My 19 year old childhood dog is slowly dying

[Des16]

My sweet boy has been strong for 19 years but now he's showing signs he's dying. I want to put him down because he's gotten skinny, constantly throwing up, and can barely get up. I think my brothers are having a hard time accepting it. I brought up the fact we should put him down soon and one of them stays silent and the other doesn't think the signs are of death but just of sickness. They keep making excuses to not deal with reality. It's pretty obvious with his age that he's tired and it's his time to go. I don't wanna see my sweet baby suffer anymore. It's been a hard decision on my end but I'm accepting it. I can't stop thinking of all my memories with him. I've had him since before I was 1 year old. I miss how fluffy he used to be, how he would play tug of war with his toy, how he would jump on me when I got home from school, and I wish I could've spent more time with him and treated him better.   I know thinking like that makes it worse but I can't help it. I try not to feel guilty.

[KayC]

I am so sorry.  I went through this with my Arlie although he was only 11 1/2 when he died.  He was my soulmate in a dog, I lost my husband when we were still young, 19 years ago Father's Day.

The what ifs blame game happens to most of us going through early grief, it did me when my husband died nearly 19 years ago...it's not that we are guilty of anything but loving them, and the truth is feelings are not facts, but it's that we can't wrap our heads around what happened, and our mind is trying to find some different possible outcome so it searches all the what ifs...

Comfort for Grieving Animal Lovers

A Dangerous Villain: Guilt
Breaking the Power of Guilt
A Dangerous Villain: Guilt
http://www.pet-loss.net/guilt.shtml
http://www.griefhealing.com/article-loss-and-the-burden-of-guilt.htm
https://www.griefhealingblog.com/2019/08/pet-loss-when-guilt-overshadows-grief.html
https://www.griefhealingblog.com/2017/07/pet-loss-when-guilt-goes-unresolved.html

I hope this short video brings you some comfort and peace.

 

I wrote these memories as a way of keeping him alive.