My Loving Grandmother

[Charf1]

Hi...I am new here and I will need your support soon...

My Grandmother is declining fast on hospice and I am so heart broken, but I know the end is near and I should be happy for her.

She is 96 years old and all four of her children have passed and one of her deceased daughters was my mother.

My birth mother passed when I was four years old and my loving grandmother raised me.

I am now so grateful that I have had this golden opportunity to walk with her through this final journey.

I moved her into my home eight years ago and I quit my job maybe a year and a half of go to care for her .

Now, the end is nearing and I have no one left after she is gone and I know that I can not be selfish and try and hold on her.

I just do not want her to suffer and it seems that she is not , she is no longer eating food and I give her water through a syringe.

The hospice team has been remarkable but nothing takes the place of a dear loved one.

Well, I will return to this site soon because I will need all the support that I can get.

Thanks for listening.

Cyber Hugs.

[BreathofAngel]

Hi...I am new here and I will need your support soon...

My Grandmother is declining fast on hospice and I am so heart broken, but I know the end is near and I should be happy for her.

She is 96 years old and all four of her children have passed and one of her deceased daughters was my mother.

My birth mother passed when I was four years old and my loving grandmother raised me.

I am now so grateful that I have had this golden opportunity to walk with her through this final journey.

I moved her into my home eight years ago and I quit my job maybe a year and a half of go to care for her .

Now, the end is nearing and I have no one left after she is gone and I know that I can not be selfish and try and hold on her.

I just do not want her to suffer and it seems that she is not , she is no longer eating food and I give her water through a syringe.

The hospice team has been remarkable but nothing takes the place of a dear loved one.

Well, I will return to this site soon because I will need all the support that I can get.

Thanks for listening.

Cyber Hugs.

Hello dear one, It is good that you have come to us to speak about what concerns you and troubles you deeply at this time. I know the pain is great at the moment yet God makes no mistakes. No one truly knows the life span she will have except God. Until that time comes it is good that you are with her. Speaking to her and being close by can do wonders for one who is ill.

You are doing a wonderful thing in just being there with her at this most important time. Even though she may not be able to speak much I'm sure she more than appreciates your efforts and returns much love to you.

I will pray for you and your dear Grandmother that God will give her strength and peace always and that she will in some way be able to show you the joy that I know is in her heart being that you have been with her for so long a time and are her kin.

May God bless you and your dear Grandmother, my dearest, and give you the strength and tenacity to walk this most special path at this most special time with her.

[widower2]

Hi...I am new here and I will need your support soon...

My Grandmother is declining fast on hospice and I am so heart broken, but I know the end is near and I should be happy for her.

She is 96 years old and all four of her children have passed and one of her deceased daughters was my mother.

My birth mother passed when I was four years old and my loving grandmother raised me.

I am now so grateful that I have had this golden opportunity to walk with her through this final journey.

I moved her into my home eight years ago and I quit my job maybe a year and a half of go to care for her .

Now, the end is nearing and I have no one left after she is gone and I know that I can not be selfish and try and hold on her.

I just do not want her to suffer and it seems that she is not , she is no longer eating food and I give her water through a syringe.

The hospice team has been remarkable but nothing takes the place of a dear loved one.

Well, I will return to this site soon because I will need all the support that I can get.

Thanks for listening.

Cyber Hugs.

Hi and I'm very sorry for this difficult time. It sounds like you have a good perspective on it though and props to you for doing so much for her, I'm sure she appreciates it very much. You said you are alone - you have no other family or friends who may be able to help in any way? I hope that is not the case; if so, I"m all the sorrier. May I suggest you consider talking to a grief counselor. I didn't like the idea myself at first, but it helps to unload on someone, esp someone who is familiar with this area in particular (ie as opposed to going to a garden variety psychologist/etc). If nothing else we are here to listen and help if we can. Best to you

[Charf1]

1345817703' post='90373']

Hi and I'm very sorry for this difficult time. It sounds like you have a good perspective on it though and props to you for doing so much for her, I'm sure she appreciates it very much. You said you are alone - you have no other family or friends who may be able to help in any way? I hope that is not the case; if so, I"m all the sorrier. May I suggest you consider talking to a grief counselor. I didn't like the idea myself at first, but it helps to unload on someone, esp someone who is familiar with this area in particular (ie as opposed to going to a garden variety psychologist/etc). If nothing else we are here to listen and help if we can. Best to you

Thank you so much for your kind words.

