Music and our moods in a time of loss

[silverkitties]

I was inspired to start this thread by one of MSN's posts when she quoted from Carrie Underwood's "See you again." 

 

For some, if not many of us, music has long served as markers for stages in our lives and our various moods. Personal losses can  change the way we feel about the music we've listened to over the years. Sometimes songs we never liked begin to register for us in a new way while old favorites acquire new meanings or become enhanced. 

 

There are also new (or old) songs we discover that hit the spot so exactly. 

 

What songs have struck you these days? 

 

I'm going to post a favorite from 1977: Electric Light Orchestra's "Shangri-La." I have liked it ever since I first heard it at the age of 14--particularly the wonderful ending, a unique fusion of rock and classical.  Listening to it nearly 40 years later, I am struck all the more by its sheer beauty and how it captures that sense of melancholy and grief now that I'm feeling--even if this is meant to be a song about lost love.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aE3YKdL5YG8

 

What's the use of changing things,
Wonder what tomorrow brings,
Who knows,
I'm getting out of love.

My Shangri-la has gone away,
Faded like the Beatles on Hey Jude
She seemed to drift out on the rain
That came in somewhere softly from the blue

The next verse really gets to me as I think of the day she died--as it was overcast and began to pour soon after she passed. 

Clouds roll by and hide the sun,
Raindrops fall on everyone,
So sad,
I'm getting out of love.

Where is my Shnagri-la?

The last 2 minutes are out of the world--I will return to Shangri-la.

 

 

[silverkitties]

Here's another--Natalie Cole's remake of her then deceased dad's famous hit, "Unforgettable." When I first heard it, I found it remarkably clever in its weaving of voices and now I appreciate it all the more. (Note: this song now reminds me of Missionblue and her dad, with their love for classic films.)

 

Here it is in concert:

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PdBKXdc4dgw

 

 

Unforgettable
That's what you are
Unforgettable
Tho' near or far
Like a song of love that clings to me
How the thought of you does things to me
Never before has someone been more
Unforgettable in every way
And forever more, that's how you'll stay
That's why darling it's incredible
That someone so unforgettable
Thinks that I am unforgettable too

Unforgettable in every way
And forever more, that's how you'll stay
That's why darling it's incredible
That someone so unforgettable
Thinks that I am unforgettable too

[mariesgirl1953]

.

[mariesgirl1953]

Bette Midler

the wind beneath my wings

The Rose

These are my mam's favorite songs and also from a distance

[mariesgirl1953]

And also by Bette Midler

From a distance

And I also listen to in the arms of an angel by Sarah McLoughlan I'm not sure if my mam has ever heard this song but the words are so beautiful and really powerful

In the arms of an angel - Sarah McLoughlan

[silverkitties]

Marie, just the other day, I was thinking of that Sarah Mclachlan song too--Angel! Thank you for posting that. There's something about it that is so calm yet sad.

 

I like Bette Midler's "From a Distance." I can still remember hearing if for about the first time around the week when my mom left for Taiwan and my first cat--a long-haired torbie--died.  

[Marivdb]

For me I'll never be able to listen to Karen Carpenter sing Rainy Days And Monday's again. I grew up listening and singing along to Karen with my mom...and that song just fits my mood since she's been gone.

Talkin' to myself and feelin' old

Sometimes I'd like to quit

Nothin' ever seems to fit

Hangin' around

Nothin' to do but frown

Rainy days and Monday's always get me down.

What I've got they used to call the blues

Nothin' is really wrong

Feelin' like I don't belong

Walkin' around

Some kind of lonely clown

Rainy days and Monday's always get m down

You get the picture................

[mariesgirl1953]

Your welcome Silverkitty ☺

[mariesgirl1953]

*sorry silverkitties ☺☺

[silverkitties]

Marivdb, "Rainy Days" brings back so many memories of my youth in the Bronx. But the song that really gets to me is "Superstar." For some reason, it already struck me as a melancholy song when I was 8--the first time I heard it. It's a song I also tend to associate with rainy days at home, with memories of my mom cooking in the next room as I read played with my dolls or read.  Listening to it more than 40 years later--after the passing of my mom--brings back such inexpressible sadness.

