I'm blame myself for my dog's death

[Kris A.]

i just lost by 5 yr old dog the other day. She has been sick for weeks now but the last five days we saw how it got worse. I don't have much to give her the medical attention she needed and i just hoped she would recover. we tried taking extra care of her but it didn't do much. i loved her so much and my mom loved her even more. i loved her. i truly did. and now i feel lost without her following me around. the house feels colder not having her around. its my fault she died. i couldn't afford to save her. she loved us so much. she was so good. she was calm but energetic. she was always there in every rough and sad moments. she made us laugh. she was so good but we let her down. we didn't give her the saving that she needed. its my fault she's gone. its my fault she suffered. im really sorry. i truly am. 

[KayC]

I am so sorry, @Kris A..  I would NOT say it's your fault when you couldn't afford treatment...you can or you can't, sometimes we do not have $ and how is it supposed to materialize?!  It's sad our country has become so $ driven and vets charge so much.  Gone are the days of James Harriot and trading services for a dozen eggs. (if you aren't familiar, he wrote All Creatures Great and Small and the subsequent sequels, amazing books by a country vet).

I hope you can focus on your grief instead of what you could not do anything about, and recognize your pain and loss rather than what you can't change.  It's common to go through all of the what ifs in early grief as we want to find some other possible ending other than the one that happened, it's not even conscious, we just do it.  The one that happened just seems too inconceivable to grasp!  So our mind tries to come up with a different possible ending, yet you can't know for a fact she could have been saved.  

 

Comfort for Grieving Animal Lovers

A Dangerous Villain: Guilt
Breaking the Power of Guilt
A Dangerous Villain: Guilt
http://www.pet-loss.net/guilt.shtml
http://www.griefhealing.com/article-loss-and-the-burden-of-guilt.htm
https://www.griefhealingblog.com/2019/08/pet-loss-when-guilt-overshadows-grief.html
https://www.griefhealingblog.com/2017/07/pet-loss-when-guilt-goes-unresolved.html

I hope this short video brings you some comfort and peace.