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Hope, Memories - Please share your stories about how you have learned to love a new love again


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Hi All,

I started this new topic because I don't know where to put this post/topic.  This topic is about hope after grieving.  I posted to the young widows forum almost two years ago when I lost Blaine (my sweetie) to suicide/drowing.

For the first time since his death, I visited his grave (some 2000 miles away from where I live) and didn't have an adverse emotional reaction.

I post this out of the fact that we can have hope as we move on...and those memories are cherished of our past loves of our lives, those we have lost, etc...

My story of hope is that I have found someone who Blaine would approve of who I am spending my life with until I leave this planet, or he does.  We are amazing together and somehow I can see Blaine (as well as my dad, who passed away the same week) smiling and raining blessings down upon the two of us! 

So, with that being said,  Please share your stories of hope how you have learned to love again if you are a widow/widower in a new love relationship.   Meanwhile, my desire is that this topic gives hope to those who have newly lost a spouse, boyfriend, girlfriend or partner...


M. Carter


PS: I won't be back again for a very long time... but will check in every now and then.  This community has helped me sooo much during the hardest times of grief. Hope the reunion is a hit!



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I have met a widower and I am a widow. We have been dating for more than a year. This is a fantastic companionship for both of us. I was married for 30 years and he lost his 2nd wife after only 3 years. I can't be sure if I 'love' him, but I love being with him. He has expressed that he is not in love and thinks that he should have fallen in love, much like the way he fell for his wife. Me, at this point I am questioning the falling in love again and have no problem right now embracing a wonderful companion. We are both 53, I lost my husband 2 years and he 3 years.  After being so in love are the expectation of falling in love with someone unrealistic? We both had the loves of our lives and call me cynical, but I find it hard to believe that it could happen again. As we all know, finding that someone special is a hard enough task, but to have it happen 2 times in a lifetime at this stage of our lives. Right now we are staying together, but we have been dating a bit outside of our relationship to see if there is something else out there. The feedback that I am looking for would be to answer the question about expectations at our age. Is it too soon for us to have moved on to another love?

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Hi Deb,

Enjoy each other and just live in the moment.  Go with your gut on this and you can't go wrong, right?

And believe it or not...Mark is a THIRD time in my lifetime.  If you believe it...it WILL happen.

Just stopped by briefly here and saw your post... thanks for sharing your new romance story...

Sometimes you don't know you're in love until way after you are in it.  Sometimes it's fireworks, sometimes it's by mistake, sometimes it's under your nose, sometimes it's impossible to see.

And those silly expectations we have of ourselves...I try to throw those out with my other baggage sometimes we don't want to put down...

Hope for the best...and blessings to both of you...




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