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I am angry


alexsdor

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My Dad died 3 weeks ago on 11.11.2012 which was also my sister's birthday. He was only 68 and healthy and he died of an unknown virus which caused respiratory failure and kidney failure. I am 41 and I feel robbed. I feel like a limb has been cut off... you still feel it but it's not there anymore... I'm so angry, sad, devastated... how do you get over something like this??? I don't know how... I wake up in the middle of the night having nightmares that my Dad died and when I open my eyes I think "oh wow, what a terrible nightmare" and a second later it dawns on me that it's actually true... and the pain rushes in like a Tsunami again... I am so angry at life, so angry... it's hard to breathe, my chest hurts... My mother is devastated and I'm afraid she will die of sadness... My parents were married when she was 17 and he was 21 and it was a beautiful love story until he died... I am so angry and devastated...

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alexdsor - I understand what you are going through. Hang in there, things will eventually get better. Know that there are so many others who are in your shoes. Yet we have to find our peace and resume normal. It will be a new normal but there has to be one. It will eventually happen. The feelings you go through are quite normal during grieving.

I also lost my father 2 months ago. He was only 69 and in perfect health. He also died of respiratory failure, all on a sudden and unexpected. he was in hospital for 2 weeks and I do not know if they correctly diagnosed what's actually causing it. They were treating the bacterial infection first, then said it's a fungal one and so.All I know is we lost him and I can't keep thinking there could have been something to save him. He did not have diabetes, pressure,...any of those things, so I never thought a lung infection could take his life. Life is umimaginable and strange. I am much younger than you are. I am happy that you had 41 years with him. How old is your mom? My mom is still young and is devastated. She was dependent on him for everything. He was the pillar of our house and he took care of everything. We are suddenly orphaned and feel hopeless.

Do you have siblings? Family of your own? Hang on to them for support. They will help you resume the person you once were. I get the same nightmares as you do. My mom recently had a strong dream in which she thought my father died, then woke to realise with reliefe that he hasn't, only to realise later, he actually did. What a trauma!

My heart rips in pain to think he was only 69 and had to die of a lung infection. His renal functions were normal. so were cardinal functions. Life is cruel, sometimes. We have to just face it.

You take care.

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