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Year after losing Debra


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It has been a little over a year now since losing my Wife. When it happened I transitioned into a new job. That was fine as I had something to focus on. Now, I am unemployed and have "time" to reflect upon the situation. I did not have time to really focus on the relationship with God and Debra...and myself. A friend of mine just lost his wife and I am watching his progress. He is retired so he has alot of time to reflect. During my time I have chosen to get closer to God; read the word; try to understand what My Wife and My Friends Wife already knew. I can say that the emptiness is still here; the pain bubbles up occasionally; and the emotions do come out. But, I can also say that I am "living " with it. It was true when I heard last year that life is never the same, you just learn to deal with the loss and you never forget. There are times I get really mad when something goes wrong and Debra is not here to help or talk too. I am not whinning or feeling sorry for myself...I am just expressing the situation. I did try something recently in that I went out and met new people and although I want the closeness and intimacy it seemed that I felt better about just staying home and reading the Bible. Who knows where this is going to lead me at this point, but I want to be ready and right with God first and foremost. This is just an update......

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