. He would even tell me that. I never knew how he truly felt. I almost left him days before his overdose, he cried and told me he loved me and didn't want me to leave him. I feel Foolish like I held on to someone who didn't love me. And maybe I drove him to drugs. I miss him so much. And my heart is broken in so many different ways.

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:huh: :huh: :huh:

Dear Christy!

 

I´m a new member  too.I´m on here because of the loss of my beloved man.It happened 3 years ago,but it still hurts more than words can say and I look for those knowing what I´ve been going through more than 1000 days and nights without him.My beloved Jan died so suddenly that it was a horrible change from morning till night and remembering it feels like "yesterday".My whole world has knocked down,because I lost my "everything" in 18 hours,so I´ve never felt such a big pain as I´ve been feeling by now.I understand how hard it must be for you as one of my close friends died as well as your boyfriend when I was 19 y.o.It´s long ago,but I remember how it felt at that moment.I also lost my father seeing him to die from a cancer.Believe me,I understand you very well.Since my beloved man Jan died each day is like a glass full of immense sorrow.I´ve only learned living with my pain day after day.It hurts and always will until I meet my love again.You can read my story I posted on the board of The loss of a partner yesterday.If your beloved boyfriend told you that he loved you,it must be true.I believe it can be a comfort for you.Fortunately having my best friends can help me as much as possible,being a support for me by now.The last Christmas I met a very kind priest that has helped me like nobody else.God is my biggest help.I hope you have somebody close to you helping you as much as needed right now and you can be sure I´m here for you too.You can write me whenever you need to talk to.

 

Janka

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Christy,

 

I read your post and thought of my daughter.  She is a drug addict, been on drugs for  20 plus years, as the years went on the drugs got stronger.  The hold they take on a person gets stronger.  My daughter used to call me up and basically tell me to go to hell, and turn around and tell me she loved me and her children.  Then she would top it all off with she would disappear and I wouldn't see her any more.  I got so I was so afraid to answer the phone because they would tell me my daughter had overdosed.  By the grace of God, she cleaned herself up and told me a lot about a drug addict.  They are in a hell, where they know they are hurting the people they love, but the drugs don't let them stop.  Where we tell them good things, the drugs tell them bad things.  I guess what I want to say is don't feel foolish, I believe that he loved you, I just know that drug abuse is a terrible thing, and hurts a lot of people, not just the ones who use.  I am really sorry, that he lost his fight to the drug.  It is sad beyond words.  But never question yourself, if anything you loved and you loved hard, .you tried so hard to hang in there, you didn't drive him to drugs, it was his doing, a battle he had to fight and you were powerless, cause sadly love doesn't always make everything ok.  I hope you find peace Christy, you did what you could and that was all the power you had, the addict needs to find the power for themselves.  Bless you

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