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My Boy


Tjs Mom

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I am new to this site today but not new to the pain of grief. I lost my only living child on January 21, 2012. I seem to just automatically go on day by day but don't feel as if I'm living. I miss him so much, I wake up every morning to the realization that he is really gone. Lately I dream that he is only feet away and I run to try to save him but I am moving so slow that when I finally get to him, its to late.....He's gone. My husband and I had a still born child at the sixth month of my pregnancy, then I lost my husband in a construction accident when I was seven months pregnant with my son. I thought that nothing could ever be worse until the day I found my son, alone, in his apartment, hanging by an electrical cord. I would give anything to erase that picture that I will forever carry with me in my mind.

People say time will heal the pain, but I feel as if the power went out and my life clock is blinking 12:00. I try to stay strong for every one he left, but lately I just want to scream when they come to me with their grief. In know he was a husband, a daddy, a grandchild, a nephew, a cousin and a friend but sometimes I feel like they forget, he was MY SON ! Then I feel guilty for feeling this way. I guess I came on here to finally get some things out that I can't say to people around me. Everyone is and has the right to grive for him, I just need an outlet. Thanks for having a place that feels safe for that.

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Welcome TJsmom

I am so very sorry for your loss and the sadness that you feel. YOu are not alone and I am so very glad that you found this site and were ale to share your loss.

Coming here posting, setting up a picture album in the Gallery, reading others post have all helped me to reconnect with my life and my family. I will never be the same. This loss changed me forever, but the members of this site helped me rediscover the "new me' . I urge you to keep coming back.

You are not alone.

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