3 weeks

[basic62]

I don't know what to say or how to say it but i'll try,

i lost my wife of 7 years on march 2nd to a bleed on her brain,no warning signs. we had a great night out with our grandson and youngest daughter,we came home to relax and both fell asleep on our couch,something we did every week.

i woke at midnight to her saying she had a massive headache she took a aspirin,and we went to bed. she awoke a half hour later and got sick,less then a hour later she had a massive stroke in our bed.

i met her 12 years ago when i jumped off a delivery truck and she was standing there in a pink dress looking so pretty i knew i was in love that moment. a few years later we talked about when we each knew were in love and we both went back to that day. she knew the day may 12.

i wont say ours was a perfect marriage but it was very close,we were always together,in 12 years i can count on 1 hand the times we were apart.

between us we had 5 kids and in the past couple years that grew to include 2 grandkids,life was great we talked about retiring in 6 years when all the kids would be old enough to be on their own.

I watched her pass away in our bed i can still see it happening in my mind,but each day i look at the clock and wonder what she is doing now,when i get home i look again at the clock and think she will be home soon,i have called her cell a few times to see what's going on.

i cant seem to get past the point of her death she was only 47 and in great health.

Im sorry if im rambling on but this is the way i have been thinking since she passed.

i don't know what Im looking for here maybe just to talk about it,i don't know.

[rodless]

It's ok not to know what to say. We all understand where you're coming from and I'm sorry you had to find this place. For awhile it will all seem so surreal. Like you said you wait for them to come home, wonder what they're doing. Eventually reality hits and that's another ballgame. Stay on the board and people will help you through as much as they can. I've been coming to this site for over two years and it has been a blessing.

Mary Jo

[missingcurtis]

Sorry to hear of your loss.  Time is a great healer but even after 3 years, I still want to tell my husband things.  Usually when I hear a song we llinked or a joke we both used to laugh at.

We hadn't been apart very much in 36 years, just a few nights here and there.  So at first I kept thinking he would be home soon. 

I finally decided to move out of our house, which I have regretted.  But he had hung every picture on the wall, hung the drapes, planted the trees and bushes in the yard and it was just too hard for me.

I know a lot of people find peace in staying in the house where they lived together but I feel better (most days) being in a house he never lived in.  Some days I wish he was here to see the house but he is with me in spirit.

Just remember no one can take away your memories.