Cannot cope after 3 years and need answers to a question

[Missing my Moma]

Well I've had a hard time finding a way to move on with my life despite my blessings of a wonderful family of my own (husband and 3 beautiful children). My mommy passed away Mother's Day of 2013. (I need to change the date on my profile. I don't know what I was thinking) but she was my everything. She lived a block from me the first 6 years of my marriage. She had falicular lymphoma and fought so hard for 10 years. I was there every step of the way. I'd take her to her dr appointments and administer her meds and be at her beck n call. She was my best friend. Now I've realized my only friend (other than my husband). So here's the most recent problem. My brothers new girlfriend (of about 7 months) has just asked for my moms broccoli casserole recipe so she can make it for my brother. Something inside of me does not want to give it to her. Not to mention it's not like we hang out every day or even once for that matter. Please someone tell me what I should do. I don't want her to think I'm this awful whiny baby who's just being a witch. But I feel that things like those recipes are just a couple of things I have between she and I that are left. I'm sure mommy would have gave it to her but she's not here to do that. Please help me. 

[ModKonnie]

Missing my Moma,

I am very sorry about the loss of your mom. I'm going to be perfectly honest and say I feel like you are not being fair to your brother. I know your mother was your best friend, but your brother is also apart of your family. He deserves a small part of your mom, don't  you think? It's a beloved recipe. It's going to make him happy, and he will be able to remember her with fondness. The more people that share your recipe, the more your mom is remember. 

That's how I see it. But I am no expert, nor am I perfect. 

ModKonnie

[Pittiemama29]

Dont give her the original make a copy of it for her.

[reader]

Dear Missing My Moma,

I'm so sorry for your loss. Its always hard to share those special recipes or items from your beloved mother with another person. A new person, but in some ways this is another opportunity to continue your mother's legacy. If your brother ends up marrying her, maybe she will pass this special recipe onto their children. I know its hard. Do what you think is best and most comfortable with. Thinking of you. Big hugs.

[YoWooYa]

You're of course entitled to feel however you're feeling.  My Mama had recipes that are very special to me, too.  For myself, I like the idea that her recipes will live on and be enjoyed by others.  That way, this piece of her keeps going. 

My Mama always made me feel like she was giving me 1000%.  I had no idea that she could be brightening other peoples' lives because she spent every waking moment trying to make my life better in some way--picking up something she thought I needed, researching some issue I'd been having, or just emailing me and telling me how much she loved me.  But after she passed, I was surprised by how many people came up to me to say how she had brightened their lives, too.  So, I learned that my mama's magic was infinite.  In that way, the more people who enjoy her recipes, the bigger her legacy is.  

Maybe this way of thinking could help you, too.  Or not.  We're all with you either way.