Members DogMom1 Posted October 7, 2022 Members Report Share Posted October 7, 2022 "My favorite hello and hardest goodbye"...I came across this quote while searching for an urn. Perfect wording regarding my feelings for my Lil Girl. I've been so incredibly angry that I had to search for an urn to begin with!! Well, I go back and forth between anger and emotional agony. Lil Girl, my perfect little Yorkshire Terrier, the smallest of her siblings, passed away early this past Sunday morning. I've been on auto pilot ever since. I'm in so much emotional pain that I'm barely able to concentrate long enough to write this. I was there the snowy December night that she was born. She almost didn't make it that first night. She's had it rough since her very beginning, but I was instantly in love with her. Four pounds of pep, bossiness and attitude, but she walked me through hell and back (yes, she walked me) About a year and a half ago she was diagnosed with Cushing's disease. I read and researched for hours about treatment, conventional and herbal. I spent my every spare moment determined to save her and I still failed. The morning I found her, I thought my heart was literally going to burst. I can't even put into words how completely heartbroken and devastated I am without her. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators KayC Posted October 7, 2022 Moderators Report Share Posted October 7, 2022 I am so sorry for your loss and all you are going through with it. You didn't fail her, you gave it your best, I could say the same for my Arlie (cancer, died over three years ago), I cooked for him as he had acute chronic lifelong colitis...then he gets inoperable cancer, liver shut down. He made it two more months, ten days. My precious baby. Comfort for Grieving Animal Lovers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members DogMom1 Posted October 7, 2022 Author Members Report Share Posted October 7, 2022 @KayC, thank you for your kind words and I am so sorry that you lost your Arlie. I am so sorry that anyone has to endure this kind of heartache! Worst feeling ever!! I don't even know what to do with myself. Ive just been continuing with my daily routine and trying to focus on my other dog, which in a way feels like disrespect to her memory. But, I can't let him down... We are all each other has now. He misses her just as much as I do...he keeps looking for her and has barely touched his food in 5 days. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members AJWCat Posted October 7, 2022 Members Report Share Posted October 7, 2022 Oh I am so so sorry to read about your loss. It's soooo tough. Routines change. Everything changes. I have often told people that living life is not disrespect, it's to honor her memory. To honor how amazing a force she was in her life that you are someone who can keep going and be there for your other dog. She helped you be that person. And you will never forget her, she'll never be far from your thoughts. (I know it's been 5 years for me.) Hang in there. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators KayC Posted October 8, 2022 Moderators Report Share Posted October 8, 2022 12 hours ago, DogMom1 said: Ive just been continuing with my daily routine and trying to focus on my other dog, which in a way feels like disrespect to her memory. But, I can't let him down... We are all each other has now. He misses her just as much as I do...he keeps looking for her and has barely touched his food in 5 days. That is what you can and should do and I commend you for doing it. When my husband died, my dog grieved greatly, acting out, it took my daughter to call it to my attention as I was lost in my own grief, so when she did, I made sure to go out of my way to spend time with Lucky and it helped get her through it. Grieving Pet Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members DogMom1 Posted October 8, 2022 Author Members Report Share Posted October 8, 2022 @AJWCat thank you! I've read your post "what I've learned" probably 4+ times and each time I find hope that I may be able to find that strength as well! Very nicely written. I am so sorry that you lost your kitty unexpectedly, but I am glad that you have found healing. As well as being there for people like me, who are experiencing this kind of heartbreak for the first time. This has been just as awful or worse than when my favorite Grandma passed. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members DogMom1 Posted October 8, 2022 Author Members Report Share Posted October 8, 2022 @KayC Good heavens, I'm sorry that you lost your husband as well. And as I said to AJWCat...thank you for being there for people like me. You are needed and speaking to both of you, helps. Sounds like you understand exactly how I feel. As far as my other dog, Phil...he is Lil Girl's uncle also. He has been with me everywhere, every second of everyday since last Sunday. He finally ate about 5 bits of his kibble and a treat this evening, thankfully. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators KayC Posted October 8, 2022 Moderators Report Share Posted October 8, 2022 I am so glad you have him! I lost my 25 1/2 year old Kitty just 4 1/2 months after losing Arlie, so hard, we were a family of four (lost Miss Mocha in 2016) and then down to just me. I got Kodie a few months later, my son brought him, he was a lifesaver, I was still grieving heavily (I don't think we ever stop but it does evolved) but then here came this little ball of fluff! The day I got him, with my son's dog. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members DogMom1 Posted October 8, 2022 Author Members Report Share Posted October 8, 2022 Both beautiful dogs!! I am sorry that you lost so much in such a short time, you are a warrior. You have my respect for being able to cope and heal as you have. For me... I did say about 2 years ago that I was only trying to outlive my dogs, I couldn't bear the thought of leaving them behind. That was my frame of mind at that point in my life. I guess God was listening. I keep trying to post a pic of Lil Girl so you can see her, but it's 1.7 kb oversize and won't let me.... Going to try and downsize, see if that works 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members DogMom1 Posted October 8, 2022 Author Members Report Share Posted October 8, 2022 No matter what I do, keeps telling me that the picture file is too big 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators KayC Posted October 9, 2022 Moderators Report Share Posted October 9, 2022 I went through that, make sure it's the only picture posting and I resize in Paint Change size and don't forget to crop or it won't shrink the properties. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members DogMom1 Posted October 9, 2022 Author Members Report Share Posted October 9, 2022 Ok, will try that. Thank you 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members DogMom1 Posted October 9, 2022 Author Members Report Share Posted October 9, 2022 Well, I tried still saying the file is too large... And I tried with several different photos. Ones of her before and after the Cushing's diagnosis. Ugh, frustrating 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators KayC Posted October 10, 2022 Moderators Report Share Posted October 10, 2022 If you message me your email address I will respond the same, you can then email it to me, I will make it smaller and post it for you. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators KayC Posted October 13, 2022 Moderators Report Share Posted October 13, 2022 Here your pictures are! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members DogMom1 Posted October 13, 2022 Author Members Report Share Posted October 13, 2022 @KayC, thanks much!!! My pretty Lil Girl. So lost without her 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators KayC Posted October 14, 2022 Moderators Report Share Posted October 14, 2022 I know, Hon. Just allow yourself to feel what you feel and take your time grieving. We're listening. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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