Another 4th of July w/out Dad!

[missinmydad]

Hello everyone,

I lost my Dad almost two years ago and I still cry all the time. He was truly my best friend so the sadness hasn't gone away. This will be the second fourth of July I spend without him. I always thought of him first when planning a holiday get together and now I plan nothing! My life has been on stand by since he passed away and I don't know how to snap out of it. I cannot stand the month of July anymore and I feel like my kids are suffering because of it. They want to enjoy the summer and I just want it to hurry up and be over. Does this ever get easier? I feel almost self destructive at this point, pushing everyone away because they just don't get it. I never want to go out and do anything or spend time with loved ones anymore and it's not fair to my husband or my kids. I am considering some sort of natural antidepressant but don't know where to even start looking. I hope this is just a part of grieving and comes to a end soon. I am so relieved to have this place where people do get it!

[socal2010]

Hi - I didn't see your post until today for some reason. Sorry this response is so late.

I know what you mean about pushing people away. I don't want anyone near me and I'm actually finding that I have a lot of anger issues and resentments with people. The best part of my family was taken away when my Mom died. I don't like what's left of it!

Did you ever try an anti-depressant? I'm still looking for a psychologist or some type of counselor I can connect to. I think it's good to get professional help but it's hard finding the right person. That's great you have your husband and kids to help you get through. Sometimes I wonder if that would make it easier or harder. I guess it's individual.

I hope you're feeling okay and have found some support. Let us know how you're doing.