Members nessanova Posted May 26, 2012 Members Report Share Posted May 26, 2012 On June 14th, 2011 I got the call saying my Dad died. A bit of background: my Dad got locked up 63 days before my 2nd birthday. I absolutely know what you’re thinking, because everyone says the same thing: “How could you guys possibly have been close?” “How could he have been any sort of Dad?” Blah… Blah… Blah… Throughout those fifteen years/180 months/780 weeks/5475 days he taught me every single thing a text book couldn’t. I didn’t need him sitting right there to know that he loved me, or for him to do a good job raising me. Every week I knew there was going to be a letter in my mailbox and a one hour phone call, of him spinning wisdom FAR beyond his years and telling me how proud of me he was and how much he loved me. He got released 63 days before my 17th birthday. Fifteen years exactly (as it turns out for a crime he didn’t actually do, but that’s a whole other story). After 46 beautiful days of freedom he literally dropped dead. He fought with everything he had for fifteen years to be free, to be here for me, to be with our family, and he didn’t even get two months with us. It all seemed even crazier because he worked out every single day and he was THIRTY FIVE. Let me repeat that, fit as a fiddle, THIRTY FIVE and dropped dead…? Nothing made any sense. All anyone could say to me was time heals all wounds, which is certified B.S. Every time I look in the mirror, every time I see a Pooh Bear (Pooh was his nickname), every time I see front teeth with a gap he flashes through my head. It’s been almost a year and up to this point I haven’t really talked about him/how I feel with many people. Everyone seems to think that because he was only physically with me for about two months at the end I’m not allowed to be sad or confused or lonely. Our bond was so far beyond anything else I’ve ever experienced, there weren’t all the hugs and kisses, no tear wiping, no discipline, just love… pure, unconditional love. I can only hope someday all this starts to make sense so I can move past this and be happy again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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