 

Another song that gets to me too is the Moody Blues "Nights in White Satin." It's a mournful song that I associate with the time when my mom was away from me for an extended period as she got surgery. And now, my mom is not returning:(

 

The one that really gets to me now, tho', is Roberta Flack's "The First Time": I associate it w/ the same occasion....I remember not liking it too much at that time since I was 9. Yet, over the years, I came to find the song extremely moving--so serene, yet sad. There's something about it that is almost like a lullaby.   I remember wanting to listen to it sometime after my mom's memorial service and I just cried and cried, remembering my memories of my mom then and now.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fmpSWlVdKmo

 

And of course, there's the Beatles' "Long and Winding Road." I remember the day I walked to the vet's knowing that my first cat would be put to sleep the day after they told me that her breast cancer which had returned after her surgery 2 years earlier had returned. When I walked in, the radio happened to be playing that song and I broke down right there. 

 

"Bridge over Troubled Waters" makes me want to cry more than ever: but it has also grown more beautiful and wonderful to me. What a work of genius.  

[silverkitties]

As for the 80s, I love Taylor Dayne's "Love will lead you back." This is another song that I've long associated with one of my mom's departures to Taiwan.  Again, it's doubly sad to me knowing she won't ever be returning this time. 

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hZ1qLW2WBZk
 

Love will lead you back
Someday I just know that
Love will lead you back to my arms
Where you belong

I'm sure, sure as stars are shining
One day you will find me again
It won't be long
One of these days our love will lead you back

One of these nights
Well I'll hear your voice again
You're gonna say, oh how much you missed me
You'll walk out this door
But someday you'll walk back in
Darling I know, I know this will be

 

 

 

There's Whitney Houston's "Run to You."  This song didn't use to make me sad, but now the following verse really gets to me now: 

 

Each day, each day I play the role
Of someone always in control
But at night I come home and turn the key
There's nobody there, no one cares for me
What's the sense of trying hard to find your dreams
Without someone to share it with
Tell me what does it mean?

I wanna run to you (oooh)
Won't you hold me in your arms
And keep me safe from harm
I want to run to you (oooh)
But if I come to you (oooh)
Tell me, will you stay or will you run away

[ikaros]

Wow. Yep, I got feels over the songs you guys suggested. Forgive my silliness, being flippant helps me cope sometimes.

 

Oldies. Those make me cry. I love every style of music. But my mom and I used to listen to the Oldies. When she died there were several that sent me over the edge, not the least of which was one of my favorites, 16 Candles. It's not even about dying or loss of love.  But something in the gentle longing makes me cry every time.

 

Also, Skeeter Davis singing The End of the World... It's really a simple little song but gets me all the time.

 

https://youtu.be/Qgcy-V6YIuI

 

 

Sometimes I'd find one that would just make me laugh through the tears, like Fats Domino's Ain't That A Shame, it's so catchy and fun but still seemed relatable to my mom's passing. I think she would have laughed with me.

 

I'm having a hard time copying youtube links.

 

But I would say I have three songs that make me cry about my mom even when they are seemingly unrelated by subject matter and they are:

 

Jeff Buckley's "Hallelujah" Talented Jeff who walked into a river and never made it out.

 

Iron & Wine's "Flightless Bird American Mouth"

 

 

Modern Jukebox's Oldies style cover of Radiohead's "Creep"

[silverkitties]

ikaros, being flippant helps me too!

 

Sometimes, that's all you can do to keep yourself sane--to see the crazy, zany, loony in everything. 

 

I honestly did not know that song by Skeeter Davis "The End of the World":  I have long wondered about it and now I know! I can see why you think 16 candles sounds melancholy too. 

 

I am not as familiar with the Jeff Buckley song....I somehow remember that you rewrote it sometime ago here? It is wistful--and I understand how you reinterpreted it.