Feeling disconnected from my father after his passing

[kt23]

I'm 20, my dad died suddenly about 5 months ago now. When it happened I think i repressed most of my feelings just trying not to think about it and putting on a brave face for my mum and sister. I still felt like he was with me until recently, now I feel like he's really gone.

Will the connection ever come back, or can I get it back? I miss him more than anything and I just feel like it's somehow my fault we got disconnected and because I don't feel him anymore, it almost feels like he's distant and i've upset him somehow?

That must sound crazy, I hope someone understands

much love

[reader]

Dear kt23,

I'm very sorry for your loss.  Although our dads are not physically still here on this earth, please know we will always be connected. We are all half our mum and dads. Your dad will always be in your heart and your memories. There are ways to maintain a strong connection. And sometimes we have to create new rituals to honor our dad's memory. Take the time to look through photographs, read his favorite books, watch his favorite TV shows or eat his favorite foods. Write him a letter. Visit his grave site. Think about how proud of he must have been of you and your sister. I sometimes still like to talk as if my dad is sitting in the room with me.

I know its hard. Keep surrounding yourself with loving friends and family.  And keep taking it day by day. And if you want to, consider talking to a grief counselor or joining a support group. Sometimes it helps to be around other people who understand our loss.

Thinking of you. Sending all my thoughts and prayers.