Poems for loss

[cameronsmom1]

I thought it would be neat if we made a forum where we could share poems for loss. It could be one that you wrote or just one that you've found and really liked. I hope you will share your poetry with us and can find comfort in everyone else's. Thanks, Amanda

[cameronsmom1]

I wrote this for my son's funeral

Our Goodbye

We never thought we'd say goodbye before we got to say hello                            

We have so many questions but there's things we'll never know                     

Everything happens for a reason and although it isn't fair                                       

We all wish that we were with you there                                                                    

It hurt so much to know that there was nothing we could do                                 

And we never got the chance to spend our time with you                                    

There will always be a place for you in everybody's heart                                       

And that's our way of knowing we'll never be apart                                                  

So many people loved you although you never met                                                 

But there's little things about you we never will forget                                            

Your brother may not understand but he did love you so                                         

And when it comes the time we'll help him to let go                                                 

It's so hard for me and daddy to have to say goodbye                                              

And hard to think about you and try not to cry                                                      

You're a beautiful baby boy and we wish you could have stayed                             

But we will try to be strong and we'll take it day by day                                         

This is our goodbye although it's the last thing we want to do                                 

So rest in peace our baby boy we will always love you

Love Mommy

Written By: Amanda Wittner

[cameronsmom1]

[align=center]Me and Mommy[/align]

[align=center] [/align]

[align=center]I’m really sorry son that you didn’t get to stay

But I know that there’s some reason that you had to go away

It isn’t normal and isn’t right the way you had to leave

But me and mommy know it’s the way it had to be

We won’t forget you baby, me, mom, and Cam

And it’s so hard for us that we never held your hand

But we love you always son and never forget we do

And even though we couldn’t go we will always be by you

You are such a great part of us that cannot be replaced

And me and mommy will never forget your beautiful face

So go in peace our little man and be strong all the way

We know you will cause me and mommy made you that way

We don’t know how to say goodbye and wish you could have stayed

Me and mommy hope so much that you understand our way

Of saying goodbye and letting you go the way that you had to

But me and mommy won’t forget you bubba and will always love and miss you[/align]

[align=center]

Love Daddy[/align]

[align=center]Written By: Jeremiah Wittner[/align]

[cameronsmom1]

Dear Brayden,

Every night I lay in bed and I think of you

Wondering how things would be if this nightmare wasn’t true

Sometimes when I wake up I swear I hear your cry

But all there is is silence and my heart crumbles inside

You would be 10 weeks old if you were here today

I’m still so hurt inside that you didn’t get to stay

Me and dad are trying to accept what we can’t change

I hide my hurt with laughter, he covers his with rage

We’ve tried to move on and live our normal life

But you’re suppose to be here and we know this isn’t right

We wanted you so bad and this isn’t fair at all

Why can’t I hear you try to talk or watch you learn to crawl

I still have all your things as if you’re coming back

I was so prepared but you’re the only thing I lack

Cameron talks about you every now and then

Because like us he knows where you should have been

I miss you more and more each day and I always will

And I know no matter what that all this is for real

But we will be together someday, you, cam, dad and me

We love you so much Brayden, Love your mommy

Written By: Amanda Wittner

[cassies]

This is the poem I wrote for Tanner on the day he died and it was read at his funeral.

[align=center]

Our Baby

As your grow my little one, I know you are there.

I feel you every second of every day.

We cannot wait to meet you.

Here you are new to this world.

Such a precious child you have become.

You have grown up to be such a blessing in our family.

As we watch you and Cooper fight and play we know

you are our little Mighty Mouse.

But Good took you away from us today.

Why does our little Mighty Mouse have to go now?

He has so much to live for.

Not now God; not ever.

God has taken you away because He knows you will be better off with Him.

God has given us a little Guardian Angel and his name is Tanner.

October 8, 2008

Love, Mommy

[/align]

[cameronsmom1]

It's beautiful! I'm so glad you are writing because it helps so much. Keep it up. I hope to hear more from you on down the road. It is nice to look back from the first thing you wrote and see how far you've come.

Amanda

[cameronsmom1]

Since heaven has become your home

I sometimes feel I'm so alone;

And though we now are far apart

You hold a big piece of my heart

I never knew how much I'd grieve

When it was time for you to leave

Or just how much my heart would ache

From that one fragment you would take

God lets this tender hole remain,

reminding me we'll meet again,

and one day all the pain will cease

When He restores this missing piece

He'll turn to joy my every tear

with thoughts of you I hold so dear,

and they'll become my special way

to treasure our Reunion Day.

[azsummer2003]

[align=center]What is Normal after your child dies?[/align]

[align=center]Original poem by Tara & Heath Carey

Normal is having tears waiting behind every smile when you realize someone important is missing from all the important events in your

family's life.

