Lost Preston to Cancer

[Jim M]

Hello everyone. Two months ago my best pal Preston was put down. He was 12 years old, a 90 pound Staffie/Chow/Sharpei mix.  On Halloween day 2020 he had a lung cancer removed. We were told he could not last after that more than 3-4 months. To everyone's surprise he lasted much longer. He was my best pal the entire 12 years. We thought he had beaten the cancer but a few months ago he started a decline. We found  a mass was growing pressing his windpipe and that it was fast growing. At his age we could not take the risk of general anesthesia and major surgery. The vet said he would likely not survive. He finally stopped eating and his breathing was hard. He was put down on 7/26/24 and nothing is the same. I had been home cooking his meals for many years due to a fat intolerant condition he had unrelated to the cancer. I walked him 3 times a day regardless of weather. We were retired when we got him so I was with him 24/7/365. Now, he is gone, and it seems life is gone also. There is a large hole in each day which he had been filling.  Just when I think I am over this, it come down hard again. I have no plans to get another dog. I don't want to sign up to face  this loss again when  the new dog dies. Plus at my age the new dog may outlive me, and I don't want to have  the dog suffer through loss of  their pal. It would be unfair. People ask will you get another dog. I say I don't want a new dog. I want Preston. The way ahead seems bleak and hopeless. I have several serious hobbies, so lack of activity to keep me busy is not the problem. Not having Preston is the problem. One day at a time. 

Edited September 26 by Jim M
Grammar

[KayC]

I am so sorry.  I, too, lost my soulmate in a dog, Arlie, to cancer five years ago.  

Comfort for Grieving Animal Lovers

A Dangerous Villain: Guilt
Breaking the Power of Guilt
A Dangerous Villain: Guilt
http://www.pet-loss.net/guilt.shtml
http://www.griefhealing.com/article-loss-and-the-burden-of-guilt.htm
https://www.griefhealingblog.com/2019/08/pet-loss-when-guilt-overshadows-grief.html
https://www.griefhealingblog.com/2017/07/pet-loss-when-guilt-goes-unresolved.html

I hope this short video brings you some comfort and peace.

 

It helped me to write memories of his life, so he'd never be forgotten...

And our cancer journey...

 

[Butterfly90]

I’m so very sorry for your loss.

i had my beloved Springer Spaniel put to sleep yesterday, so I know exactly the gut wrenching pain and sadness you are experiencing.

They leave such a massive hole in our lives when they’re no longer here. Life just isn’t the same.

i have lost a dog before, but every time you convince yourself that you will never get over it. In all honesty, I don’t think you ever get over it, you just learn to adapt and life does become more bearable. It’s going to take time. Be kind to yourself and as you say, take one day at a time.

Love and hugs.
 

 

 

[KayC]

27 minutes ago, Butterfly90 said:

In all honesty, I don’t think you ever get over it, you just learn to adapt and life does become more bearable. It’s going to take time. Be kind to yourself and as you say, take one day at a time.

So true.

[Jim M]

This is Preston.  He was an angel.

[foreverhis]

He’s absolutely adorable. Such a wonderful smile. I am so very sorry you lost him.

Losing my husband will always be the hardest thing I ever have to go through, but I can honestly say that until then, the most painful losses for me were beloved companion animals.

We lost my husband’s soulmate-in-a-cat Penny to cancer. Watching her struggle those last weeks became more than we could bear, so we made the appointment to let her go knowing that we would be taking her pain on for ourselves in the form of grief. The night before, she died in my husband’s arms. It ripped our hearts apart for a long time because they aren’t “just pets” to us. They are family. Not everyone understands that. The members here do.

Your Preston was a precious gift. I have faith that the Rainbow Bridge exists, though almost certainly not in the way our limited human minds envision it, and that we will be reunited in some way when it’s our time. I hold onto that when things seem darkest.

I have found that time softens and eases the weight of deep grief. It doesn’t go away, but it becomes something we carry with us as part of who we are. The love is there always.❤️

[KayC]

I'm glad you had him in your life. Even when we lose them, those memories are something to hold onto, although in the beginning we only feel pain.

[Jim M]

News :   I have started vvolunteering to walk dogs at the local no-kill shelter. Its fun getting to know different dogs and make them happy, even for just the time of a nice walk. Next best thing for me, to actually owning one. I know I could never deal with the grief of losing a pet of my own again. 

 

 

[AJWCat]

I think that's wonderful that you are volunteering. There are so many sad animals that need love and care.

I adopted a senior dog who was 13 at the time and she's managed to live to over 15 now. I know we are on borrowed time (to quote the vet) and I dread the day that it's time. She has lots of health issues as it is and I try to make her comfortable and happy. I won't allow her to suffer though. So, I understand your hesitation. I haven't had her long but I love her and it's always soooo hard.  

 

[KayC]

Another avenue is fostering.  I walked a neighbor's dog after my Arlie passed.