My bulldog puppy slipped into the pool

[Cat_]

I had a sweet, goofy miniature bulldog. He got into the backyard and walked onto the pool tarp and slipped in. The wooden gate to the backyard had been closed the entire morning as it always was. That morning, I let both our dogs out (my husband and I also have a Husky) to do their business. They'd walk around the perimeter or there's small spots behind a tree where they'd occasionally relax after tiring each other out with play, and that was normal. We had a technician come by to set up the internet that afternoon. He had to go through that gate during the installation, and it turned out he did not close it completely. My husband was at work all day and I was busy coordinating appliance delivery and door measurements that day as well, so I hadn't even been outside since then to realize. That evening, we let them both out in the front yard before bed as usual. When I stood back up from the porch to check on them, I found the gate ajar. There was no noise from the gate or the pool and the gate wasn't open wide enough to see it from where I was on the porch. I saw the gap in the pool tarp and banged on the back door screaming for my husband to help me. We pulled him out and tried CPR and brought him to an emergency vet, but by the time we got there, he was gone... From what I've seen online, between the colder water and his short snout, it would have happened very quickly. It was so fast and so quiet and I keep telling myself it was an accident and we did all we could. He was just 10 months old. We loved him so much every single day of his life. I'm a heartbroken wreck.

[KayC]

I am so sorry for your loss, it's the hardest thing in the world.  I wish so much with you that the ending was different.

The what ifs blame game happens to most of us going through early grief, it did me when my husband died nearly 18 years ago...it's not that we are guilty of anything but loving them, and the truth is feelings are not facts, but it's that we can't wrap our heads around what happened, and our mind is trying to find some different possible outcome so it searches all the what ifs...

Comfort for Grieving Animal Lovers

A Dangerous Villain: Guilt
Breaking the Power of Guilt
A Dangerous Villain: Guilt
http://www.pet-loss.net/guilt.shtml
http://www.griefhealing.com/article-loss-and-the-burden-of-guilt.htm
https://www.griefhealingblog.com/2019/08/pet-loss-when-guilt-overshadows-grief.html
https://www.griefhealingblog.com/2017/07/pet-loss-when-guilt-goes-unresolved.html

I hope this short video brings you some comfort and peace.

 

[AJWCat]

My heart breaks reading this, I am very sorry for your loss.