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Lost my beloved Phantom kitty last Wednesday to cancer. He was 11...he was my best friend. I feel so lost...he was my boy...I keep thinking I'm feeling better but then it hits me from behind and leaves me in tears...I need people to listen and talk to...

Phantom3.jpg

Phantom5.jpg

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Justin,

What endearing pictures of you and your sweet cat. Time will help you heal; you can't rush through the grieving period. You'll have just ok days...and then, some bad ones but you WILL emerge with the happiest of memories and move on. 

XO

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He was my best buddy...he followed me everywhere. I've just drifted through the last 72 hours...I feel silly...part of me thinks I should be already moving on...but I know it's just been three days. This is some of the deepest, most raw pain I ever walked through...with no end in sight...I don't regret the decision to set him free...in his last hour he was suffering and so I made the most loving decision for him I could...I ended his suffering...he couldn't eat...couldn't drink...vomiting buckets of bile...so I set him free. But I miss my boy...so much...

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Justin, your kitty looks like such a wonderful friend and companion. I am so sorry that you had to spare him anymore suffering but it really seems you did the most gracious of acts. Cancer is so ugly and can be so painful. I am also so glad for you that you knew this was the right decision for him. I envy the comfort you have knowing it was right and the right time. Hopefully your grief will start to get better soon. It's difficult to look around the home you shared and seeing all those special moments everywhere you look isn't it. I am having that as well and it's been 4 days for me. Sending you lots of hugs. The bonds we have with our little furry friends is very unique and will take a random amout of time to deal with. 

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Justin you are not alone, I have experienced loss of a cat in the last few days and the pain is almost unbearable. Just when you feel you are ok for a while something hits you and you feel it again. I think it's a normal process although I have no idea what is normal and people grieve in their own way, no right or wrong. But we all feel that agonising physical pain of loss that hurts as much mentally as well as physically. From previous experience time is the only thing that makes things feel better, not words from others and sometimes kind words are the most difficult to hear. But as I said you are most definitely not alone. I'm new here and the level of understanding I feel from others has been overwhelming. Nothing helps with the pain but knowing you can talk to people who 'get' what you are going through really is a lifeline. 

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Justin,

I am so so sorry.  You did the best thing you could to spare your cat from pain, but I know that feels of little consolation right now while you're missing him.  I lost a cat to cancer once, it's very hard.  I, too,  had him put to sleep to spare him any more suffering, he'd already suffered more than he should have.

It takes time for us to adjust to their not being there, and even then we miss them, they're part of our hearts always and continue to exist in our hearts and memories.

 

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I feel your pain man, I had to put my Callie down Friday she was almost 19, I’m devastated....she had a long a great life but it doesn’t help the pain 

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Aww love Phantom, what a sweetie. I am so so sorry. We lost our cat 5 months ago. It's been very hard. Not to say things won't get get better, they do.

But when you have a loss like this, the bond that you had, it is a big shock and a life change. I really understood all the cute rituals we had with our cat when we lost him. How totally interwoven he was in every aspect of our day. We don't have kids together, so he was our child.  

I am glad you came here and shared a little. Maybe read some of the other posts, you will see you are definitely not alone. And you are right, the grief comes in waves. Hope you are doing okay. 

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One day at a time...thought I was doing okay until treat time came and while my wife fed our two girls, I went to get Phantom's bowl...and just realized what I was doing...and I broke down. I miss my boy...so much it hurts physically at times. It will get better...but right now it's a long road...a very long road...new meaning to "Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death". I'm walking through that valley right now...I'm so sorry for everyone who has lost their kitties...I can't imagine anyone else feeling like this.

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11 hours ago, Justin2018 said:

One day at a time...thought I was doing okay until treat time came and while my wife fed our two girls, I went to get Phantom's bowl...and just realized what I was doing...and I broke down. I miss my boy...so much it hurts physically at times. It will get better...but right now it's a long road...a very long road...new meaning to "Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death". I'm walking through that valley right now...I'm so sorry for everyone who has lost their kitties..

Quote

.I can't imagine anyone else feeling like this.

I feel like this and so do lots on here, you are not on your own and there are many of us that feel the same pain and excruciating sadness in our own ways. It has helped me to come on here and share, however I'm feeling at the time. It often seems to be food time that hurts the most? I have mentioned (a lot, I know!) how greedy my gorgeous Bertie was and it's meal times that get me the worst. Seeing the space he ate now empty. No bowl, no begging. Seeing his food packed away in the cupboard no longer needed.

Food time is such a basic ritual we all do with our pets, we all have the routine don't we and it often intensifies closer to losing them if we are struggling to get them to eat. The normality of those regular feeding times is what they enjoy and I have to admit I love to watch my cats eat, it makes me so happy.

Take your time and keep sharing on here Justin. I didn't think much could help me apart from time but I've found a lot of comfort, understanding & kindness on here and I hope you find that too.

 

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It is those things we are used to doing that are so hard when they're gone.  They're ingrained in us, and it's a constant trigger for our grief.  Just as my going to bed without my Miss Mocha.  It was so hard to get used to sleeping without her pushing up against me.  :(

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I just lost my Smokey Thursday evening. I'm sick with sadness and heartbroken I still can't believe he is gone. I know your pain Smokey was 18 and always with me. I'm here if you need to talk 

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