Normal is trying to decide what to take to the cemetery for Birthdays, X-mas, Hanukkah, Thanksgiving, New Years, Valentine's Day, July 4th and Passover.

Normal is feeling like you can't sit another minute without getting up and screaming, because you just don't like to sit through anything anymore.

Normal is not sleeping very well because a thousand what if's & why didn't I's go through your head constantly.

Normal is reliving the accident continuously through your eyes and mind, holding your head to make it go away.

Normal is having the TV on the minute you walk into the house to have noise, because the silence is deafening.

Normal is staring at every boy who looks like he is Taylor's age. And then thinking of the age he'd would be now. Then wondering why it is even important to imagine it, because it will never happen.

Normal is every happy event in your life always being backed up with

sadness lurking close behind, because of the hole in your heart.

Normal is telling the story of your child's death as if it were

an everyday, commonplace activity, and then seeing the horror in

someone's eyes at how awful it sounds. And yet realizing it has

become a part of your "normal."

Normal is each year coming up with the difficult task of how to honor your childs's memory and their birthdays and survive these days. And trying to find the balloon or flag that fit's the occasion. Happy Birthday? Not really.

Normal is my heart warming and yet sinking at the sight of something special Taylor loved. Thinking how he would love it, but how he is not here to enjoy it.

Normal is having some people afraid to mention my son, Taylor.

Normal is making sure that others remember him.

Normal is after the funeral is over everyone else goes on with their lives, but we continue to grieve our loss forever.

Normal is weeks, months, and years after the initial shock, the grieving gets worse, not better.

Normal is not listening to people compare anything in their life to this loss, unless they too have lost a child. Nothing compares.

NOTHING.

Even if your child is in the remotest part of the earth away from you - it doesn't compare.

Losing a parent is horrible, but having to bury your own child is unnatural.

Normal is taking pills, and trying not to cry all day, because you know your mental health depends on it.

Normal is realizing you do cry everyday.

Normal is being impatient with everything and everyone but someone stricken with grief over the loss of their child.

Normal is sitting at the computer crying, sharing how you feel with chat buddies who have also lost a child.

Normal is not listening to people make excuses for

G-d.

"G-d may have done this because…"

I know Taylor is in "heaven," but hearing people trying to think up excuses as to why a fantastic young man was taken from this earth is not appreciated and makes absolutely no sense to this grieving mother.

Normal is being too tired to care if you paid the bills, cleaned the house, did the laundry or if there is any food.

Normal is wondering this time whether you are going to say you have two children or one child, because you will never see this person again and it is not worth explaining that Taylor is dead.

And yet when you say you have one child to avoid that problem, you feel horrible as if you have betrayed the dead child.

Normal is asking G-d why he took your child's life instead of yours and asking if there even is a G-d.

Normal is knowing you will never get over this loss, not in a day nor a million years.

Normal is having therapists agree with you that you will never "really" get over the pain and that there is nothing they can do to help you because they know only bringing back your child back from the dead could possibly make it "better."

Normal is learning to lie to everyone you meet and telling them you are fine. You lie because it makes others uncomfortable if you cry. You've learned it's easier to lie to them then to tell them the truth that you still feel empty and it's probably never going to get any better -- ever.

And last of all...

Normal is hiding all the things that have become "normal" for you to

feel, so that everyone around you will think that you are "normal." [/align]

[align=center]The above poem was originally written by Tara and Heath Carey after they lost their daughters Violet and Iris in 2002 when natural gas caused their apartment to explode. I have taken the liberty to rewrite and change parts of the poem to fit it more to Taylor's personality.  I hope you are able to apply the same techniques to this poem to help you remember your child.

[/align]

[hotrod]

Lori

Again Thank You 

That Poem said it all

Betty

[cameronsmom1]

azsummer2003,

That is great. I am going to copy it and put it in my blogs on myspace because everyone always wonders what is normal after losing a child. When will I go back to normal? Maybe this will help them understand that this is the new normal. Thanks,

Amanda

www.myspace.com/dedicatedtoourangelbabies

 

[azsummer2003]

You're welcome. I'm not sure there is a "normal" for us. I certainly don't feel normal any more.....

[mpsmom]

What a true poem, thank you ...............

Warm Hugs

Marcia

[mpsmom]

I 'd like to share a prayer Bethany's Dad read at her 'Celebration of life"  

I give you this one thought to keep --

I am with you still -- I do not sleep.

I am a thousand winds that blow,

I am the diamond glints on the snow,

I am the sunlight on ripened grain,

I am the gentle autumn rain.

When you awaken in the morning's hush

I am the swift, uplifting rush

of quiet birds in circled flight.

I am the soft stars that shine at night.

