I lost my mother-in-law and cannot speak.

[CowboyRenee]

I lost my mother-in-law last week who I was incredibly close to. I think I could bear the pain, if I could speak it. But I can't. I lost my ability to speak about three months ago and the isolation I live with is impossible to bear. I can't share memories, except by text, or speak my grief to a friend or therapist or clergy person or anyone. I can't leave my house because I am disabled either. I have a spouse but of course he has lost his mother and is now taking care of his father, so he doesn't have the time or patience to help me communicate. I feel I'm in solitary confinement. We have a close friend who is on his deathbed too and demands a lot of time from my husband. The friend is an alcoholic dying of liver disease and, honestly, I have some resentment towards him for drinking himself to death and not giving us the space to grieve our mother. I am just living with so much loss right now between the loss of loved ones and loss of my speech and mobility. I can't bear it.