Going backwards!!!

[naty0123]

Well our daughter started back to school and an I have spireled down all week. I feel like I did the first week my husband passed! I hate feeling like this! I cant move on to do anything and I just cant keep going like this! It is so freaking hard! I try to get the strength to move forward a little each day and just cant. I miss him so much. So much has changed already since he's been gone. I can not believe how things just move on. It's like everything is moving on , but my mind and heart and pain are the same so how do I function?????

I have to find work because I had to shut our business down cant do it without him and I dont even know where to begin! I have been self-employed for years and now going back to work for someone is so scary. I just want my life back with him. I miss him so much that it just consumes me and I have to be strong for our daughters and that is very hard to do. Our 10 year old has grown up a little faster through all of this! I dont if its because I'm a mess and she sences it or if its just the experience of loosing her dad! Life sucks!!!!!

I close my eyes and day dream on how it use to be! HE WAS MY EVERYTHING AND THEIR IS NOTHING LIKE HIM!!!! I miss his laugh, jokes, smell, grouchyness, touch, support, green eyes..just everything!

[gunnerswife]

so sorry for you. hubby and i did silly little things and had silly little sayings etc that i really miss.so sorry for your kids my son is older and he is taking it rough.

[widower2]

I'm so sorry. I can relate. You're still very early in this process; just take each day on its own and give yourself time.....also pls consider some kind of grief counseling/therapy.

[paulaj]

Five years later, I take two steps forward and one step back. I still have bad days, but not bad years. I was a wreck. You will find the strength inside yourself to do what has to be done, a little at a time. I can relate to what you are experiencing. Everyone has a different process and circumstances. Do whatever you need to do for yourself. And if you look for a therapist, remember you are the consumer. If you don't click with someone, go elsewhere.

Be Well,

Mandala

[naty0123]

I miss the laughter!! I miss him giving me hard time..i cant stand the silence! We joked around all the time. Evan though we where getting older our hearts where still like we where 17...I still felt the butterflies in my stomach when he walked in the room. I dont understand why I have to endure this pain??? I am not sure how to comfort our daughters through this..They ask me questions that I just cant ansewer

so sorry for you. hubby and i did silly little things and had silly little sayings etc that i really miss.so sorry for your kids my son is older and he is taking it rough.