Do not think of me as gone --

I am with you still --- in each new dawn. 

Bethany is part Native American , we thought this appropriate

Marcia

 

[cameronsmom1]

[align=center]My Mom Is A Survivor

My Mom is a survivor,

or so I've heard it said.

But I can hear her crying at night

when all others are in bed.[/align]

[align=center]I watch her lay awake at night

and go to hold her hand.

She doesn't know I'm with her

to help her understand.[/align]

[align=center]But like the sands on the beach

that never wash away...

I watch over my surviving mom,

who thinks of me each day.[/align]

[align=center]She wears a smile for others...

a smile of disguise!

But through Heaven's door I see

tears flowing from her eyes.[/align]

[align=center]My mom tries to cope with death

to keep my memory alive.

But anyone who knows her knows

it is her way to survive.[/align]

[align=center]As I watch over my surviving mom

through Heaven's open door...

I try to tell her that angels

protect me forevermore.[/align]

[align=center]I know that doesn't help her...

or ease the burden she bears.

So if you get a chance, go visit her...

and show her that you care.[/align]

[align=center]For no matter what she says...

no matter what she feels.

My surviving mom has a broken heart

that time won't ever heal[/align]

[lolynbo]

A Whisper From Heaven

They say that life is fleeting

I know that this is true

I left this world so quickly

With no goodbye to you.

I know how much you miss me

Your tears fall ever light

The pillow where you lay your head

Is wet with them at night.

I know your heart is hurting

The words we left, unsaid

I love you’s, left unspoken

Are spinning in your head.

The strength that I have carried

That served to make you whole

Remains to make you stronger

Within your grieving soul.

For you see, while you were weeping

On the day I passed away

At the gravesite near the flowers

Where my loved ones knelt to pray.

An angel came to see me

She took me by the hand

She led me to a kingdom

In a very distant land.

As I look down from heaven

And see you standing there

Your heart so ever burdened

With more grief than it can bear.

I long to bring you comfort

I long to give you peace

I long to hold you closely

Cause all your tears to cease.

The joy I’ve found in heaven

Goes far beyond compare

The love that’s so elusive

Can be found here everywhere.

The light is softly shining

There’s no storm clouds here or rain

There’s no teardrops found in heaven

There’s no suffering, there’s no pain.

You needn’t be so troubled

Stay close to God and pray

That someday we’ll be together

One bright and glorious day.

So my love, you shouldn’t question

My dear you need not cry

I’ve gone to be with Jesus

I really didn’t die.

[lolynbo]

A heart of gold stopped beating

Two shining eyes at rest

God broke our hearts to prove to us

He only takes the best

[cameronsmom1]

[align=center]My Dream

You came to visit me last night; I woke up to your cry

I looked around for Cameron but it was you right by my side

I picked you up so gently, and held you oh so close

It seems you come to visit just when I need you most

I carried you to the living room so that we could play

I wanted Cameron to wake up; I wondered what he’d say

You showed me that you learned to crawl and sit up by yourself

And just like your big brother you went straight to the movie shelf

I got on my computer to show you pictures of everyone

You pointed and yelled bubba every time you saw Cameron

My heart just melted I can tell you love him very much

I took you to his room so that he could feel your touch

He was snuggled to the teddy bear you left behind for him

You kissed him on the cheek over and over again

We went back to the bedroom and I knew our time was through

So I laid down and wrapped my arms so tightly around you

I know I was only dreaming but I love how real it seems

At least I get to see you even if only in my dreams

Written By: Amanda Wittner[/align]

[lolynbo]

MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM HEAVEN

I STILL HEAR THE SONGS

I STILL SEE THE LIGHTS

I STILL FEEL YOUR LOVE,

ON ACOLD WINTRY NIGHTS

I STILL SHARE YOUR HOPES

AND ALL OF YOUR CARES

I"LL EVEN REMIND YOU

TO PLEASE SAY YOUR PRAYERS

I JUST WANT TO TELL YOU

YOU STILL MAKE ME PROUD

YOU STAND HEAD AND SOULDERS

ABOVE THE CROWD

KEEP TRYING EACH MOMENT

TO STAY IN HIS GRACE

I CAME HERE BEFORE YOU

TO HELP SET YOUR PLACE

YOU DONT HAVE TO BE

PERFECT ALL THE TIME

HE FORGIVES YOU THE SLIP

IF YOU CONTINUE THE CLIMB

TO MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS

PLEASE BE THANKFUL TODAY

IM STILL CLOSE BESIDE YOU

IN A NEW SPECIAL WAY

I LOVE YOU ALL DEARLY

NOW DONT SHED A TEAR

CAUSE IM SPENDING MY

CHRISTMAS WITH JESUS THIS YEAR.