Jump to content
Forum Conduct & Guidelines Document ×

Lost my brother & only sibling


mne0009

Recommended Posts

  • Members

I lost my big brother, and only sibling, Joey to an accident drug overdose on Nov 7, 2013. He was only 30. I feel I am having an exceptionally difficult time dealing with this. My mother and I are the most affected and it seems no one understands us. My very best friends, who have been there through thick and thin for the past 10+ years don't even know what to do with me anymore and I live with them.

All I want to do is live normal life again but situation are making it so hard. I can barely get the image of him in his casket out of my head. I'm reaching out to anyone that's lost someone, do you ever live a normal life again? When did it get easier for you? What did you do?

Any insight please.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

MNE,

I am very sorry about the loss of your brother. Your loss is very, very new. The shock is probably just starting to wear off, and the reality is setting in. You may be feeling dull, bleak and cannot find joy in anything. That is really normal. I know this won't help, but it does get better. It is going to take some time, and your friends just might not understand how much time if they have not experienced such a profound loss. Continue to talk with your mother (who desperately needs you), and continue to cry, rage and do whatever you need to get through this time. Try to eat right, drink plenty of water and sleep when you can (being run down makes the healing process much slower). Try to exercise if you become anxious or irritated (a long walk or a brisk jog can help). Try writing your feelings out. You may even want to join a support group in your area.

We will be here for you.

ModKonnie

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

MNE, 

 

This sounds a lot like my story. I lost  my older brother November 11, 2013. He would have been 33 the next day, November 12, 2013.Growing up it was just me and him. I have a sister but we didn't know each other growing up. So just me and him. We were best friends.His death was UNEXPECTED. He didn't do any hard drugs or anything. Here I sit 2 months later with no answers. We don't even know what caused his death. I am just now reaching out for help or somewhere to talk about it. I don't understand why this happened.

 

We would hang out and sit up til the early morning hours talking about the old day growing up, the days ahead, about his 4 children, playing video games and jamming to some great music. He hated talking on the phone, but we used to talk for hours. My friends even told me hoe jealous they were that they were close to their siblings like us. Go, I miss him.

 

As for it getting back to normal... never. There is only the new normal. The reality that everyday I wake up and cannot call him, plan a trip to visit, to just hang out with my brother. I can't plan my month long summer visit with him and his kids... I can't call him when something good happens or something bad even. I have his pictures hanging EVERYWHERE I can and I talk to those when I need to. I cry and yell and scream. I try to be strong when talking with my mom and dad cause I know it is even harder for them, but my heart aches so badly. 

 

Please feel free to just let you emotions pour into your post. It mt help you.

 

Moon

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Members

I recently posted about a very similar experience. I only lost my only full brother (I have a step brother and step sister who I love dearly, but it is not the same as growing up with someone) only two weeks ago. It feels like an eternity and yesterday all at once. I can't offer you much comfort because I am feeling exactly what you are. I feel broken and lost and don't care about anything. I have this phrase that runs through my head when people talk to me about stupid things, other things, "It doesn't matter, none of this matters." It is all I keep thinking as the rest of the world returns to normal and I am left alone in my grief with my poor grief stricken mother. It was the three of us for most of our lives, then it wasn't. Now, it is, in a way, just the two of us. I feel physically ill just writing that. I pray, but nothing brings him back. I ask him for signs, I ask him to show up sitting on my couch or in a window. I talk to him a LOT when I am alone. I hope that doesn't mean I am crazy. All I can say is this--I am here if you ever want to talk via private message. I am feeling a similar set of feelings, and I am lost, too.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

This site uses cookies We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue. and uses these terms of services Terms of Use.