It’s been four years and it hurts

[JadaHerme201920]

I want to say hello to everyone in this forum. I have all kinds of emotions going on today. Tomorrow marks four years since my Momma passed away. My heart aches and I still feel an emptiness.  I miss her with every passing moment.  But I stand today trying to stay in peace and not sadness or depression.  My siblings and dad take her passing different or the way they express themselves are so different than myself. I have had to find my own way.  I don’t have words for it but it’s like a walking endlessly trying to find understanding. Praying for all of you - please do it for me. 

[Traz]

Hi JadaHerme,

It will be the 4th anniversary of my mom's passing in September 2023. Like you, I have so many emotions and I feel  emptiness on most days, even now.

Last night I was back in my home town and I found myself driving past her apartment building. It looks exactly like it did four years ago and I could still picture her at the lobby door, waiting for me to pick her up. Why I did that to myself, I'll never know. Grief is strange. 

Yes, my siblings handled their grief differently too. I also understand what you mean about finding your own way. I have a specific journal that I write to my mom in. I feel like I'm just writing her a letter, but that she is listening. It really does help me. Do whatever you need to do to feel that connection with your mom. They are always with us, I truly believe that. 

I will pray for you. Sending light and positive thoughts.

Traz