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[Jebur27]

My oldest son died 5 months ago, he would have been 41 on June 21st. One reason I am posting here is that my son was a drug addict and that seems to add shame to his death. I have seen comments on here about addiction and do not feel he will be judged. He did not die from his addiction, instead he died from the damage done to his body by his addiction, massive heart attack, lungs ruined, liver and kidney damage. I never denied he was an addict and thought I was prepared for the fact he might die at anytime from an accident or overdose. There is no way I was prepared for the intense pain I have felt in the last five months, right now I just hate my life. I have had several severe challenges besides my sons death since January including my second son in the hospital with his lungs full of blood clots, so I cannot even seem to sort out which stress to deal with at any given time. No reason to go into all of it, but 2012 has been an awful year. I guess I am just reaching out because I do not know what to do with all of this pain,

[shellyku]

I am so sorry for the pain you are experiencing due to the loss of your son. My 29 year old daughter died almost

2 years ago from leukemia and this is a pain that hasn't gone away for me. It has softened some, but I miss her

presence every day. I regret to tell you that it will probably get worse before it starts to get better. The shock for

me took at least 6 months to dissipate, then it's like hitting a brick wall. I don't want to tell you it will be the same

for you, but it is a very hard road. Please come to the Loss of an Adult Child thread of this website where there are

many kind people who are walking this road also. You will find it is easy to chat with these find folks. Peace to you.

[Jeff's Mom]

My oldest son died 5 months ago, he would have been 41 on June 21st. One reason I am posting here is that my son was a drug addict and that seems to add shame to his death. I have seen comments on here about addiction and do not feel he will be judged. He did not die from his addiction, instead he died from the damage done to his body by his addiction, massive heart attack, lungs ruined, liver and kidney damage. I never denied he was an addict and thought I was prepared for the fact he might die at anytime from an accident or overdose. There is no way I was prepared for the intense pain I have felt in the last five months, right now I just hate my life. I have had several severe challenges besides my sons death since January including my second son in the hospital with his lungs full of blood clots, so I cannot even seem to sort out which stress to deal with at any given time. No reason to go into all of it, but 2012 has been an awful year. I guess I am just reaching out because I do not know what to do with all of this pain,

I too am very sorry for your loss. You are right in that you will not be judged here. Your son had an illness that became out of control. Please join us on the Loss of Adult Child site. Take care.

Kate

[shorty16]

Jebur27

We are all suffering from the same loss, the loss of a child - no matter what age, no matter what reason.

My son died car-surfing. Brian was 16. He would have been 21 on 7-12-2012. This is a long road you are on and do not worry about judgement here.

We are here to help

Colleen, Brian's Mother Forever

[hotrod]

Dear Jebur

I am so very sorry to read about he loss of your precious son. I lost my only son Stephen, 4 years ago to the side effects of alcoholism This site saved my sanity and life Please keep coming here ,reading and sharing will help you feel understood and not alone

When you feel better you can go to the Gallery Section here and share some pictures of your son. It helped me to do that

I am truly sorry for your loss.

[tayl232]

I lost my 23 year old daughter almost years ago. She would have been 28 this year but that is not all. The autopsy concluded it to be an accidental overdose. Of course it doesn't stop there. My now 30 year old went from alcohol to now hard drugs trying to cope with her sisters death the wrong way. No one has the right to judge another. There is absolutely no shame in your sons death. Sadness, frustration, anger, probably but don't let others put shame on to you. Until they have walked a mile in your sons footsteps definitely no shame.

Hang in there! I would like to say that it gets easier, many people will claim that but for me it hasn't gotten easier it only gets tolerable. Just know you are not alone. The first year after my daughter passed away I was like a zombie. There are parts of my life that I can not even remember. I would just get up and go to work come home and life was so sad. Sometimes there isn't a lot of sunshine in such darkness as death because it is so lasting. However, you are not alone in your grief. Try to find someone to reach out too just like you have in this forum. Good Luck and my prayers are with you!

My oldest son died 5 months ago, he would have been 41 on June 21st. One reason I am posting here is that my son was a drug addict and that seems to add shame to his death. I have seen comments on here about addiction and do not feel he will be judged. He did not die from his addiction, instead he died from the damage done to his body by his addiction, massive heart attack, lungs ruined, liver and kidney damage. I never denied he was an addict and thought I was prepared for the fact he might die at anytime from an accident or overdose. There is no way I was prepared for the intense pain I have felt in the last five months, right now I just hate my life. I have had several severe challenges besides my sons death since January including my second son in the hospital with his lungs full of blood clots, so I cannot even seem to sort out which stress to deal with at any given time. No reason to go into all of it, but 2012 has been an awful year. I guess I am just reaching out because I do not know what to do with all of this pain,

[Wanda]

Anyone that judges you or your son is a narrow minded, self righteous "so & so......" my faith won't let me go any further with that comment.

What I'm trying to say is, Jesus said, "he who is without sin throw the 1st stone"

I've read, death by cancer, overdose, car wreck, & many others on here.

The way I see it,

Just say I fell down the stairs & broke my leg, you fell from a ladder & broke a bone.

It's still a broken bone & it hurts, There are days I'd take a broken bone to this misery but you understand I hope!?!!!

No matter how we got here we're here now!

There are little tricks along the way. Some work from day to day & sometimes nothing works.

It's a road we have to walk the blessing is we don't have to walk it alone!

Prayers & Hugs to all of you!

[mdujardin]

I lost my son June 14th. He was 21 years old. My son took his own life. It's a long story as to why he did what he did and part of me is a bit relieved he is no longer suffering but obviously I'm grieving his loss and wish he was still here. People try to help and provide comfort and support but unless they have gone through the loss of a child they just don't know. I'm simply lost. Some days the sadness is paralyzing and other days it's just a constant ache that I try to suppress. I'm certain this is all part of grieving but I feel a complete loss of control over myself.