Losing your partner young, what was life like after?

[justmissjerry]

Hi Everyone, 

My boyfriend passed away 4 months ago, we are both young - him being 26 and myself being 28. I am wondering if anyone would be willing to share their experience if you also lost your  partner at a young age or know someone close to you who has gone through it, what was life like after? I would like to know what life was like both immediately and as time went on. What motivated you in your everyday life? Did your overall view on life change, and if so in what ways?  I am nowhere ready to move on but I think about my future a lot and wonder what life will end up like for me....so If/when you moved on what challenges did you face with that and what helped to overcome them. Do you think and worry more now about others in your life passing in the future? How long did you allow yourself to be indulged in your grief before trying to become happy again? Some days life just feels so sad and I think it will be like this forever, I have so many displaced feelings and worries.  Being so young and going through this has been hard, I don't have anyone in my life that can relate to me (thankfully for them).  If you have any insight, stories, tips or anything in general you'd like to reply with I would appreciate it, and am looking forward to reading them. 

 

 

If there are any other young grievers on here in a similar situation I would love to connect. 

[KayC]

I would caution you against going too fast...My husband had just turned 51 (we met in our mid 40s) and I hooked up with someone who said he was his friend, we got married, he used my credit for $57,000, will cost me 3 x that to pay it back...he then quit his job and went into hiding.

I realize now he was just a con. Con John.  I realized later he was not a friend of his.

Slow down and go easy.  It takes about five years to process your grief and you have grief fog in the early time (a year to two years at least).

That was 20 years ago, I still have 7 1/2 years left to pay on it.  People say why didn't I file bankruptcy...because it wasn't my banks that got me into trouble, it was me, they shouldn't have to pay for it.  Besides, crawling out the hard way I would hardly make that mistake again.  I've lived alone all this time, ad he never lived with me.

And I miss my husband every day. (And I'm proud of how fast I got a divorce!)

[justmissjerry]

I think i posted this in the wrong topic i wanted to make it just a general post, so this is not necessarily relationship driven. I tried to delete my post and re-publish it but couldn't find out how to do that either so i just left it. 

 

I definitely am not planing to rush anything and am nowhere near ready to date again in my own life. Just wanted to see how peoples lives changed in the times after in every way, not limited to relationships! 

 

That is a lot to go through especially after a loss!!! I am very sorry to hear that, and shame on him for taking advantage of you in an emotional state. 

[KayC]

Some people have no conscience, there's more he did but I'll spare you.