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Currently losing sister


jpmj2008

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I'm having a very difficult time finding anyone to chat with about the current process of losing my sister.  She lives with me, will be 41 on 1/22/08.  I'm her younger sister with two other sisters older than me, an older and younger brother.  Does anyone want to talk about the not-so-pleasant thoughts and feelings surrounding being the sole caregiver to someone who is dying?  Every place always says, "You're not alone in your feelings," but nothing I read comes close to what I'm feeling.  Any takers?

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Hi Jpmj,

I'm sorry about what you're going through.  Although I didn't nurse my sister, I was her emotional caretaker until her death on April 13, 2006 at the age of 40.  (we were actually cousins, but decided at a young age that we had to be sisters - I never thought of her any other way).   We lived 1 1/2 hours apart and spoke 5-10 times a day.  She would call, without even saying hello and just start right into conversation.  I really miss that.

She had been really sick and refusing all treatment.  She eventually ended up in hospital and passed 18 days later.  I tried to spend my days with her at the hospital and I exercised her limbs to keep them limber, and sang to her and told her how cute her doctors were.

Although I haven't gone through what you are now going through, I do know what it's like to know that you are going to lose your sister.  Please feel free to email me.

Sending you lots of hugs, Linda

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hi jpmj, i too took care of my father for 4 months. he had a brain tumor and also a stroke so he was in a wheelchair. my father was a youthful 75 years old and because of the tumor and stroke, he couldn't walk on his own, was paralyzed on left side and the tumor was making him forget everything. i know what you are going through. my father died 2 months ago and i miss him. even taking care of him i miss that. it is very hard on the caretaker but in the long run , you are going to look back and say you were glad you did it and that you sister needs you. i would do it over again. it was hard but i knew it wasn't going to be forever and i tried to make his life as good as i could. take care and i hope this helps you go through your days .  lifechange

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