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I had a dream of my dad. He was healthy, happy. It was such a real dream. I can still smell him.

All that happened though was he looked at me, smiled a little and said "wow, i cant believe youre 21 already." Then i woke up.

It makes me so angry that for the rest of my life he wont see me turn 22, 23, 24.... Get married.. Have kids.

All my half sisters, who he raised like his own, got that. So why was it taken from me? What did i do so wrong?

And i wonder wherever he is, or if he is anywhere in the alternate universe. If he really is capable of missing me like i do him. I wonder if he knows where im going in life or when my times up.

Don't want to go back to sleep.

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