Members gunnerswife Posted September 12, 2012 Members Report Share Posted September 12, 2012 Most of us on here are to young to of lost our partner. i thought you didn't lose them until you were old and scarey. He always told me we would grow old and scarey together., well that isn't going to happen. I am really scared without him. I went to a widow-wiidower meet yesterday i was the youngest one there and the newest to the loss. They were at the age you expect and know this will happen, most of them were in there 70 or 80. i said oh i was hoping there was younger ones someone my age then i said no i don't. i don't wish this on anyone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ModKonnie Posted September 12, 2012 Members Report Share Posted September 12, 2012 Most of us on here are to young to of lost our partner. i thought you didn't lose them until you were old and scarey. He always told me we would grow old and scarey together., well that isn't going to happen. I am really scared without him. I went to a widow-wiidower meet yesterday i was the youngest one there and the newest to the loss. They were at the age you expect and know this will happen, most of them were in there 70 or 80. i said oh i was hoping there was younger ones someone my age then i said no i don't. i don't wish this on anyone.Perhaps the older ones can help you despite their age? They probably spent many decades with their partners, and they may deeply understand the anguish you are suffering.ModKonnie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members gunnerswife Posted September 12, 2012 Author Members Report Share Posted September 12, 2012 Perhaps the older ones can help you despite their age? They probably spent many decades with their partners, and they may deeply understand the anguish you are suffering.ModKonnieyes i was talking to my counseler and she said yes they are so nice they would be able to help me she advised me to go back. she said some of the men were in their early 60 i don't think they were there yesterday because everyone looked much older then me. the two men at the head of the table might have been younger but i didn't see their faces. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ericadc2 Posted September 13, 2012 Members Report Share Posted September 13, 2012 I agree with you, Gunnerswife, that we are too young for this. I am only 41 and my husband is now gone and I am alone and scared. I do know that death does not discriminate but it's so hard to take knowing that we should have had many more years together watching our daughters grow up and us growing old together. We were making plans to do things before the girls went back to school and now the plans have been stopped. I am still in shock because of the suddeness of it all. He was killed in a motorcycle accident when he lost control and struck an embankment. Not a moment goes by that I don't think of him or even of the accident, which I didn't even witness. My heart goes out to you for I know mine is empty and hurts so much! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members allen Posted September 14, 2012 Members Report Share Posted September 14, 2012 I agree with you, Gunnerswife, that we are too young for this. I am only 41 and my husband is now gone and I am alone and scared. I do know that death does not discriminate but it's so hard to take knowing that we should have had many more years together watching our daughters grow up and us growing old together. We were making plans to do things before the girls went back to school and now the plans have been stopped. I am still in shock because of the suddeness of it all. He was killed in a motorcycle accident when he lost control and struck an embankment. Not a moment goes by that I don't think of him or even of the accident, which I didn't even witness. My heart goes out to you for I know mine is empty and hurts so much!And I agree with you also, Gunnerswife, about being too young, I am old, we had 60 years together, but the pain is terrible, the best is that I won't have lot's of years to be alone, but for you young ones, go to the meetings, you will find much compassion from the older ones. Remember they have many more memories,their loss hurts terribly too, "everyplace" they go they will be jolted with a memory,allen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members gunnerswife Posted September 14, 2012 Author Members Report Share Posted September 14, 2012 Thanks Allen do you have any advise to give us youngsters. I am not that young I am 55 but to young to be without hubby. Every minute, every hour every day hurts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members student12 Posted September 14, 2012 Members Report Share Posted September 14, 2012 Hello Gunnerswife. Welcome. I am sorry for your loss. It is a challenging thing to go through no matter what age you are. I am currently in a face-to-face group and I am also the youngest, by at least 25yrs. I am 39 and lost my mom. Although I do not know exactly what you are going through, I do know the pain of grief. And I do know what it is like to be the youngest in a group setting. Stick with it. These people are there to give and recieve support. Also, in general, older people offer alot of wisdom, we can learn alot from them and their stories and advise. They are our teachers. And us younger people help them as well. We add a fresh perspective and activity to their lives. This journey may be challenging, but it is also a learning experience. Please continue to come here and talk to us, and continue with your group. It will take time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members gunnerswife Posted September 14, 2012 Author Members Report Share Posted September 14, 2012 this is not a group. i will probally do the group but it doesn't start until november this is a meet, just widows and widowers that lost their loved one. they get to gather once a month and have breakfast and we just talk to each not to the group. My friend was asking questions of the older people and when i was in the rest room they told her they hate to tell me but it will always hurt. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members cindypierce23 Posted September 17, 2012 Members Report Share Posted September 17, 2012 I was looking for a site on funerals Adelaide because my cousin ask me to search for it. I am sorry for your loss. I am not young but I lost my son when he was still inside my belly. He was 8 months then and it was already 3 days when I found out that he was no longer moving inside. It was too young and too early for him to leave us, we had not even at least seen him smiling or heard him crying. For me that was my saddest experience and the saddest day of my life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators widower2 Posted September 17, 2012 Moderators Report Share Posted September 17, 2012 My friend was asking questions of the older people and when i was in the rest room they told her they hate to tell me but it will always hurt.Yes but that might sound misleading, as if you will feel the same forever. Odds are very small of that. it will likely hurt less as time goes by. Hopefully they just meant it never goes away 100%, which makes total sense. But I think (I hope) it becomes much more manageable ........ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members naty0123 Posted September 19, 2012 Members Report Share Posted September 19, 2012 I feel ya! my husband was 34....young.....This sucks!!! Here for ya! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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