Widows x widowers

[Brazil Man]

It looks like there are more widows then widowers in the World. At least I see that in this forum. Is it true or is it only my impression ?

[KayC]

Yes and more widowers want to remarry because they don't want to be alone.

[Brazil Man]

Is it true that widows deals better with grief  then widowers ?

[LMR]

I've heard it said that women are better at dealing with any major trauma but you can't really generalize. I'm not dealing with my grief at all well. I never had kids though, maybe that experience gives you an inner strength??

 

 

 

[Brazil Man]

1 hour ago, LMR said:

maybe that experience gives you an inner strength??

I also don't have children, but I still have my parentes and this gives me an inner strengh.. I am 58 and my parents are already old. I know that our time on earth is short but we hope to happy in the Eternal Life.

[KayC]

13 hours ago, Brazil Man said:

Is it true that widows deals better with grief  then widowers ?

Not necessarily, just different.

I have children but they don't live here, I'm growing old (er) alone.

[ShawnC]

Statistically woman live longer than men, so more are likely to be widowed.

My personal observation leads me to believe that woman have a broader network of emotional connections and also a more full palate of emotions to share and express(socialization?) and therefore have a fuller support base. Men of a certain age were brought up to carry our own weight ; don't show weakness and of course never let them see you hurt(also socialization?) and that all leads to less people to lean on or even the ability to do so. ( these are broad generalizations and we are all individuals).

There is an age distinction when it comes to the re-partnering . Older widows (80%) prefer to stay single and older widowers (50%) want a partner. I believe some of that is life cycle issues but I do believe men used to give less in the partnership ( my dad never washed a dish my whole life , I had to teach him how to use the laundry machines when my Mom got sick) Woman expect more from their men now( as they should) and I think that makes the relationship more equal and joyful and more likely to be missed as opposed to a burden widows don't want to take up again with another partner who doesn't pick up his socks.

My two cents, sorry a little long winded. And probably wrong.

 

[KayC]

No, spot on!

[widower2]

On 11/20/2024 at 5:32 PM, Brazil Man said:

Is it true that widows deals better with grief  then widowers ?

In general of course not, and what I mean is such generalizations are meaningless..it all varies. 

[Dennis W]

Perhaps women outlive their husbands more often because they tend to marry men who are older to begin with. In my case I am 10 years older so I naturally thought Cheryl would outlive me. I still can't accept the fact that she is gone. But maybe it's not such a bad thing. I would never have wanted her to experience the agony and sorrow that I am going through.

[KayC]

My husband was two years younger than me.

[WithoutHer]

10 hours ago, Dennis W said:

Perhaps women outlive their husbands more often because they tend to marry men who are older to begin with. In my case I am 10 years older so I naturally thought Cheryl would outlive me. I still can't accept the fact that she is gone. But maybe it's not such a bad thing. I would never have wanted her to experience the agony and sorrow that I am going through.

I have the same thought. Vickie was 7 1/2 years younger than me and even though unlike me she had family that would have given her support I wouldn't want her going through what I'm am. Even though I'm all alone I have at least experienced that before. She may have felt that way emotionally before but she was never truly alone.

[KayC]

That is my one consolation with George, at least he didn't have to go through this.