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My best friend <3


sophie89

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**I'm really just writing this to vent and hopefully get some feedback on how to handle everything.....

 

I'm 17 and three months from yesterday i lost the best friend that i've had since i was five to an overdosage of a drug. It was honestly the hardest thing i have ever had to go through in my entire life! I felt like my entire life was just torn apart in just a matter of a few days. We were best friends for over ten years and it was like i had to restart my whole life without her. And even before her death i had many problems with an alcohol and drug abuser as a father. It was like she was the only one that understood. And now i lost her to a stupid drug that she barley started taking and Since she was totally against it up until the last two months she was alive, which was when she got involved in all of the horrible things. I mean it was all just such a shock that she passed away on a drug that she hated! Its just hard to understand. Its been three months and i'm still have an extremely hard time coping with everything. I mean at first i wasn't eating or sleeping until my friends made me eat and mom tried to make me sleep. But i still don't feel any different from the day that i found out, til now. I mean so many people say things will get better, things are going to get easier. But the way i see it is that things don't really get better or easier. In fact to me, the only thing that gets easier is being able to hide the true emotions you feel. I don't really know how to handle such a big lose in my life, i feel like crawling under a rock and dying. Because to my life is too hard with out your best friend at your side.

A huge part of me felt as if it should of been me, since i was involved with alll of this [drugs, drinking, and parties] then she was, i felt angry because i wished god could of taken me.......

 But in writing this i hope to get some advice or maybe some inspiration to help me with everything. I mean just by reading these blogs i see that you've all mostly gone through what i'm going through, and i just wanted to know.....What do you do? How do you cope with such a huge lose?

-sophie89

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Dear Sophia,

I just read your message and hope over the last 3 months you have managed to have a semi ok life. Life is strange the way it can change with a drop of a hat, what you must remember is that your friend would want u 2 go on and be yourself and never to take your life 4 granted, remember your friend and all the great times you had ,and I hope that and talking to a counsellor will help. take care mazza.

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Sophia-

I really feel for you. I too lost my best friend...2 months ago in a car accident and like you and your friend we had been best friends for 15 years so without them its like you are missing half of yourself...you feel like everythings been sucked out of you. And I cant say it will get easier cuz for me its only gotten harder. But something that helps me is- when i remember one of our memories or good times we had together I write it in a journal so i wont ever forget. It seems to help a lot..get to remember the good times <3

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Sophia-

I really feel for you. I too lost my best friend...2 months ago in a car accident and like you and your friend we had been best friends for 15 years so without them its like you are missing half of yourself...you feel like everythings been sucked out of you. And I cant say it will get easier cuz for me its only gotten harder. But something that helps me is- when i remember one of our memories or good times we had together I write it in a journal so i wont ever forget. It seems to help a lot..get to remember the good times <3

Mandy,

I am sorry for your loss, but thank you for taking the time to come here and share with us. Your suggestion about a journal is wonderful! Please come back and post as often as you feel like it.

ModKonnie

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