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No more hugs from my Dad


boots9

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I lost my dad on Sunday November 2, 2008.  He had been sick for the last couple of years but no matter what happened he always bounced back.  I am so sad.  I miss him so much.  His passing has only recently hit me.  At first it was such a sense of relief that he was out of the pain he suffered with for far too long.  I have been thinking lately that this is final.  There will never be another hug, another I love you, another phone call, another day to just hang out with him watching tv.  Its all the little everyday things i miss.  It also feels like there is one less person in the world who loves you.  I had to find somewhere to express how I felt and I thought this would be the best place possible to try and let out some of my feelings.  I appreciate anyone who read this and I would be happy to hear from anyone.  Thank you for your time.

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I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I lost mine in May, 2007.  I completely understand how you are feeling--there are days that I dont think that I have accepted the reality that he is gone, and its been a year and a half.  One thing in your post that I really need to comment on is your feeling of "It also feels like there is one less person in the world who loves you."  It really tug at my heart strings.  Just remember, your dad still loves you and his love and his memory live on in you so dont forget how wonderful that feeling is--it's so easy to get lost in the pain of loss and even easier to lose focus on the fact that his love lives in you each and every day--that's the ultimate gift given to us by those who truly love us unconditionally. 

Please feel free to msg me whenever if you want to talk, I wish you all of the best as you move forward on this path--

Michele

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I share your same hurt. My dad passed in his sleep very unexpectedly on March 20, 2006. My mother passed December 31, 2007...unexpectedly as well. These past 11 months have been an emotional rollercoaster for me. I lost both of my parents unexpectedly and I am an only child who has no one that can understand my pain. So much to bear in a short time so I understand. I know it sounds so cliche but time will ease some of the pain but it will never go away. So many things will remind you of him and sometimes you'll just try to live as if he's still here....just at work or out of town. It hurt me especially b/c after my dad passed, my mother and I refused to move any of his things...so for an entire year and a half..all of his personal belongings....old cigarette butts...shoes...were still exactly how he left them when he passed. The same for my mother when she passed. I just had to deal with the emotional task of cleaning out my parents' home. That was the hardes thing I ever had to do. Everything was sentimental to me an I couldn't bear to throw anything away so I donated most of their things. I still have to return to Ohio to clear out the rest of the house but I just have to try to get through the holidays first. My reality is like an ongoing nightmare. Some days  I grieve for my mom, other days I grieve for my dad....it's like torture. Then....there are some days....I just want to die myself.

I pray that you have strenght. It will be a long road ahead but you will get through. Please email me whenever you need to talk. Take care...

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[user=25010]boots9[/user] wrote:

I lost my dad on Sunday November 2, 2008.  He had been sick for the last couple of years but no matter what happened he always bounced back.  I am so sad.  I miss him so much.  His passing has only recently hit me.  At first it was such a sense of relief that he was out of the pain he suffered with for far too long.  I have been thinking lately that this is final.  There will never be another hug, another I love you, another phone call, another day to just hang out with him watching tv.  Its all the little everyday things i miss.  It also feels like there is one less person in the world who loves you.  I had to find somewhere to express how I felt and I thought this would be the best place possible to try and let out some of my feelings.  I appreciate anyone who read this and I would be happy to hear from anyone.  Thank you for your time.

Dear boots,

I am so very sorry to hear about the loss of your dad. I too lost my dad on Oct. 20th of this year.  He died from a masive stroke. He was in a coma for two weeks and woke up the day before he passed away. He knew who we were and tried to communicate, but the stroke had taken away his ability to speak.  His last two weeks still haunt me. At first, after he passed, I too felt a sense of relief that he wouldn't suffer anymore, but now, I just miss him so much. My mom passed away in July of 2006 so I have had a little experience with grief. It took over my life when she passed away, and I'm trying to not let that happen this time.  I have a husband and a daughter who need me  and I'm trying to deal with this loss better than I did before. It's still so hard. I found this site after she passed away and never posted but read everything I could. It helped me on this horrible journey we all have to make. When I read your post, I felt compelled to reply since my dad passed away so recently too. Take your time with your grief. Don't let anyone impose a time limit. You will never get over the loss, but it will get easier. Time does help. I never believed that before, but have experienced it and am waiting for it to help me with my dad's loss. Reading books on grief also helped me a lot. Hope this helped a little. Know that you are not alone.  Please take care and I'll keep you as well as all of you who have had losses in my prayers.

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