[Charf1]

1345768336' post='90354']

Hello dear one, It is good that you have come to us to speak about what concerns you and troubles you deeply at this time. I know the pain is great at the moment yet God makes no mistakes. No one truly knows the life span she will have except God. Until that time comes it is good that you are with her. Speaking to her and being close by can do wonders for one who is ill.

You are doing a wonderful thing in just being there with her at this most important time. Even though she may not be able to speak much I'm sure she more than appreciates your efforts and returns much love to you.

I will pray for you and your dear Grandmother that God will give her strength and peace always and that she will in some way be able to show you the joy that I know is in her heart being that you have been with her for so long a time and are her kin.

May God bless you and your dear Grandmother, my dearest, and give you the strength and tenacity to walk this most special path at this most special time with her.

Thank you so much for your kind words.

[Charf1]

1345768336' post='90354']

Hello dear one, It is good that you have come to us to speak about what concerns you and troubles you deeply at this time. I know the pain is great at the moment yet God makes no mistakes. No one truly knows the life span she will have except God. Until that time comes it is good that you are with her. Speaking to her and being close by can do wonders for one who is ill.

You are doing a wonderful thing in just being there with her at this most important time. Even though she may not be able to speak much I'm sure she more than appreciates your efforts and returns much love to you.

I will pray for you and your dear Grandmother that God will give her strength and peace always and that she will in some way be able to show you the joy that I know is in her heart being that you have been with her for so long a time and are her kin.

May God bless you and your dear Grandmother, my dearest, and give you the strength and tenacity to walk this most special path at this most special time with her.

Thank you so much for your kind words.

[moonchaser]

Hi, just want to let you know that you're not alone. My grandfather is currently in the ICU at the hospital dying of pneumonia. He is also very elderly too (99), like your grandmother. I'm sorry that your grandmother has outlived her children but I am glad she has a grandson as loving and devoted as you. You are kind to think about her needs and she is lucky. Right now because your grandma is close to passing on she will need your help to try to make that transition as comfortable and pain-free as possible. This is what I am focusing on right now for my grandfather--a calm, peaceful transition into the next world, as painless and with as little suffering as possible.

Your own situation concerns me--it's very difficult to be alone and on your own in this world once your grandmother is gone. Although I think helping her and easing her passing should be the most important thing, when you have some free time definitely think about getting grief counseling if you can afford it. A certified social worker or therapist will help you through the grieving process and help you cope with your loss and adapt to being on you own. In reality you have been on your own a long time while caring for your grandmother, but I know it's psychologically scary nonetheless...

Do you have any friends who you might be able to rely on? Perhaps a significant other to share this with? I hope you try to reach out to others--if not to friends then to a counselor who can act as a support base as you make your own transition after your grandmother passes. I will check back periodically. Saying a prayer for you and your grandma.

[moonchaser]

Mylovinggrandmother, I also want to mention something that I realized when my grandfather passed away just a couple of days ago. You may be afraid of being alone in the world and by every right you should be. But your grandmother is also afraid to leave you. She raised you all by herself so she is naturally worried that you will be alone and this makes her passing very difficult. I urge you to reach out to friends and other people who can become a support network for you. I believe your grandmother might find it hard to pass on when she is so worried about abandoning you. I know this because after my grandfather passed away I saw my mom complain to his body on the bed for leaving us (she believed his spirit was still in the room). I thought it was selfish of her to complain like that because every time she left his side to go home to shower, nap, etc. my grandfather would start slipping. He felt more comfortable leaving this world when she was not there.

I knew that at 99 years old all he wanted was to let go--the world has changed, all of his friends have died, his wife (my grandma) passed away 20 years ago and life at the nursing home was very lonely. There was nothing left here for him to look forward to. Nothing except a year or two of more painful health problems before dying. So, I was almost happy when he started slipping away because it meant an end to his suffering and that his spirit would be free.

So, it might be good to let your grandmother know that you'll be taken care of and there are people who you can depend on--even if that person is a therapist and people from a bereavement support group. This way your grandmother can pass away quietly and peacefully instead of being filled with worry and anxiety, which is a terrible way to go.