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Mother passed last month


pink

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I don't even begin to know what to tell you. I lost my mother last month. It was awful to see her look so fragile in ICU. She was so sick. I don't know how much she understood about what was going on. She was on a ventilator for a week. Her blood pressure was extremely low. Her heart wasn't in rhythm. She had sepsis from a perforated bowel.

After a week of watching her struggle, my bother and my sisters made the decision to let her go.

Ever since she passed, I have been grieving "normally." Today, I lost it. I feel so down, I cried earlier. I just miss her so much. She was a part of my every day life and suddenly she's gone. She was 84 but that didn't make it any easier.

I feel rather lost and not sure what I am supposed to be feeling. :(

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Pink. I'm  so sorry for your loss. It's truly devastating to lose a parent. The void that follows can be unbearable. One month is so fresh and what you are feeling is normal. It's been nine months since I lost my mum and I still feel completely lost and alone. This forum has been my support and all the wonderful people here. 

Hugs 

Lisa 

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Welcome Pink! I'm so sorry for your loss. It's never easy to lose a loved one. I lost my mom and it's been 13 months and it feels like it just happened. I know the feeling you're going through and it's normal. Everyone grieves differently. When mom passed from a massive stroke at 86, it seemed so unreal....like a dream. It hit me when I was returning home from hospice. Going back home where mom was not going to be there. Not in her room where I once shared with her.

For many years, I slept with mom. I wasn't going to feel her next to me anymore. I won't be helping mom anymore. Damn it! I miss it. I was her main caretaker. I did everything for mom. I just want my mom back. 

Pink, it's still very fresh for you. Cry and just let it out. Grieve the way you want to and just don't let anybody tell you to "get over it". There is no right or wrong time frame of grieving. Please come here and share your thoughts or vent. We have a wonderful group of people here. We are very understanding. We are here for you.

Love and Hugs

May

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Thank you both so much for your posts.

 

I actually feel worse now than I did right after she died. I'm not crying near as much but I am just not myself. I don't want to see anyone, talk to anyone and would rather just stay home and not leave the house.

 

I feel like no one understands, not even my adult daughter who went through losing my mom right alone with me.

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Pink, your welcome, it's nice to know sometimes we are not alone in this journey. I didn't speak or see anyone for four months, I just couldn't handle anyone around me. Even now I have no interest in anything or anyone as bad as it sounds, but I am miserable without my mum. Like you said ,even tho your mum was 84 it still doesn't make it any easier. My mum was 66 and even knowing she was dying did not prepare me in anyway for her death and all that follows. I try just to get through each day and don't think about tomorrow or next week, it's just so hard. A lot of us post on the daily thread, join us there , it's a great bunch of people. 

Hugs Lisa 

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