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I need help.


noblesloth

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I miss my mum so much. It's as if my body is physically attacking me because I'm too scared to mentally dive into things. Is it unhealthy to remember the bad things along with the good? Do I feel sick because it needs to come out, or because it's hurting my mental health bringing it up?

Heeeelp.

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Hi noblesloth

It's normal not to want to do anything you're grieving. My Dad passed Jan 20 and I just have an ugly feeling in my heart. I miss him so much. It doesn't help that my Mom isn't helping me grieve. Her attitude is that he was I'll and it was best he died he was suffering They were married 66 years how can she just say it like that? People grieve differently. She'll probable grieve later. I've never lost anybody close like this so it has hit me really hard. Try to remember the good times and not thinking about the end. Keeping busy is good I took up crocheting. It takes my mind off of him for a while. The memories will never go away. Spending time alone is actually better for me. I don't like being around anyone. Even when I'm with my husband I don't want to say much. Peace and quiet is what helps me right now. Hope some of this helps you.

Blessing to you!

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Guest Kirbibizzle

Hi noblesloth

It's normal not to want to do anything you're grieving. My Dad passed Jan 20 and I just have an ugly feeling in my heart. I miss him so much. It doesn't help that my Mom isn't helping me grieve. Her attitude is that he was I'll and it was best he died he was suffering They were married 66 years how can she just say it like that? People grieve differently. She'll probable grieve later. I've never lost anybody close like this so it has hit me really hard. Try to remember the good times and not thinking about the end. Keeping busy is good I took up crocheting. It takes my mind off of him for a while. The memories will never go away. Spending time alone is actually better for me. I don't like being around anyone. Even when I'm with my husband I don't want to say much. Peace and quiet is what helps me right now. Hope some of this helps you.

Blessing to you!

 

Hello Celia,

 

I too have that same feeling, that there's an ugliness in me now. There's a scar on my heart that won't heal. My entire existence doesn't feel right anymore now that my dad has passed away. My mom doesn't understand what I am going through because she wasn't as close to my dad as I was. Even though they were married 15 years, they separated and haven't been close since. My dad and I were pretty much the closest two people could get.

 

My mom doesn't want to see me cry, but it's impossible not to. She just wants to help me and I get that, but how can you help someone as damaged as me, or you? Our moms may not know the right words to say to take the pain away, but at the very least they are trying and that is what counts. It makes sense to say your dad's suffering has ended. Our dads don't have to live with any more pain, and that is the last thing we would ever want them to experience. If the roles were reversed and we died instead, I am sure they would be feeling exactly how we are feeling right now, lost and hurt. That's how much love there will forever be between us.

 

My mind keeps jumping to those final moments at the hospital, and I want to block all of that out. I don't want to think of it because it's too painful. I want to wash my mind clean of his death and just imagine my dad's on a trip somewhere and that he'll be back some day. I wish I knew how to do that.

 

I like being alone, as I have been ever since my dad and I have lived together. It was always just me and him, and now it's like my soul mate has gone missing. My mom stops by to try and talk, but there's no words to help lessen these feelings of emptiness.

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It is normal i couldnt eat for days couldnt sleep couldnt do anything. Its hard and as unrealistic as it seems it does get better i wouldnt say easier because i still get upset and its been a year but you learn to try and carry on the best you can xx

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